YA fantasy about girl with golden hair.

When I was in Jr High( sometime between 1999-2001), I read a trilogy. In this trilogy, the main character was a girl. she was raised by her grandmother, who was also the village wisewoman/something. She had blonde/golden hair. In the Beginning of the first book, her grandmother braided ("Plaited") her hair, and counted the plaits. It was decided she was old enough to do something-- learn how to midwife? something.-- and so the girl went on an adventure of some sort. Through the course of the series, the girls hair goes from gold to silver. Possibly because she learns magic, or gathers some sort of knowledge. I remember a scene where she is digging a hole under the floor of a house in a village, which has been/is being attacked.
The beginning of each chapter has a short proverb or quote.
I have been searching for these books forever. If any of this sounds familiar, and if anyone can help me, I would be so happy. Published pre 2002. The covers of the books had distinctive artwork, with portraits of the girl, and possibly the moon, stars, and sun, on each separate cover. The cover art may have been similar to art by Leo and Diane Dillon.Medieval/Alternate history setting, in a magical world.
Possibly the main character becomes mute at some point. Weaving and tapestries is possible. I remember she found an egg or an egg shaped gem at one point. Possibly beneath the floor in the village house I mentioned above.
I've got my finger crossed. :)

I've found it!!
The Dragons Tapestry by Martine Bates!

Great! This sounds like a really interesting series.

Touchstone: The dragon's tapestry