Susan CainCritiques

A good beginning examination but perhaps too hastily researched without thorough attribution to people like Ernest Becker and Viktor Frankl, the originators of some of the ideas mentioned. The corporate "self-help" sections were off putting and perhaps the least well thought out.

Highly recommended for anyone who thinks they are weird because they don’t like being around people. This book explains the diversity of human nature and how so much of the external world is built just for the loud people. It will make you realize you’re not that weird after all.

If you are an introvert reading this book will be like a validation of your whole life.

If you know an introvert, reading it will help you understand their behavior.

I wish that everyone I knew would read this book.

Validating!

Most impactful book I've read in a while. Anyone that considers them self even a little introverted should read this. And extroverts too!

This was disappointing for me since I enjoyed her previous book, Quiet. While it started out interesting enough for me, it quickly to veered off into assorted anecdotes that felt like they were ripped out of corporate motivational speeches. Random study after random study was mentioned to make a point but since I was listening to the audio version, I have no idea how large the studies were or who sponsored them etc. I felt like it went from one sad story to the next ... I guess it just didn't grab me the way it did for many others.

Too much anecdote and not enough fact. The author did cite studies but often in a way that was just too far-fetched. For example, the study about different types of people listening to music at different volumes mentions decibels without any explanation of the exponential scale so I suspect the author didn't even appreciate how her comments were too hard to swallow.

Too much padding. She describes walking into people's offices, what they were wearing, what was on their walls, etc. Who cares? Get to the point already! Remove all this unnecessary verbiage and the book could have been 50 pages and covered the material just as well.

Well researched, well presented.

Ich bin ein wenig überrascht, dass mir das Lesen des Buches doch sehr schwer gefallen ist. Die Grundbotschaft ist schnell verstanden, nämlich dass Introvertierte oft unterschätzt werden, obwohl sie eine große Bereicherung für die Gesellschaft wären. Das Buch ist sehr amerikanisch und ich denke auch, dass die USA als eine der Nationen, die Extraversion am meisten wertschätzt, für Introvertierte ein schwieriger Ort ist. Denn natürlich ist es angesehener - auch bei uns in Deutschland - wenn ein junger Mensch mit Freunden ein Festival organisiert, als wenn er zweimal am Tag meditiert. Aber möglich ist ja zum Glück beides, spätestens nach der Pubertät. Dabei möchte ich das Leid introvertierter Kinder in der extravertierten Welt auch gar nicht abwerten, als Mutter eines sehr introvertierten Kindes weiß auch ich sehr wohl, was das bedeutet.
Aber das Buch ist eben sehr amerikanisch. Einzelschicksale, vor allem das eigene, werden als Evidenz angeführt. Studien werden so zitiert, dass sie zur These passen. Das hat mir nicht immer gefallen. Denn letztendlich ist Introversion-Extraversion vermutlich ein Spektrum, keine Dichotomie. Diesen Gedanken eröffnet die Autorin auch am Ende des Buches.
Für mich war die Erkenntnis sehr erhellend, dass ich wohl selbst auch introvertiert und hochsensibel bin. Ich schaue nie fern, brauche sehr lange um mich von sozialen Ereignissen (z.B. der gestrigen Weihnachtszusammenkunft mit meinen Geschwistern) zu erholen, so positiv sie auch gewesen sind. Da ich aber keine soziale Angst habe, zum Beispiel kein Problem habe öffentlich zu sprechen und auch keine Angst, meine Meinung zu sagen, sind das vermutlich verschiedene Phänomene.
Bei meinem Mann hingegen, der ungern öffentlich spricht, dudelt den ganzen Tag das Radio und er ist von unserer gestrigen Feier in keinster Weise mitgenommen, im Gegenteil, er zieht daraus eher Energie und hat schon alles aufgeräumt.
Wer ist also hier hochsensibel und wer nicht, wer introvertiert und wer extravertiert?
Ich kann also nicht mit allem ganz mitgehen. Ich zum Beispiel kann sehr gut Gedanken in Gruppen entwickeln, die für mich wie ein Resonanzraum fungieren. Auch finde ich, dass das Buch mehr Struktur bräuchte. Aber insgesamt bringt es doch interessante Gedanken aufs Tapet.½

I wouldn't normally read something verging on pop psychology, but Cain does an okay job evaluating her sources and has extremely important things to say about our cultural valuation of extroversion.

This book especially changed the way that I see introversion in the workplace / leadership roles. It also helped me understand what it might be like to be extremely sensitive to overstimulating environments (something that had previously made no sense to me, as I'm an extreme introvert and enjoy crowds and novel environments as long as I'm not expected to socialize).

Highly recommended to everyone, not just introverts!

This book is a lot like Quiet, albeit a different subject. But the general idea is the same. Cain identifies a part of her personality that seems in conflict with the world and creates a lawyer's argument about why society is wrong, and that the personality trait is better than most people acknowledge.

In this case it is what she most often refers to as longing. As such, this book has a bit more of a spiritual feeling to it than did Quiet. But anyone who loved Quiet will probably love this book as well.

This book provides fresh insight on the qualities of the introverted personality. I saw many of my experiences reflected in the stories told here. Especially meaningful to me is the recognition that one need not struggle against one’s own personality limits; it is more fulfilling to seek new capacities while respecting one’s fundamental traits. Probably Cain’s greatest contribution is her critique of extroversion as a universal ideal fri success in life — a view particularly oppressive to the quiet people among us.

This book was very insightful, and I really enjoyed reading it. What I appreciated the most were the scientific, physiological reasons for introverted behavior. It also explored traits that are often linked to introversion, but not exclusively, such as high/low "reactivity" or "sensitivity" to external stimulation. The book was helpful for my understanding of extroverts, as well.

I disagreed with Cain's comments on evolution. She refers to our shared familial history with monkeys, but provides no true evidence to support it.

My last complaint is that of her reference to "the Western God" (pg 189), referring to the Christian God. Firstly, the Christian God does not somehow belong only to the Western world. Secondly, her assumptions about Him apparently are conceived from "Jesus Christ Superstar," which is what she references instead of the Holy Bible. This seemed like a rather ridiculous failing considering the obvious attention to detail that she paid to her research for other aspects of the book. As a Christian myself, I found it frustrating that she would portray my Lord rather carelessly that way, since religion is an incredibly important cultural issue. She took such care in approaching the cultural issue of the "Extrovert Ideal" with balance and thought, and I find it unfortunate that she overlooked the importance of doing the same with religion.

All in all, however, the book was a very intriguing read, and I would recommend it to introverts and extroverts alike for greater understanding of how our brains truly work.

Update 1/18/21: During my second read-through, I noticed that many of the traits Cain (and other researchers) attributed to introversion or extroversion often seemed more related to the traits of "turbulence" and "assertiveness" as defined by the www.16personalities.com interpretation of the MBTI.

There is some brief profanity.

Such an interesting book. Good to read for introverts; but will extroverts?

Nice to finally understand that the trait is at least partly genetic. Just wonder if intro is normal and extro an aberration? Probably both are needed, or we’d all be bred out of existence.

I tend to be wary of pop psychology books, but Quiet came well recommended by multiple sources. I had the opportunity to do a couple of leadership training workshops over the last couple of years and it kept coming up. I'm glad I read it. I think I feel this way about a lot of pop psychology books; I have an initially suspicious attitude, but I end up thinking about the book a lot after I finish reading it. I think I will feel the same way about this one.

I know that most people understand the basic idea of introverts and extroverts. I tend to be very cautious about categorizing people into one category or the other, and I strongly suspect things like the Myers-Briggs test are more pseudoscience than actual science. However, I like that we have a book that shows a lot of examples of how introverts are undervalued and as somebody that would definitely be classified as an introvert, it's reassuring.

Some of the bits about children kind of make me wonder. For instance, the author gives lots of advice about how parents shouldn't be worried about their introverted children and should look for ways of supporting them. Maybe it's just my background, but I got the idea that parents were probably more thrilled to have introverted children, because those kids tend to be quieter and easier to manage. So I wonder if the author is overstating the patholigization of introverted children in our society.

But overall, I think this book is helpful for people - namely introverts - to draw power from (I'm very curious to see what extroverts think about this book). Maybe people that would describe themselves as introverts will enjoy knowing that they can be very successful and have as powerful of an impact on the world around them as the extroverts do. And also that it is okay to be introverted and learn from the key advice, which is to take time to recharge and look for ways to play to your strengths (especially when on a team of extroverts).

Another thing that I'll be thinking about long after this book is off my shelf is the idea that introverts are more likely to take the time to process things and give meaningful feedback rather than just saying something just to say something. That's something I respect and try to practice. I do think that teaching introverts and people that would consider themselves shy how to express themselves more is valuable. I've thought more and more about looking for opportunities for quiet people to practice being more comfortable speaking and advocating for themselves, especially during an anxiety epidemic. It's incredibly valuable personality and absolutely necessary professionally. It's reassuring to see that other folks agree.

A very nice read. Basically the book version of the Pixar movie, “Inside Out”

Interesting book. Lots for the reader to think about. I'm an iintrovert and as a child did feel pressure to be more outgoing.. These days the kids still feel pressure, especially with so much social media etc. but information like the author discusses maybe will help people have a more balanced attitude toward all kinds of personalities.

I am introvert and I have lived in an extrovert world. I used to be quite, shy and almost invisible, always standing at the corner. I was happy with my books and doing hand work and solitude! Everyone had an advice for me. Be social, talk! That's not good. That's not normal! I always thought that something was wrong with me. It took years to understand how to live in this world and how to overcome my shyness and I'm normal as any other extroverts. I wish I could read this book when I was 16. This book is not just for introverts people. One third of the people are introvert, so you or one of your relatives is introvert. introverts have to learn how to live in this extroverts societies and extroverts need to learn how to communicate with introverts. this book has done a good job of explaining the differences and presenting many researches and theories about introvert/extrovert psychologies.

I cried with relief reading Cain's words. How freeing to learn that my "highly sensitive" nature - unnerved by violence and the evening news, super-conscientious, drained by crowd situations, even being made edgy by caffeine -- is researched, valid, normal and even holds power for good.

After growing up ashamed for dissolving into tears, wearing my heart on my sleeve, or stammering a defense of my "thin skinned" response to bullying or criticism, Cain's book is a breath of fresh air for this introvert.

I just can't finish this book. It just feels too self helpy to me.

I love this book and the way the Susan Cain explains introverts are as normal as loud people, specially when about one third to a half population are introverts even they don't recognise or don't accept to be an introvert. I think she makes a good balance between both personalities and makes us understand that it's ok being a quiet person no matter how much other people push us to be talkative and no matter how much society thinks wants us to be in the same room all the time.

If I had to describe this book I would say is about tolerance and understanding other people.

There's no denying that as citizens of the United States we live in a society that celebrates the brash extroverts and tolerates the quiet introverts. But in her book Susan Cain offers many compelling insights and concrete examples of just how much society needs the quiet introspective minds of the introverts and of the many valuable accomplishments they have made and if allowed, will continue to make.

Parent, sibling, friend, teacher... everyone should read this book!

Starts great and ends great, but the middle was really poor and hard to get through

An amazing book that made me understand myself, and others, in a brand new light. Highly recommended. You should really read this book.