Tallu Schuyler Quinn

I’ve always loved cancer stories but when I started this I wasn’t sure I was going to read it. This author was really religious. I realize that many people are and I have enjoyed quite a few books by people who are religious and who include that in their books but here the author frequently mentions God and cites biblical passages. Too often for me. She had been a seminary student and God/religion was integral to her life. Also, what bothered me more, is the opposite of vegan attitude. Her mentions of how animals “give” their bodies, their eggs, etc. bothered me. She shares many examples of her cooking and of the food project(s) she worked on using animals for food. I know that 99% of people do have her attitudes about farmed animals but reading it was disturbing. Those two beliefs she had kept me from identifying with her. My feelings about death will never mirror hers because our opinions differ about what death is.

She’s a good writer though (because of her brain cancer and its affects, especially how it impaired her vision, she did have help with most of the writing) and she’s an excellent storyteller. These are beautifully written essays. When I could dissociate enough to try to ignore the religion/farmed animals passages I appreciated her narrative. I was particularly interested in what she noticed about the physical effects she experienced from her brain cancer.

This book is the best kind of gift she could have left to her children and to others who loved her and cared about her. If we could have had conversations sans religion and animal based foods I would have enjoyed her company but I doubt she would have had interest in that. She was a mensch. She was a good person and tried to do a lot of good in her life. I like that though she was Christian she was interested in various denominations and other religions. She was a feminist and non-judgmental and her life’s work was in various areas of social and food justice. She was psychologically minded and I particularly admired how she made sure her children got support and therapy throughout her illness and how she made plans in advance to do what she could to ease their grief after her death even as she was aware she wouldn’t know what would work. Her honesty about everything was wonderful.

There were some laugh out moments for me when reading this. I appreciated the included humor.

Despite not being sure I could get through this and not enjoying the constant religious references this was a page-turner for me. She writes about her illness and impending death. She also writes about the covid-19 pandemic which happened at the same time. She writes about all sorts of things including her growing up years, her various travels and careers. She writes about other people including her husband, her children, her parents, her brothers, her friends, people she’s known through work and others. I found it riveting and a very fast read. Just as she (naturally) wanted more time I wish there were even more essays in this book. I couldn’t get enough.

She includes some passages by other writers. Most of them are poems.

There were titled artworks in the book that seemed to me might be of her brain/illness and as I was reading I wondered if they were her art. (She was an artist and one of her majors was in papermaking and book design.) At the end there is a note I am glad was included. She reveals that the artworks were done by her and her kids together and she chose them because of all the art they made these eight “best captured how visually and cognitively confusing my experience is right now.” She died after a year and a half of illness with glioblastoma.

Highly recommended for anyone wanting to contemplate their mortality or someone else’s mortality, those who enjoy short autobiographical essays and people interested in social justice issues. It will likely increase their enjoyment if God/religion is a part of readers’ lives. I can recommend this to most readers though. I figure that if I could enjoy this almost anyone can and many will appreciate it even more than I did. The religion/Good and animal based food mentions are probably the only reasons I didn’t give this book 5 stars. It’s a superb book.

“Our relationship with time is so curious to me now—how we assume we will have it, how we squander it, how we unknowingly numb ourselves to the gift of it."… (plus d'informations)