Smacked is hard to put down. It opens with the author, Eilene finding her ex-husband dead at his home after not responding to texts or phone calls for multiple days. After a 25 year marriage and 2 kids, he's swept into a downward spiral of drug abuse. Eilene simply cannot comprehend this information when she learns it from the EMTs, police and others who arrive on the day of her 911 call. He was a lawyer, went to a fancy university, lived in a multi-million dollar house and she simply cannot put the two people into one, drug abuser and high powered attorney. I listened to the audiobook in two days and highly recommend it. ( )

Zimmerman does such a great job writing about her husband's drug addiction and she & her family's painful, clueless witness to his fall and death. It's both story well told and how report of her research and struggle to cope. Her insightful chapter on Better living through chemicals was really well done. Even though the law profession as well as the medical field have looked at this issue among their professionals we have much to change at still. I would recommend this all but most importantly to any going into the law field as well the medical field. ( )

My latest listen is Smacked: A Story of White-Collar Ambition, Addiction, and Tragedy by Eilene Zimmerman.

From Penguin Random House:

"A journalist pieces together the mysteries surrounding her ex-husband’s descent into drug addiction while trying to rebuild a life for her family, taking readers on an intimate journey into the world of white-collar drug abuse.

Something was wrong with Peter. Eilene Zimmerman noticed that her ex-husband looked thin, seemed distracted, and was frequently absent from activities with their children. She thought he looked sick and needed to see a doctor, and indeed, he told her he had been diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder. Yet in many ways, Peter seemed to have it all: a beautiful house by the beach, expensive cars, and other luxuries that came with an affluent life. Eilene assumed his odd behavior was due to stress and overwork—he was a senior partner at a prominent law firm and had been working more than sixty hours a week for the last twenty years.

Although they were divorced, Eilene and Peter had been partners and friends for decades, so when she and her children were unable to reach Peter for several days, Eilene went to his house to see if he was OK.

So begins Smacked, a brilliant and moving memoir of Eilene’s shocking discovery, one that sets her on a journey to find out how a man she knew for nearly thirty years became a drug addict, hiding it so well that neither she nor anyone else in his life suspected what was happening. Eilene discovers that Peter led a secret life, one that started with pills and ended with opioids, cocaine, and methamphetamine. He was also addicted to work; the last call Peter ever made was to dial in to a conference call.

Eilene is determined to learn all she can about Peter’s hidden life, and also about drug addiction among ambitious, high-achieving professionals like him. Through extensive research and interviews, she presents a picture of drug dependence today in that moneyed, upwardly mobile world. She also embarks on a journey to re-create her life in the wake of loss, both of the person—and the relationship—that profoundly defined the woman she had become."

My Thoughts:

Wow, just wow....I cannot even fathom what Zimmerman and her children have gone through. And I think it's quite brave of her to write about her life - and her ex-husband's death. I applaud her sharing this reality. Will their story help else realize someone in their life need help before it is too late? Maybe. Illegal drugs use is found everywhere regardless of gender, race, financial status or locale. Zimmerman inserts facts, figures and other interviews alongside Peter's story, painting a bigger picture.

Smacked is an eye opening and brutally honest memoir. It's heartbreaking to listen to, especially as children were so affected. This audiobook is so very personal, as Zimmerman herself reads the book. How can you really rate someone's life? Five stars for the telling and sharing. ( )

3.5 When Eileen finds the body of her ex-husband dead, she finds things she never expected. She had known Peter for 25 years, had two children with him, and because if this she was still very much in his life. She knew him as a work, success driven lawyer, but had noticed he was losing weight, missing key events, showing up late and looking generally sick and very tired. She never expected to find out he was using drugs and how extensive, all consuming that use would be.

An honest memoir, an enlightening one for some, since many of us think drug use is defined by a certain class. It's what we see on TV, read on line or in our local papers. Why would a successful and wealthy man let himself become so addicted to drugs that it cost hm his life? She had expected many things, even mental illness but not this. She set out to discover how prevalent this was in the white collared world.

Section three is about what she found. The reality and prevalence is startling. Stats and statistics from the corporate world, the tech world where pill popping is commonplace. Lawyers who suffer from extreme depression, even physicians who should know better but think they can manage their addictions. Millennials who use Adderall to maintain sharpness and focus. It's all here and if you have any interest in this subject this is good book to read as it combines memoir with cold, hard facts.

ARC from Netgalley. ( )