A number of musical misconceptions are explored and exploded in this humourous and lucid discussion of the relation between the human perception of music and traditional systems of music education. Drawing on his extensive background in the music world, the author marshals an informal yet rigorous logic to guide the reader through the practical experiences and careful thinking that led him to his conclusions. Updated and refined in the light of reader feedback and more recent thinking, nagging questions such as Why does formal musical training seem not to pertain to musical success? and Why is there such a dramatic disparity between what one is told about music and how one actually experiences it? are re-addressed. Seekers of musical truth stand to profit from this light-hearted assault on the more nebulous assumptions of the musical community.