A really appealing narrative voice. The novel takes place chronologically back and forth from the 80s when she was a kid. According to NYT rave from Helen Schulman, "her prime achievement in midlife seems to be successfully treading water without further emotional injury — and it is a hard-won stasis. A former art student, she said goodbye to all that when the going got rough. A former sexual libertine, she has gradually and willfully gained control over whom she goes to bed with. A reformed drug abuser and out-of-control drinker, Andrea arranges a date with a man she has met online and it goes about the way you’d expect. “Although there’s a certain pleasure I take in not being the one who drinks too much,” she says, “it’s only momentary, because I still have to contend with a drunk,” a line I found both sad and funny." Me, too, and, as they say, it resonated.
The part about the very ill niece didn't generate enough interest or empathy in me making the family parts a little forced, i.e. lunch with sister-in-law or some of the conversations with her mom. But I flew on through in the company of an appealing if confused narrator. Includes a trip to Seattle for a wedding. ( )

I adore Jami Attenberg's style but I felt that this plot left much to be desired.

Also this cover is just awful. ( )

Jami Attenberg redeems herself with this introspective joyful exercise. Jami uses her writing skills to overcome this plotless and fragmented book. ( )

I loved the prose of this. I was far more attached to the first half than the second half (though perhaps something is to be said for the books that keep one company during insomniac phases) but just loved the ways the characters were drawn and how it was ultimately about the one connection. Very well done. ( )

When I finished All Grown Up by Jami Attenberg,* I had this thought- people are either going to absolutely love this book, like super devotion to it, cult classic type love of this book OR people will absolutely hate this book and simply not get it. I think it might be that dividing line for readers of the book. Now stating that, I can say that I liked it, but a strong part of me didn't "get it." I got a strong "HBO Girls" type vibe off of this book and I don't get that show either, so I use that as a reference point.

The book is about Andrea, who is 39 and just about to turn 40. She is in a place in her life where she is comfortable where she is as a single woman living in NY. She has dad issues as she sleeps with many men trying to fill the space where her dad should be (her thoughts, not my analysis), often times not really into the sex or into the man she is with.

She struggles with abandonment from her mother who moved away, but seems to be having a fine life outside of NYC. Her mother is also demanding of Andrea as when she will have a baby and "grow up?"

Andrea though is in a place where she is content, but also wonders if she should be someone else at this point in her life. This is a sort of coming of age book as Andrea prepares to enter midlife. Is she fine with her life choices or is she just settling?

I turned 40 a few years ago and when I did, I had a career and have had it for 19 years at that point. I had a wife (still do) and had been married for a long time. I was not needy for my parents (even though I love them dearly). What I am saying is when I hit 40, I was in a place in my life where I wasn't seeking any longer, I knew who I was and was content with my life. So, I couldn't connect with Andrea's journey. Then again, I couldn't connect with a lot of people my age who I knew were still seeking who they were at 40.

The writing was great as Attenberg is a fantastic writer. The use of the first person narrative was an interesting choice I thought, especially in the opening where it is a pointed use of "you" before it slips into the "I" following.

I thought this was a fine book and I think a lot of people will connect with Andrea. It just didn't hit with me, but there was a lot in this tiny book. I gave this one 3.5 stars.

*I want to thank NetGalley for the advanced copy of this book. I received it in exchange for an honest review. ( )