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Bonnet Strings: An Amish Woman's Ties to Two Worlds

par Saloma Miller Furlong

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Biography & Autobiography. Nonfiction. HTML:

At age twenty, Saloma Miller left behind her Amish community in Burton, Ohio, and boarded a night train for Vermont, where she knew no one. In this poignant coming-of-age memoir, Saloma's new life of freedom includes work as a waitress and plans to continue her education. Romance also blossoms with a Yankee toymaker.

Soon, however, a vanload of people from her community, including the Amish bishop, arrive to take her back into the fold. Saloma's freedom comes to an abrupt end when she goes back home to Ohio with them. Thus begins a years-long struggle of feeling torn between two worlds: will she remain Amish and embrace the sense of belonging and community her Amish life offers, or will she return to the newfound freedom she tasted in Vermont?

Saloma settles into teaching in an Amish school and does her best to fit back into Amish ways, but a legacy of childhood abuse, struggles with an eating disorder, and questions of identity plague her. Her ties to the outside world remain, mostly through the quiet perseverance of the toymaker from Vermont. He keeps sending her cards, never giving up hope that their love could survive the strain of living in two different worlds.

Bonnet Strings by Saloma Miller Furlong offers a universal story of overcoming adversity and a rare look inside an Amish community. Readers of Amish fiction and viewers of the PBS documentaries such as The Amish and The Amish: Shunned will find in it a true story: of woundedness and healing, of doubt and faith, and of the often competing desires for freedom and belonging.

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This is the true story of a young Amish woman, Saloma Miller, who left behind her Amish community and her family in November 1977, at the age of 20, and boarded a train to Vermont, where she knew no one. Just as she was getting settled into a new life, a vanload of people from her community, including 2 of her siblings, arrived to bring her back to the fold. That was the beginning of an almost 3 year struggle of feeling torn between two worlds; should she remain Amish and stay in the community that she was use to, or return to the newfound freedom she had a taste of in Vermont?

While struggling to make a decision, she also has to deal with a legacy of childhood abuse, an eating disorder, and trying to decide whether or not she had a future within the Amish community.

This was a very fascinating read, and it is the sequel to her first book, Why I Left the Amish, which covers her childhood and teenage years, and what led up to her decision to leave her community for the first time. Bonnet Strings can be read as a stand alone story, but I highly recommend reading the Why I Left the Amish first, to have a better understanding of how her past affected the decisions she made when she was older.

Saloma's story was also featured in two PBS American Experience documentaries; The Amish, and The Amish: Shunned. If you are interested in the Amish, I recommend that you watch these documentaries if you ever get the chance. ( )
  mom2acat | Mar 26, 2015 |
When I read Bonnet Strings, I felt as if I’d been invited into the world of a young woman who was deeply conflicted about where she belonged. Saloma Miller was born into an Amish community in Ohio. As long as she could remember, she felt mismatched to the conservative, rigid practices of her community. She was labeled rebellious and stubborn.

The story begins when twenty-year-old Saloma prepares to find her place in the world. Her decision to leave her community is precipitated by her constant fear of her violent father. When her attempts to help her mother deal with an abusive situation and her mother refuses help and her community offers no support, Saloma makes a final decision to leave Ohio and start a new life in Burlington , Vermont.

As she journeys through her new life in a non-Amish world, she finds herself enjoying her hard-earned freedom and making new friends. She begins dating and meets a young man named David who becomes a trusted friend. But the pull to return to the Amish and her family eventually outweighs her desire to follow her heart and she ends up returning to the community on the condition that she not have to live with her parents.

Furlong’s writing is honest, engaging and refreshing. As a reader. I feel her inner turmoil as she grapples with her faith, her family, her friends and where she feels at home. I also admire her ability to persist in her efforts to know her own heart and follow her dreams.

Her decision to return to the community the second time ends up validating which direction she needs to take. She reaches a place of peace about who she is and where she belongs in the world.

I highly recommend Bonnet Strings as an enjoyable and enlightening read about a young woman’s struggle to find home. It is a heartwarming love story. ( )
1 voter kathleen.pooler | Apr 3, 2014 |
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Biography & Autobiography. Nonfiction. HTML:

At age twenty, Saloma Miller left behind her Amish community in Burton, Ohio, and boarded a night train for Vermont, where she knew no one. In this poignant coming-of-age memoir, Saloma's new life of freedom includes work as a waitress and plans to continue her education. Romance also blossoms with a Yankee toymaker.

Soon, however, a vanload of people from her community, including the Amish bishop, arrive to take her back into the fold. Saloma's freedom comes to an abrupt end when she goes back home to Ohio with them. Thus begins a years-long struggle of feeling torn between two worlds: will she remain Amish and embrace the sense of belonging and community her Amish life offers, or will she return to the newfound freedom she tasted in Vermont?

Saloma settles into teaching in an Amish school and does her best to fit back into Amish ways, but a legacy of childhood abuse, struggles with an eating disorder, and questions of identity plague her. Her ties to the outside world remain, mostly through the quiet perseverance of the toymaker from Vermont. He keeps sending her cards, never giving up hope that their love could survive the strain of living in two different worlds.

Bonnet Strings by Saloma Miller Furlong offers a universal story of overcoming adversity and a rare look inside an Amish community. Readers of Amish fiction and viewers of the PBS documentaries such as The Amish and The Amish: Shunned will find in it a true story: of woundedness and healing, of doubt and faith, and of the often competing desires for freedom and belonging.

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