This film is a lesson to the wise. Sometime in your life, accidentally or not, you may kill someone. So now, while you have plenty of time (I hope), you need to plan on how to dispose of the body. You'll need to have a primary method and at least one backup. For example, how long can you really count on an anchor to keep that body under the river? Maybe some rocks would help. And of course, you'll need to keep some sort of bag on hand for the body--some kind that won't rot in the water and come apart, exposing the--BODY!! You will want to hide this sack. Perhaps inside another sack. And PLEASE DON'T HAVE IT MONOGRAMMED! I know what you're thinking, but buying a wood chipper will look suspicious.

Why can't you appreciate your nice wife? She really wants to have a successful marriage, and even though she thinks your brother is a lot nicer than you are, all it will take is a few kind words to turn her around. Surely you can think of some. You're a writer!

Okay. Don't listen to me. Be crucified!

And, for god's sake, don't tell anyone your wife is having a baby when she isn't.

P.S. Curtains can be dangerous. ( )