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The Book of Eli

par Sam Moffie

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The Book of Eli by Sam Moffie (2010)
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The Book of Eli is a story that discusses religious and spiritual values and ethics in a humorous manner. It is the story of Eli's journey through Heaven as he meets a number of historical figures and discusses several questions of morality and humanity. An intriguing and interesting story. ( )
  chris227 | Oct 11, 2011 |
This review first appeared on my blog: http://jewelknits.blogspot.com/2010/11/book-of-eli-by-sam-moffie-blog-tourbook.h...

Eli Canaan, married to Abigail, is a good guy. He works, takes care of his family, and doesn't steal (much). As a matter of fact, the list of all of the good things he does takes two pages of the book.

But there is one thing that seems to trump all of the good things about Eli: he cheats on his wife ... a lot ... as a matter of fact, he may even be a sex addict.

Abigail knows about her philandering husband, and one day, tired of being cuckolded (yes, I use that for both men and women), she consults a gypsy for a spell to make her husband stay faithful.

Meanwhile, Eli is busy at the hotel with Mary, also married, yet still Eli's main side squeeze (they get together at least twice a week). While at the "climax" of their illicit meeting, Eli cries out and when he opens his eyes, he is in a different place.

The first voice he hears is that of Orson Wells, who clues him in on where he is. As we follow Eli around Heaven with his guide Julius AKA Groucho Marx, meeting figures as diverse as Ayn Rand and Freud, Eli figures out that he has been picked for a mission. He doesn't know what the mission IS, but he learns a lot about how Heaven really works through discussions with the people he visits. He also finds out that both God AND Jesus have a sense of humor, which is why they picked him for this mission.

I would describe this book as "smart satire", filled with one-liners delivered with zing, Eli's initial obsession with "screwing", and even some people who you wouldn't think would make it to heaven.

This book will not be everyone's cup of tea, but it is witty and unique and at times quite zany. I just kept picturing old-style comedians on stage, complete with hats and cigars, as I read it.

Writing Purists: This book could have used a bit more careful editing, as I noticed some typos, missing and misplaced punctuation, and a couple of syntax errors. It is not loaded down with these types of errors, however. The writing itself is good.

I always notice these in any book and if I see more than ten, I point it out in my review, because I am the kind of reader that gets "jarred out" of a story when I see them.

Sensitive Reader: Quite a few f-bombs and sexual content - this book is likely not for you.

QUOTES:

Eli sent a thought to the Almighty: I don't know what I have been chosen for, but can't you choose someone else? There is no way I am qualified for whatever it is you have chosen me for, unless it is going back to Earth to be a horny tomcat.

Eli was disappointed that Moses didn't look like Charlton Heston (so was Moses).

"But of course. Get in trouble and summon Ethan Allen," the Almighty mentioned.
"The furniture guy?" replied a surprised Eli.
"I see you were one of the ones asleep in history class," a disappointed God said to Eli.

(I received a complimentary copy of this title through Pump Up Your Book to facilitate my review) ( )
  jewelknits | Nov 22, 2010 |
Eli Canaan is a good man who tries to do all the right things like coaching his children and encouraging them, putting down the toilet seat after going to the bathroom and taking the garbage out without being asked. However, he does have one problem. He loves to have intercourse and not just with his wife, Abigail.

Abigail has decreed that she and Eli could have sex 2.5 times per month, since she read that and felt that was sufficient. This doesn't meet Eli's needs and when he continues to have sex elsewhere, Abigail finds a Gypsy and casts a spell on Eli about him never seeking out another woman.

Unfortunately, as the Gypsy tells her, "...be careful what you wish for."

Poor Eli is having the best sex ever with one of his partners and just at the pivotal moment he screams, "Oh God!" Then he wakes up in heaven.

He's confused and when he hears a voice that he assumes is God, he thinks it sounds like Orson Wells. Then he's corrected. The voice belongs to a cigar smoking person named Julius who is Eli's guide in heaven.

Julius takes Eli on a tour where he meets various celebrities like Groucho Marx.

In an amusing story, Julius and Eli talk of heaven and why there are no dogs or cats and about the long lines to meet other famous persons like Sartre and Descartes.

Later, Eli meets Freud and they discuss Eli's fixation with sex.

The story is very witty and as I read, I felt like I was reading one liners that could have been used by Don Rickles or Jerry Seinfield. ( )
  mikedraper | Sep 13, 2010 |
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