For as long as Homer had his stitches in and his cone on, he had to be kept separate from Scarlett and Vashti. The logistics involved in keeping them apart [...] were even more complicated in practice than they sounded in theory.
[...]
As the days went by, I began to feel like the philandering husband in a romantic French farce, with the constant opening and closing of bedroom doors and doing everything in my power to ensure that the wife and the girlfriend never ran into each other. (Chapter 5, "The New Kid," p. 56)

"Are you sure this is okay? I asked my mother. "I know you guys don't really like cats."

"We love you," my mother replied, "and you love the cats." Then she laughed and said, "Besides, if you think living with cats is the biggest sacrifice your father and I have made as parents, you don't know what being a parent means." (Chapter 7, "Gwen Doesn't Live Here Anymore," p.81)

I wish I could say that I thought these men were overacting their interest in Homer as a way of getting closer to me. Deep down, I suspected that, if anything, the opposite was the case. Many a crestfallen boyfriend over the years, upon being broken up with, would tremulously ask, "Does . . . does this mean I can't see Homer anymore?" (Chapter 16, "Cats and the Single Girl," p. 154)

We went on a few intense dates [...] when he abruptly cancel three dates in a row at the last minute. [...]

When I questioned this man about what was going on, he told me that his father had been an alcoholic, that the trauma of his childhood remained with him [...]

Following the logic of his argument, he was saying that it was okay to hurt me now (surely he must have known that standing me up three times would hurt my feelings) because, some twenty-odd years ago, somebody else had hurt him. It was bad behavior masquerading as self-knowledge. He saw himself as a man who'd made a brave confession, who'd been honest -- and honesty is an indisputable virtue. I saw someone who thought it was okay to transfer his pain onto others because it was easier than handling it himself. (Chapter 16, "Cats and the Single Girl," p.154- 155)

"This is a cat who knows how to live," Laurence said. "he's got this huge world in that little head, and you can tell just by looking at him that every second of every day of his life is an adventure. I only wish," he concluded. "that I could see what that cat hears." (Chapter 24, "Reader, I Married Him," p.283)