review of
Ed Wood, Jr.'s Death of a Transvestite
by tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE - January 25-26, 2019



WARNING: SOME QUOTES FROM THIS BOOK ARE EXPLICITLY VIOLENT IN WAYS THAT MIGHT BE TRAUMATIZING TO UNWORLDLY PEOPLE.

This is the sequel to Wood's Killer in Drag ( https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2688068842 ). The main character is a hit-(wo)man who dresses in drag both for the pleasure of it & for the surprise element in the killings. His/her name is Glen/da, as in Wood's movie Glen or Glenda. In Killer in Drag, Glen/da has tried to retire from the killer business but the police are after her/him for a murder s/he didn't commit. Death of a Transvestite begins w/ Glen/da on Death Row a few hrs before the impending execution. Glen/da asks for clothes to enable his/her death to happen in drag. In exchange, Glen/da offers to tell the hitherto hidden story of the fleeing & other circumstances that've climaxed in the eventual arrest & trial. The bk provides different POV (Point-Of-View) narratives that piece the whole story together — including that of the hit transvestite sent by the syndicate after Glen/da. There's not really any attempt to make these narratives in plausible voicings but I didn't find that this lack of realism effected the plot flow much — it was more of a glaring writing error. As w/ Wood's movies, suspension of disbelief isn't likely, but, unlike w/ Wood's films, it's not as distracting.

"We entered Glen Marker's cell, a bleak, cold arrangement of bars and solid cement, at seven-thirty p.m. It wasn't a pleasure visit, and even as we entered the cell Glen could be seen visibly shaken by the finality of our presence.

"The same situation hadn't happened in several years—that a man was to be executed in the State electric chair in our eastern city." - p 7

""A year ago I was so shot up it was a miracle anybody could put me back together again. All that patching just so I'd live to see the inside of your little green room. Wouldn't it have been better, and less expensive, to let me pass out of the scene while I was blacked out and going fast? All these doctors, the hospitals, the cops and courts, the extradition across the country . . . seems to me everything could have been so much more simple the other way."" - p 8

That got me to wondering: Are Execution Chambers generally green? I imagine a pale green. I found a picture online of one in Louisiana & it's off-white. I cd make a joke about offing whites but I won't. Instead, I'll ask: Are they following Rudolph Steiner's color symbolism? According to one website:

"‘Image of Life’ (Nature Plant Life). The Color of ‘Perfect Repose’. It’s effect is healing both for the mind and body. Green is the polar opposites neutralized. It neither advances nor retreats. In its blackened, negative form Green connotes extreme lethargy – an almost pathological stasis. Envy – jealousy." - http://www.baliartclasses.com/rudolf-steiner-colour-theory.html

""Is it true, after I'm strapped in and hooded—the second before you pull the switch— one of your men will smash my testicles?"" - p 9

Of course not, silly. After you're cooked the testicles are removed & flown by the fastest possible method to a secret meeting of shadow government people where they're eaten as dessert along w/ other similar delicacies. After they say Grace.

This & Killer in Drag are NOT Happy Ending bks. Lighten up, Ed.

"["]The foremost thought in any honest transvestite's mind is to die in female attire."

"My eyes flashed to the guards then back to Glen as he continued. "And to be buried in such clothes. That's my last request, Warden.["]" - p 14

Was Ed Wood, Jr. cremated in drag?

"We take exceptional notice of the fact that, on the tape, when Glen talks of Glenda he speaks of her in second person, but when he refers to Glen it is always with the first person I." - p 17

Wd Glen/da have survived in today's pronoun-obsessed world?

The majority of the novel is a 'reconstruction' along the lines of a flashback.

We all know about Mac & Cheese. How wd you feel if you went to your favorite bar only to learn that you cd no longer order Mac & Cheese there?

"So" [Cheese] "& Mac were dead. Glenda had been a Syndicate killer, but she held respect for the real law enforcement officers—after all, they had a job to do the same as Glenda did her job. But when a cop turned rotten, it turned her stomach." [Cheese] "and Mac were rotten to the core. Let them rot in hell. The world was better off without them... the bastards! Let them rot in HELL! Yet they'd probably go down in history as heroes, and be buried with all policemen's honors. And the ever-lovin' taxpayers would undoubtedly get stuck with paying somebody a persion for them for life. It's always happened that way. An honest guy gets kicked in the teeth and a rat gets fat. Glenda vowed to herself that she would write a letter, anonymous of course, divulging their true characters." - p 26

Glen/da starts hallucinating Mac & Cheese in pink satin panties, Mac & Cheese w/ a nightie on, Mac & Cheese w/ falsies. No wonder the bar stopped selling it, for some people it's worse than absinthe. After all, a Rose is a Rose is a prostitute named Red remembering sex w/ Glen/da, 2 professionals clinching the deal.

"His tongue found her breasts. One nipple then the other, back and forth with the suction of a windshield wiper in a heavy rainstorm. His tongue, his ever-pleasing hot tongue, found her navel. then the inside of her thighs. It was too much... this one really knew what he was doing." - p 35

I wonder where the rest of Glen/da's body was while her/his tongue was on its exploratory mission. If Glen/da doesn't watch out that tongue's going to become irretrievably lost in the dark interior. Imagine this scene done by Svankmajer. Ah, Rose, poor sweet Rose. Of course that maniac Ed Wood, Jr., has to kill her off in a horrible way. I can see the following scene in a film noir. Wood wood've never pulled it off.

""Did he say where he was going?"

""Yes."

"Barbara forced a smile as she turned back to face Rose. "Where was it?"" - p 42

The audience knows that Rose & Glen/da are going to be betrayed to the syndicate but Rose doesn't know. They stare transfixed in horror & dismay. The black & white is so sharp, the lighting so dramatic. Get out of there Rose! But she doesn't. & then the film goes color, blood RED.

"The red outfit—her red outfit. It could hasten all his plans. He didn't like Hollywood. He didn't like anything about it: the complete hassle to get out of the airport area; the stupid, even crazy drivers on the freeways; the accidents he witnessed even in his short duration on them. At least on the tollways in New York, the people had to stop their cars every so often to pay the toll fees. It kept them in line, kept their speed down. But that Sepulveda Freeway which eventually led to the Hollywood Freeway—that was too much!" - p 47

Isn't it bad enough that those corrupt contractors are always pretending to be working on those speedways when they're not really?! Do we also have to have toll roads just b/c the hit men have pet peeves?! The killer walked on down the hall.. & stamped his darling little high-heeled foot & demanded that something be done about those freeways!

The narrative's constructed as if from a variety of sources but little or no attempt is made to have the voices of these sources be realistic. Hence, "GLEN MARKER'S CONFESSION—TAPE" doesn't really seem like someone talking about their life in a Death Row cell shortly before they're executed. It's too literary, there's nothing speech-like about it:

"I turned my road-stained convertible onto the Hollywood Freeway as I criss-crossed off the San Bernardino Freeway. A long time before, early that morning just outside of Las Vegas, Nevada, Glenda had shed her white angora sweater and the blue velvet skirt for my brown suit, white shirt and brown tie.

"The Los Angeles green-gray smog with its light rotten-egg smell gtreeted my sense of smell just after I had left San Bernardino, and by the time I reached Pomona it had further become an eye-stinging mess. A sudden spring heat-wave mixed with the fact of practically no rain and not the slightest breeze, kept the lung-choking smog in thick clouds." - p 50

Still, as I noted earlier, this lack of versimilitude didn't really bother me, the story still moves along.

The 2nd killer-in-drag, the one sent by the Syndicate to find & kill Glen/da, has their early homicidal history disclosed in ostensible diary form:

"However, as he raped this unconscious girl, something did pierce his skin. It was a feeling, a strange sensation which he paused in his action to analyse. Then he knew what it was. The girl wore a fuzzy, brushed wool sweater which was buttoned up the front. It seemed to move against his skin with a sexual stimulation he had never experienced before. To be sure, very sure, he let his hands slowly caress the softness of the garment to the point where her breasts stretched the wool so invitingly. Then he was sure. The electricity of the sensation shot through to his groin. He could hardly contain himself as his nervous, shaking hands unbuttoned the fur-like sweater and took it from her body. Just as shakily he put it slowly onto his own body and the ecstasy of the moment as he buttoned it up caught a craving within him so intense he nearly exploded before he could get back with the girl and complete his climax the way he always had before. She died with her throat cut, but it was the start of a collection for the Killer." - p 60

Meanwhile, back at the ranch dressing, Glen has gone to the home of a woman for sex. When she discovers that he has on women's underclothing she concludes that he's gay & gets frustrated by having her sexual fantasy go awry:

"She waved her hands in frustration as she walked back to her bar and poured another straight shot. "All night I thought about you. I've had it with guys like last night. I sure expected something out of you." She laughed. "And there you stand in your panties. Man oh man, am I about ready for the rubber room at the happy farm!"" - p 116

That, too, is presented as from the CONFESSION TAPE. The equally implausible language of the continuation of this is credited to the woman he then has sex w/:

"L.A. POLICE INTERVIEW #999—CYNTHIA HARLAND

"Glenda reached up to pull her head down again, but the kiss was short-lived. Cynthia put her arm around Glenda's waist and led her into the bedroom where, a moment later, she had adjusted a blonde wig to Glenda's head then stood back breathing in eager anticipation.

"No matter what Glenda looked like in drag, she was strong." - p 121

Back to Glen's POV:

"The girl weaved slowly on the bed like a snake in heat, with little moaning sounds coming from her lips. They were both tired from the first jousting, but not so tired that the sensations of renewed life were not forthcoming." - p 124

I'm particularly fond of the phrase "The girl weaved slowly on the bed like a snake in heat".

"When a female snake is ready to mate, she begins to release a special scent (pheromones) from skin glands on her back. As she goes about her daily routine, she leaves an odor trail as she pushes off resistance points on the ground (See Getting Around). If a sexually mature male catches her scent, he will follow her trail until he finds her. The male snake begins to court the female by bumping his chin on the back of her head and crawling over her. When she is willing, she raises her tail. At that point, he wraps his tail around hers so the bottoms of their tails meet at the cloaca -- the exit point for waste and reproductive fluid. The male inserts his two sex organs, the hemipenes, which then extend and release sperm. Snake sex usually takes under an hour, but it can last as long as a whole day." - https://animals.howstuffworks.com/snakes/snake5.htm

It's probably realistic to say that Glen/da followed Cynthia's snake-like pheremone trail to her home.

This bk was originally published in 1967. I don't know how much earlier than that it was written. Wood's still referring to countercultural people as "beatniks" so, apparently, the word "hippie" hadn't caught on for him yet.

"Dirty clothes. Long hair. Sweaters that even the Salvation Army wouldn't accept."

[..]

""This LSD craze is going to cause us a lot of trouble. It's going to put a lot of those kids in the cemetery."" - p 128

"["]There is much more to it than a few pushers trying to get the kids hooked. Most of those kids don't have the cash for their espresso, let alone lay out the kind of cash the stuff costs."" - p 129

Squaresville, Daddio. I wdn't describe anyone selling LSD as a "pusher". Also, LSD was very cheap back in the day. I have no idea what it costs now. Prices get inflated when legal penalties become Draconian & people dealing LSD are taking ridiculous risks of long-term imprisonment for promoting consciousness expansion. Anyone in prison for selling LSD shd be released immediately & given a pension.

A subplot of Death of a Transvestite is that the Sunset Strip is being infiltrated by LSD-fueled riot-hungry beatniks. Here's the 'police perspective':

""You have a sap?"

""Lined in along the back of my belt."

""Get it clear. Put it in your side pocket where you can get at it mighty damned quick. You might have to crack some skulls before they can crack yours." His eyes narrowed as he looked across the street to another bunch who were ambling around the corner of Laurel Canyon to enter upon the Sunset Strip. "Those are pros. They know what it's all about. When things start it's not going to be easy." Terry looked ahead to the almost bumper to bumper traffic. "Another smart move. They're moving in the heavy line of defense; the vehicle traffic, bumper to bumper so out boys can't get their squad cars through in a hurry."" - p 149

I'd call that a rather paranoid perspective.

I think that the 2 Wood novels I've read so far have 'their place in literary history' — by wch I mean that they have enuf distinguishing characteristics to make them not utter pot-boilers. I wdn't really recommend them but I wdn't write them off either. He's reputed to've written "at least 80 lurid crime and sex novels in addition to hundreds of short stories and non-fiction pieces for magazines and daily newspapers. Thirty-two stories known to be written by Wood (he sometimes wrote under pseudonyms such as "Ann Gora" and "Dr. T.K. Peters") are collected in Blood Splatters Quickly, published by OR Books in 2014." ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Wood#Books_and_novels ) I'd be interested in a collection of everything he wrote for magazines and newspapers — esp anything that gets away from his drag obsession. I've got nothing against drag but other people's obsessions aren't nearly as fun for the reader (at least not for me) as they are for the obsessed person writing them. ( )