Book on CD read by Jeff Woodman

Hodgman’s elderly mother was clearly in trouble. He had lost one job and had the time to spend with her back home in Missouri. His work as an editor allowed him to continue “remotely” while he shepherded his mother along a path neither of them wanted to take. In this memoir he relates not only their fractious journey together, but the many incidents in their backgrounds that brought them to this place.

I found this tender and funny, heartbreaking and hopeful. There were times when I wanted to slap him (or Betty) upside the head and force one or both of them to face reality. There were times when I wanted to just wrap them in a blanket and give them little “now, now and there, there” comforting pats. I was reminded of the many trips I took to Texas to help my parents as they faced these same demons: of aging, of loss of independence, of loss of control, of loss of identity.

This snippet describes perfectly the relationship I had with my mother during the earlier stages of her disease process: I know she hates me sometimes. how could she not? I am the guard at the prison she will never get out of. Sometimes I am just as pent-up and angry. I loathe her too. Just a typical American family, torn between love and homicide, but united in our way.

Not that you need my opinion, George, but you did the right thing. Always.

The audiobook was masterfully performed by Jeff Woodman. ( )

Poignant and laugh out loud funny at times, this memoir of a sophisticated Manhattan gay writer who returns to his little hometown in Missouri to care for his irascible mother with dementia is beautifully written.It is a caregiver tale, but the undercurrent of a son whose gayness has never been accepted by his mother makes the story that much more gripping. ( )

How I wish I could write as beautifully as the author. This is his story of his commitment to his 91 year old mother. George moves from a life in Manhattan, NY to care for his mother in small town Missouri. This is the tale of adjustment to living with his cantankerous mother who daily presents challenges for patience.

She is a character in every way. She is forward, kind, resilient, overbearing, sneaky, and loving, always loving!

She insists on wearing mismatched clothing while she demands to keep her well-worn sandals on her feet. A beautiful woman when young, like all who grow older, the wrinkles deepen while her spirit remains steadfast.

George calmly deals with her slide into forgetfulness, while admiring her stamina to undergo chemo for her cancer.

The town is small, but the beauty is large.

This excellently written, heart-felt homage to a mother who raised and loved her gay son is stunningly, beautifully embraced with crystal sharpness, and each page contains a tear and a smile. They grow together in acceptance of each other that calls forth as the days slip away.

Read this one. I don't think you will be disappointed!

Five Stars ( )

"Bettyville", a beautifully-written memoir from author George Hodgman, will gently break places in your heart, and then it will tenderly patch them back together with warmth and humor. George Hodgman becomes the care provider for his elderly mother, Betty, leaving his life in Manhattan behind and returning to his home town of Paris, Missouri. Having reached the age of ninety-something by living in her own indomitable manner, Betty will not go quietly into old-age oblivion. As issues such as dementia, cancer, and increasing physical frailty creep into the picture, Betty remains a force to be reckoned with. At the age of ninety-one, she chooses to fight her cancer, and begins radiation therapy. Throughout all of their rumblings and grumblings while reconnecting and acclimating to once again living in the same house, it becomes clear that there is a great love between mother and son. Seeing Betty struggle, yet refuse to surrender her spirit, leads George to discover his own personal strengths and gives him the courage to move forward with choices for his future. My own mother's name was Betty, and while our life situation was quite different from George and his mother, much of our circumstances were similar. While George left home and then came back, I stayed with my mother for almost fifty years. My Betty and I were separated only when she passed away. George and his Betty remain together. "Bettyville" is keenly-observed, poignant, and written with great heart. A recommended read for caregivers, but also for those who receive the care.

Book Copy Gratis Amazon Vine ( )

I came to love Betty. I don't often say that about a character - although in this case being that it's a memoir - much less about a person I've never met. But it's true. Despite George's struggles, his care and the love he has for his mother shines through with his brilliant writing. ( )