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Chargement... Missing Out: In Praise of the Unlived Life (2012)par Adam Phillips
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Inscrivez-vous à LibraryThing pour découvrir si vous aimerez ce livre Actuellement, il n'y a pas de discussions au sujet de ce livre. Adam Phillips gets it, which means, whatever else it means, that he often doesn't. One is reminded here of the message of Viktor Frankl and Brene Brown - that the key to psychological integration is to locate the origin of our happiness in our unhappiness. One key difference between Phillips and these others, of course, is that Phillips is a practitioner, while the other two are thinkers. As a result, Phillips doesn't give us the answer directly, knowing as he does, as we do, that the only true way for us to change is if we lead and experience the change ourselves. His lyrical poetic style opens questions and slips nuggets of wisdom through, undetected right under our noses, leaving us with our own internal dialogues and wishing us well to find our own way there. A tour de force. https://msarki.tumblr.com/post/154055211413/missing-out-in-praise-of-the-unlived... …In my version of strong reading , the strong reader is trying to rediscover what he hates, and he is looking for clues about how he can get out of it. The title alone is reason enough to read this interesting elegy. But unfortunately, drawing from the works by [a:William Shakespeare|947|William Shakespeare|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1424313573p2/947.jpg], [a:Sigmund Freud|10017|Sigmund Freud|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1406688955p2/10017.jpg], [a:Henry James|159|Henry James|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1468309415p2/159.jpg], and Winnicott failed to buy me out, even though the liberal offerings regarding the clinical experience of Adam Phillips did provide enough grist for me to chew on religiously. As with any book of substance there were quotes aplenty for my pen to pilfer from his text. And in many cases the author’s own words are more sufficient and worthy than any lousy review. Without frustration there can be no satisfaction. Frustration that is unrecognized, unrepresented, cannot be met or even acknowledged; addiction is always an addiction to frustration (addiction is unformulated frustration, frustration too simply met). Thought is what makes frustration bearable, and frustration makes thought possible. Thinking modifies frustration, rather than evading it, by being a means by which we can go from feeling frustrated to figuring out what to do about it, and doing it; what Freud called ‘trial action in thought’ — and what we might call imagination — leading to real action in reality…thinking is the link, the bridge, and not an end in itself…failures of imagination would be the unwillingness to bear with frustration…And reality matters because it is the only thing that can satisfy us…But the quest for satisfaction begins and ends with frustration; it is prompted by frustration, by the dawning of need, and it ends with the frustration of never getting exactly what one wanted… How do you know what your desire is? It is that which makes you feel guilty when you betray it; not when when you betray someone else, but when you betray yourself; indeed, for Lacan self-betrayal, the self-betrayal of giving up on one’s desire, is the source of guilt. We suffer from failures of ruthlessness…There is no satisfaction without an initiating frustration; and so there is no satisfaction that is not preceded — and to some extent pre-empted — by a wished-for fantasy of satisfaction… aucune critique | ajouter une critique
A transformative book about the lives we wish we had and what they can teach us about who we are All of us lead two parallel lives: the one we are actively living, and the one we feel we should have had or might yet have. As hard as we try to exist in the moment, the unlived life is an inescapable presence, a shadow at our heels. And this itself can become the story of our lives: an elegy to unmet needs and sacrificed desires. We become haunted by the myth of our own potential, of what we have in ourselves to be or to do. And this can make of our lives a perpetual falling-short. But what happens if we remove the idea of failure from the equation? With his flair for graceful paradox, the acclaimed psychoanalyst Adam Phillips suggests that if we accept frustration as a way of outlining what we really want, satisfaction suddenly becomes possible. To crave a life without frustration is to crave a life without the potential to identify and accomplish our desires. In this elegant, compassionate, and absorbing book, Phillips draws deeply on his own clinical experience as well as on the works of Shakespeare and Freud, of D. W. Winnicott and William James, to suggest that frustration, not getting it, and and getting away with it are all chapters in our unlived lives--and may be essential to the one fully lived. Aucune description trouvée dans une bibliothèque |
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Google Books — Chargement... GenresClassification décimale de Melvil (CDD)155.2Philosophy and Psychology Psychology Developmental And Differential Psychology Individual PsychologyClassification de la Bibliothèque du CongrèsÉvaluationMoyenne:
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And if you enjoy the frustration of being teased with implication, without the satisfaction of being fed with understanding, then this is the book for you. However, while the language sparkles, there's something missing - an original idea? significance? integrity? lived experience? It's hard to tell when you're blinded with so much rhetorical bling.
Still, there are useful nuggets here, albeit some sifted from other authors. Take for example his quotation of Franz Kafka's striking observation from Zurau Aphorisms:
'You can withdraw from the sufferings of the world - that possibility is open to you and accords with your nature - but perhaps that withdrawal is the only suffering you might be able to avoid.'
There's a writer with a life, not just a keyboard. ( )