The Ninth Circle

I'm leaving DC after more than 20 years and have bought a house in Lynchburg, Virginia just behind the Villa Maria. My little house was built in 1956 on land the Krise family sold to developers and wouldn't qualify as a porter's lodge, but it's nice to tell people 'turn left at the big house on the hill and there you are!' I live on Krise Circle.

I'm moving from an apartment to a place that has a bird feeders, flowers I don't know the name of, and a shed built like a red barn complete with weather vane.

I'm going to write about my experiences opening up the house and the books I read along the way. Hopefully more than a few I'll read out in the yard.

And so it begins.

I grow lots of flowers I don't know the names of!

Hey MarthaJeanne! I like that neither one of us is trying to hard, we're not plant helicopter parents!

Names are useful if you need to look a new plant up to see where it might be comfortable in the garden, or what parts you might want to use in the kitchen, But if it's growing well by itself, and I don't want to eat it, I don't need the name.

If you mostly live in one place, names aren't too complicated, but I find that besides the latin name, which is usually, but not always stable, I need an English name and a German name, but lots of non-showy flowers have different names in the US and the UK, and maybe regional variants, and the same with Austria/Switzerland/Germany. And certain variants might refer to a different flower somewhere else. As I said above, I don't always need a name.

My cat's name is Parker but lately I've been calling him Brother Fluffy. I closed on the house but haven't moved anything in because I'm having the interior painted. I did buy a bed and a couple of chairs from the old owners so I'd have some place to sit and sleep as I transition down there.

I closed a the house and brought Brother with me, and he flipped out. I guess it was the void-like quality of an empty house. Poor little guy; we were there for 5 days and the only time he'd come from out beneath the covers on my bed was long after nightfall. I've never seen him so frightened, even at the vets.

Here he is right after I let him out of the carrier on the first day. He's just a few minutes into a panic attack.

He needs more places to hide. Get a few cartons from a grocery store and set them up with the open side near a wall.

Hurray! I’m so excited for you! And the first pic is such a tease. Parker will be fine. How are you freaking out?

And tell us about paint colors

>6 MarthaJeanne: I'm not going to bring him down here anymore until the big move. It was heartbreaking to see him so upset all the time and for days. But Ruth is right, he will be fine especially when all my furniture is down here and it's got a stank on it.

>7 2wonderY: Ruth, I might have on rose-colored glasses but I really love my neighborhood, and my house, and I'm really starting to groove on Lynchburg. That being said, I do occasionally just flip right out and feel that I'm through the looking glass.

Okay, the paint colors. I should say right up front that I like dark, moody interiors and this house gets tons of light so I think the interior can handle darker colors. Still, I'll be the first to admit that the colors I chose are a little Severous Snape.

Here goes. I'm painting the ceiling in the dining room a metallic gold color. Above the chair rail I'm going to put up chinoiserie wallpaper that has a black background. And below the chair rail I'm going to paint the walls black. I'm going to put down a jewel tone red Afghani rug and everything will be fabulous.

The living room I'm painting Polo blue, which is the color that Ralph Lauren uses on all his boxes and bags. It's a deep navy with a lot of black.

In the master bedroom I'm splurging and using Farrow and Ball's Hague blue for both the walls and the ceiling. The office gets Black Forest green and, to mix things up, the guest room will be a light Robin's egg blue.

Wow! Dramatic. I think I’ve seen glimpses of your apartment decor in the past along these lines as well.

I’m hoping you have more to report! I saw on another thread you are in countdown mode - 11 days now? Is that the big move? But Shirley, you can share progress and state of mind?

I've taken a few much needed days off from prepping, and don't call me Shirley. I found myself not sleeping at night, looking at couches online until 4:30 or 5:00 a.m. and then waking up at 7:30 a.m. I finally came down with a bug and, because I ran a 1° fever Friday night, I had to go get the Covid test. I can tell right now that I don't have Covid but if I didn't clear myself I'd feel like Typhoid Larry for the next couple of weeks with all the people I'll be around.

The painting's done and the only color that I regret is the Black Forest Green in the second bedroom. Unless it's in direct sunlight it really does read as black. And the painter has gotten mulesh about the metallic paint on the ceiling in the dining room and I'm going to really have to baby him along or I think he'll just walk. I told him that that metallic paint was a real pain in the behind and although the ceiling is only 14 by 14 it would take him all day to paint it. If you don't do it right you get lines from the roller. And he hasn't done it right. The reason that I think that I'm going to have to baby him along is he's asked me to bring the final payment in cash the next time I'm in town, so I can't imagine him taking the money and then sticking around to finish a job that he clearly does not want to do.

March 3rd is packing day and March 4th is unpacking day in Lynchburg. I've hired a moving company so I'm just going to sit around and tell people where to shove things. So it'll be a lot like riding the subway, really.

I don't know, maybe today just hasn't been my day. FedEx delivered a new carpet to me here in Alexandria and I went through the entire apartment building and couldn't find it anywhere. Sometimes they deliver to the wrong building and the item turns up in a few days.

But home ownership, baby! The big home-oh! I splurged and bought a Chippendale low boy and an antique rocking horse. This Thursday I'm going to load up a U-Haul truck full of fragiles and pick them up on my way to Lynchburg, and come back on Friday. The low boy I'm going to put next to the dark blue walls in the living room. I was going to put the rocking horse on a credenza in the dining room but, one I don't have a credenza and, two the base is probably 20" wide so if I did get a credenza it would have to be ginormous. I don't know, put it on the dining room table as a centerpiece? It's pretty cool in that sad, creepy way that all old rocking horses are. I wonder what makes old rocking horses so creepy?

I did get a lot done to the house when I was down there a week and a half ago. I had two couches delivered, got internet installed, a security system, and had firewood delivered and the chimneys checked out. I am so looking forward to lighting a fire the next time I'm down there! God I do love a fireplace.

So sorry you’ve been feeling punky. It’s all the excitement, yeah? You and Parker both. But oh my! You’ve been having such fun choosing pieces. And obsessing. I know you’ll get the paint issues ironed out. Though it sounds like you may have to do that ceiling right yourself.
Dang! A working fireplace! Sigh.

It is fun except for the exhaustion part. And if you don't have a fireplace I heartily recommend burning down a neighbor's house. Fires are lovely!

I just got my covid test results and they were negative, as I knew they would be. But I do feel better now about things. I may still take tomorrow off, doing nothing all day today was really kind of awesome.

Here's the dining room with the metallic gold ceiling. It doesn't pop because there is no sunshine. More pics later. The walls are black. I'm going to have chinoiserie wallpaper with a black background installed above the chair rail.

The bust in the corner is supposed to be JFK but looks nothing like him. It does look remarkably like my Dad.

This is the wallpaper.

That’s going to be stunning!! Thanks for the pictures! Wow! Just WOW!

Larry! Thanks for letting me know that you've set up a whole remodeling thread, because I. Am. In!
Your dining room is beautiful, I love it. I have a chandelier in mine too, but my bust (Apollo, that I had the nerve to paint metallic gold) is in the living room. Do not tell me that you also have a stack of Southern Living magazines on the coffee table. Do not tell me!
>15 SomeGuyInVirginia: That is gorgeous wallpaper!

>17 mstrust: I was wondering when he’d put the word out. More fun!

>14 SomeGuyInVirginia: I like that you chose old gold for the ceiling instead of newvo riche.

I didn't own a couch, and then there was Amazon and now I own two. The original plan was to have the super comfy white couch in the basement and the formal leather couch stay where it is in the living room. But I'm not sure that the white couch, which is oversized, is going to fit through any of the interior doors in the basement. If the movers can get it through the doors on Thursday, fine. If not, I'll switch and keep the white couch in the living room and move the leather couch downstairs.

I'm not a white couch kind of guy, but my options were pretty limited by the few colors that Amazon offered. I've already got a scuff on the white couch from my slippers. I imagine I'll be buying a different color in about a year.

This picture shows the living room the way that I left it on Saturday morning, and the way I'll see it tomorrow night when I get there ahead of the movers. I have to pass by Covesville antiques to get to Lynchburg. They price things to move, and add to that the antiques market being severely depressed, and suddenly it makes sense to skip IKEA and buy that Regency sideboard for the same price. Not that I'm that pragmatic. I bought the Victorian rocking horse that you can just see the head of on the right of the picture, the 19th century Chippendale lowboy supporting what may well be the biggest damn table lamp in the universe, and the George III kettle stand supporting the echo studio you can just barely see on the left of the picture.

I got the early American candle stand by the head of the white couch at their sister store, Tuckahoe antiques, which is about 15 mi away. Same premise, price things to move, but Tuckahoe antiques deals and higher-end merchandise. It's where I'm going to get a new dining table when I find one.

The wall color is a dark stoney blue.

>16 2wonderY: >18 2wonderY: Thanks Ruth! Although, truth to tell, I went for the shiniest gold color they offered. I really wanted the ceiling to pop.

>17 mstrust: Jennifer! I'm really glad you're here! I love the idea of a gold painted Apollo. Pics or it didn't happen. No Southern Living magazines, but I do have their all things biscuits cookbook in the kitchen.

Tonight will be my last night in this apartment. I'm really going to miss the view. That's the Potomac River and on the other side is National Harbor.

Oh my God, everything is sideways there?! How do you stay on the couch?

Ta-da! Fixed it!

>21 SomeGuyInVirginia: That is stunning and well worth the rent.

>19 SomeGuyInVirginia: I approve of everything. Hey, Larry has class! One detail, though. Beer cans don’t belong on the mantel. We'll overlook it this time; assuming the goblets and straws hadn’t been unpacked yet.

>24 2wonderY: Of course they belong on the mantle! That way when the EMTs show up they know exactly how much you've had to drink.

My last night in this apartment, with the view of the river and the moon and the ferris wheel at National harbor. I'll miss it.

Today is loading everything on a truck day.

Best wishes of the day! Will they unpack today?

>21 SomeGuyInVirginia: >26 SomeGuyInVirginia: That's an amazing view and you will certainly miss it. But I'll bet your new place has a beautiful view also.
Good luck today, I hope everything goes smoothly. Will you be settled in Lynchburg tonight?

>28 2wonderY: >29 mstrust: Tomorrow is unpacking day. Today I just tossed the keys to the movers and told them that I would see them tomorrow, so I'm in Lynchburg now and they'll be here about 11:00 tomorrow morning. Bless their hearts they wiped my apartment down for me after they moved everything out. I used Beltway Movers and I really like them, and I especially like Ali who is the foreman on this move and on two of my previous moves. He's a great guy and a super hard worker.

Parker was upset when he got here but now there's a few sticks of furniture so I didn't find them curled up in a fetal position behind the toilet, like I did last time. He's still hiding underneath the covers and I don't know whether I should go and pull him out or just let him stay until he's ready to come out. I've moved his food into the room and his kitty litter. On second thought he may just be playing me. Nah.

So Brother Fluffy and I are in Lynchburg. This will be full time.

One super awesome thing about living in a house is that I can order food or grocery delivery and not have to deal with a recalcitrant delivery person who refuses to get out of their car so I have to put on pants and shoes like a normal person and go to the lobby. If I wanted to put on pants and shoes I would have gone to the store myself. Here I pick up the phone and 45 minutes later whatever it is magically appears on my doorstep.

It's getting close to being a completed move! Hooray for pants-free days!

So, you have a front walk and a basement now. What else is uniquely new to you and how’re you feeling?

I have a circular driveway! Actually it's kind of a cheat, I live on a corner lot so the driveway hits the two street sides. But circular driveways are a thing in Lynchburg, just like fire pits, barking dogs, and affirmation prints on the walls. They are practically ubiquitous.

Guess who has gotten over their initial fears and is now meowing his head off in every.damn.echoy.room of the house.

Oh, good! Just in time to be freaked out by the movers activity today.

Yeah, it will set him back some for sure. There will be three or four of them here today. Man I am so looking forward to having all my stuff in one place. Plus, PLUS, this week be the first time in almost 20 years the Traveling Library and the Collection will be under the same roof. And then I will be invincible! Bwahahaha!

It has begun! The first box from the Collection, I feel like Carter opening Tut's tomb.

I knew it, 20 years ago my reading tastes where soooo much better.

Are you sure that one on top wasn’t borrowed from my library? My copy has been missing for ...oh, about 20 years...

Could be, rabbit, how much is it worth to you?

You know why my reading taste were so much better 20 years ago? Because 20 years ago, when I was looking for books to buy, I was standing in a physical bookstore.

Living in a house, on the ground, is giving me the willies. For years I've been living in a high-rise and I never had to worry about foot traffic or somebody coming in through the window.

Man, I have seen way too many zombie movies.

Every morning you wake up whole is a celebration!

Oh, you'll be experiencing the joys of canvassers in no time, those people who ring your bell to sell you candy, home improvement, landscaping and religion!
And now you won't have to worry about annoying the neighbors below with your keggers.

Gah, I've come down with a bug. I'm surprised it took this long, I always get sick when I get stressed out. I'mma order lunch in and read in bed until tomorrow.

Good plan! But then you must tell us
https://www.librarything.com/topic/319448#

>45 SomeGuyInVirginia: An excellent plan. Have Parker curl around your head to keep you warm. Like a Daniel Boone cap.

Congrats on the new digs! I love both DC and Lynchburg. I have a friend that lives in Springfield, Virginia, and we visit a couple of times per year. One year she took me to Lynchburg (where her son went to college) and we visited a wonderful Pizza Shop near Lynchburg campus. We stayed in a boutique type hotel, the Craddock Terry Hotel, which used to be a shoe factory. It had a great gift shop! We visited Red Hill (?), Patrick Henry's home before he became Virginia's governor. The property supposedly has the oldest known Osage orange tree in the U.S. Then we took a drive to Bedford to see the D-Day memorial. Between that and the wonderful antique fair that was going on in Lynchburg that weekend and the great restaurants (Isabella's), it was a fantastic, too short weekend!

I’m now getting confused between our threads. Your front porch too small for a rocker. Okay, but have you decorated yet with a plant or a totem pole?
Reminder: PICTURES!

T insists on being outside now; I wonder why. So I put her tiny folding chair on the front porch for her and I sat on the step and chopped veggies and all the neighbors were outside too.

>46 2wonderY: >49 2wonderY: Ha! I'll tell you what's outside my window. Beasts! I got up yesterday morning at 5:45 a.m. because, why not, and sat on the couch while Parker proceeded to pitch a fit from his perch looking out over the backyard. I got up to see what the ruckus was and a huge cat was on the other side of the window and apparently that cat and Parker were having a grand old time telling each other they were going to kick each other's ass. Other cats saw me and scampered, but about 15 minutes later I see what I very quickly determined is not a large dog with frequently long legs but is, in fact, a deer poking around the bird bath. Parker has been ecstatic. Apparently this goes on every morning and is what I now call Cat TV.

I don't do plants, even fake plants for the irony. No plants. Newp. That's like keeping a pet hamster that's in a coma.

I do have totem poles though. No kidding, I collect New Guinea tribal art. I also want to get a zombie garden gnome but I have to determine whether this is a kind of neighborhood where zombie garden gnomes go wandering or not. I'd say not, especially in the backyard.

>47 mstrust: Parker is black as night, so when he does sit on my head I just look like the angry one of the Three Stooges.

>48 Tess_W: Hi Tess, welcome! I find that I already miss DC and I imagine that will only become sharper as time goes by. But you're right, there are a ton of things to do in this area. This place is also a clearing house for antique furniture, you can pick great stuff up for a song.

Did you ever go to the antique fair in Abingdon Virginia, held in August? I've been going to that since I was a kid, back when it was held behind the Martha Washington Inn. I'm hoping it's still going on and that they'll hold it this August. August seems like an odd time to hold a fair, but the weather is generally really temperate at that elevation. I mean, it gets hot but not so hot it will drive you away.

I've been unpacking stuff all day and even the bottom of my feet ache. If I can stand the excitement I'm going to try to light my first fire in the basement and see if the flu draws or not.

Fire hoses at the ready!

>50 SomeGuyInVirginia: That antique fair sounds wonderful. I use to go to them as a kid with my Mom, but those were California "antiques" which meant a lot of stuff that was ten years old.

>52 mstrust: Ha! The infamous collectibles market. If you like antique furniture this is the time to buy it, since the bottom has fallen out of the market and brown furniture is going for a fraction of what it went for 20 years ago. I bought a ton of stuff recently and paid no more than junk store prices. The most expensive thing I just bought was a Jacobean chest of drawers, and even that didn't cost more than the same kind of thing from a decent furniture store. I know the reason it was so cheap is because the wood has shrunk over the centuries, so there's a 2" gap between two boards on the top of the chest. But I think that just adds to the charm actually.

I met a new neighbor today, and she pointed out that the tree in the backyard that I just barely noticed is actually a fig tree, and that bush growing by the side door is rosemary.

I lit a fire in the basement today! At first, I couldn't get anything going with just paper and firewood, so I went to Home Depot and got some Tumbleweeds, which are just shredded pine mixed with paraffin and formed into a roll the size of an egg roll. Gets that hardwood burning though!

Tomorrow is bulk trash day and I've got to haul all kinds of crap out of this house for the city to pick up.

Oh, look! Plants! How big is the fig tree? We just planted saplings last year.

Your timing is exquisite. Bulk trash day comes around infrequently. But take the opportunity to curb shop. I once furnished an entire apartment that way.

Outdoor plants don't count! The fig tree's... 12 ft tall? Rosemary's 5 ft 2, eyes of blue (but oh, what those five foot could do).

You can find some really cool stuff in people's trash. Last week the old couple across the street from me set out an ancient vacuum, it looked very retro with all chrome and aerodynamically rounded corners. The second I noticed it from my living room, somebody on the street stopped their car, jumped out and grabbed it. I think curb shopping is a thing in Lynchburg. I've been buying furniture lately because I need furniture. One thing I don't need is stuff to set on shelves and dust. I'm going to be editing the collection this summer on craigslist and Facebook marketplace.

Parker must have successfully defended the fort against alien invaders this morning, because he's running from one end of the house to the other like his tail is on fire. I'm pretty sure his tail isn't actually on fire. Once my caffeine kicks in I'll check.

Unfortunately, in Phoenix, actual antiques are thin on the ground. People who owned the good stuff don't bring it with them when they move here, instead leaving them behind with family. I could give you multiple locations to buy 12 ft tall metal dinosaur sculptures though.
You have a fig tree! Now you can make cookies and tarts.

>56 mstrust: I have enough antiques, but I don't have any 12 foot metal dinosaurs! I think I need one :)

Me, much too lazy to get off the couch for a better shot, enjoying a fire on my cold, rainy day off.

Sweet! Any pictures appreciated.

The couch in the basement is both very comfortable and very low to the ground, so the first thing I do is flop down on my back. Getting out of the damn thing is a process, and I usually lay there for the first 10 seconds rocking back and forth and waving my arms and legs around like a turtle that's been flipped over on its back, trying to right myself so I can get up. The cat thinks it's funny.

The last of the furniture will be delivered today, other than a cheapy office desk I need to pick out. Right now I'm looking at a metal monstrosity from Costco. I'm also going to have the movers stay for a couple of hours and help me rearrange furniture.

Like I said, the bottom has fallen out of the market for antique brown furniture so I was able to pick up a Beidermier-like dresser and a second Jacobian-era dresser for a song. I say Beidermier-like because Beidermier is the closest style I can think of to it, but it differs in that the form and hardware are more reminiscent of federal-era furniture made in the US between 1780 and 1820; Grecian and militaristic. I'll post a pic today. I also bought a federal-era console table for chump change because someone had taken off the decorative brass fittings on the feet. It has an eagle inlaid into the front, so that probably is from the 18th century US.

None of this is fine furniture and an antique collector would turn up their nose at it, but I was able to get it all cheap, and it functions, and is clean, so it works for me. If the prices were the same as they were even 20 years ago I'd have been buying my furniture from Ashley's. As it is, I've spent as much on the antique furniture as I would have if I bought the similar things from Ashley's.

When I was shopping second hand for a couch, I kept seeing references to Ashley’s and didn’t know what that was. I found the outlet and walked through it once. Yuck!

Stay far far away. You did much better with furniture at least 50 years old. Looking for the pictures later.

It’s important to keep Parker entertained. That, after keeping him fed, is your life function, after all.

I agree completely, I've been through a couple of Ashley's stores and they always depress me. The same way that the Miami vice style depresses me. It's just wrong.

It's also a matter of taste. I am a huge fan of what collectors call Hollywood regency. The best way to describe Hollywood regency is to think of the furniture Ava Gabor bought with her to the farm on Green acres.

But there is a style, popular for a brief period in the mid 1970s, that was wrong and is wrong and will always be wrong. The infamous mock tutor / ski chalet look that some houses adopted. Complete with an arched fireplace made of brick and faux rustic beams along the ceiling. Every time I see a house like that it always makes me really, really sad because it was a horrible mistake.

>57 tardis: Here ya go. You're also in luck if you need giant metal dragons, and I know a place for a life sized tiger or camel. Your neighbors would be green with envy.


>60 SomeGuyInVirginia: I'm so looking forward to the pics once you have everything arranged! I'll bet it's amazing.

Trolls. Swear to God they always get 'run and hide' mixed up with 'seek unobstructed view'. They won't last a New York minute with that Carnosaurus what's broken out and is now running wild. The reason you never see trolls in the wild is because the first sucker comes along is going to pick those trolls off. And the blue hair doesn't help. They are what hunters call 'low-hanging fruit'. Which, when it was explained to me, was not as interesting as I first imagined.

The delivery guys were here yesterday and they did an amazing job getting everything in and placed. And then I ran them ragged for a couple of hours rearranging rugs and couches and all kinds of stuff. They never batted an eye. I did nothing but follow them around and tell them what to do and I had to take a nap.

Some bad news. The rug in what I call the Baby's Room just doesn't work. I might have something in the basement that I can change out for it, or I might buy something over the next few months.

I call it the baby's room because, of all the rooms on the ground floor, it's the only one that doesn't have super dark paint on the walls. Instead, it's got a light blue. It's also going to be my office.

The dresser on the left was the one that was delivered yesterday, and the tag the dealer left on it pointed out that it's called neoclassical style.

The secretary on the right is what I used as my home office desk for decades. I'm going to buy a cheapy from Costco to put in the baby's room.

The table in the window artfully draped with what is probably my favorite rug of all time is where I tell fortunes. It's also Parker's perch. Mostly it's his perch. I don't really tell fortunes since the incident.

The dresser in the baby's room. That sucker is old, way old. I've had the painting in storage for the past 18 years, but I really like it so I decided to put it out somewhere. Not sure if it's going to stay where it is. You can see the rug and how it just simply isn't working in that spot.

You'll also see a lot of grey rug pads sticking out from under carpets. As soon as I'm sure that everything is where it's supposed to be I'm going to cut those back.

The side table. I got the bowl from my grandmother after she died, I'd always liked it.

In case you're wondering where all the clutter's gone, I give you my dining room.

Everything will get done eventually. You have some really nice pieces that I'd like you to leave me in your will.

So you (or your magical movers) did get the white couch to the basement. I really like that Polo Blue. It seems to have purple undertones . Very classy!
One of my daughters has lusted for a chesterfield sofa and she finally found it in white. She’s now got the living room blocked off from dog and children with food to protect it. She’s converted her dining room to a sitting room for them, and by gosh, it looks a lot like your dining room today.
I particularly like that dresser in the baby room, too.
Good fortune rains down sometimes.
Thanks for your posts and pictures.

This is, like, the third time Parker has come up to me today to let me know that he thinks that I am sketchy AF.

>71 2wonderY: The magical movers got the white couch in the basement, and I did not ask how they did that trick. At its thinnest the couch is 31" and the door into the den is 28". I did not ask because I did not want to know. Nothing seems damaged so that's good enough for me.

I totally get why your daughter would want to block off a room that has things that she prizes in it. I imagine the couch is beautiful.

I loved that dresser from the moment I saw it. It's so old that every square inch has been handled so often that the surface is smoothed and polished. It's the river rock of furniture. Time itself has groomed it. The dealer said that it's probably from the last half of the 17th century. You can just see the seat of a chair in the bottom left corner of the photograph. That chair is even older, it's from the first half of the 17th century. It's a country piece of furniture made for everyday people, and even though it's very small it was made for adults. I guess people were smaller back then.

Yes, sometimes fortune does rain down. I have been counting my blessings.

The last of the rugs came about an hour ago. These are Pakistani interpretations of Persian rugs, but they differ in significant ways; The borders are much thicker and common in Pakistani and tribal rugs rather than Persian shop rugs, and the colors are somewhat more muted.

These high-end Pako-Persian rugs are new to the market or at least new to me. I'm kind of confused by them because, on the one hand, they're clearly hand knotted but, on the other, they're able to turn out rug after rug each identical to the other, even in different sizes. Also, the knot count is extremely high; this rug's count is 256 knots per square inch. 100 knots per square inch means a shop rug is high quality. Tribal rugs can have much fewer knots per square inch and still be considered high quality.

The standardized patterns and the super high knot count lead me to believe this rug is machine made, but the knots on the back are clearly formed by hand. I just don't know how they're made. Do they have a diagram died to the foundation? That would make sense.

Hand made Chinese rugs can also have super high knot counts, as much as 1,000 k/si or sometimes more. I avoid them because I suspect they're made with slave labor and I've heard rumors that people go blind making them.

Anyway, I like this rug and the living room is getting to be close to done. Woohoo!

I moved the mantle clock in >58 SomeGuyInVirginia: upstairs and it suddenly started working on its own. Dad died in 2018 and he must have been the last to have wound it. Plus, it's working without a pendulum. It's been running for about 48 hours now. It's both poignant and a wincy scosh creepy as hell.

Maybe the house came with a roommate? Boo.

It stopped running. In a way it was comforting because it seemed that Dad was a little closer.

It's also the premise for half of the Korean movies about haunted houses I've seen.

Probably your dad humming to you that he approves of your new home.

I'm here! Better late than ever. Excellent photos, wonderful furniture, good paint choices. I hope Brother Fluffy is completely settled in. Creepy about your Dad's clock starting up and then stopping again.

>76 mstrust: I wouldn't mind a haunted house, but I don't think this house is haunted. That doesn't mean I can't tell everybody that it's haunted. However, my two closest neighbors have both lived in their house since it was built in the '50s, so they'd have to go along with it.

>78 2wonderY: That's what I went with. I do miss my dad, at times quite a lot.

>79 karenmarie: Yay Karen! Welcome! I'm so glad you're here! Guess what, I've been cataloging the books that have been in storage since 2004. Right Now I'm dumping everything in the 'permanent collection' group. I'll sort out the details later. I can't even tell how many boxes there are, because there are so many boxes of other stuff hedging them in. The books were the heaviest thing so they got unloaded first.

I did find my collection of black velvet paintings! Three of Elvis, three nudes. I hung the two vintage 1970s nudes up in the den but I will not be posting pictures of them because, one they are in bad taste and, two they're the kind of thing that can land someone in a lot of trouble these days. So far everyone who's been in the den to see them has gotten a kick out of them. I found them about 20 years ago at the flea market at Eastern Market on Capitol Hill. I saw them across a parking lot and literally ran to the dealer and shouted, "How much for the paintings?!". When she said $5 I shouted that I'd take them and when she said that she meant $5 each I shouted I'll take them both, while dancing from foot to foot and very probably hyperventilating it was not my game face. I handed her $10, and that's when she did the most beautiful thing- she pointed to an electrical cord running from the bottom of each painting and told me, "They light up.". At which point I wept openly. There are little glass inserts in the painting that light up when the switch is turned on. When I was carrying them out of the flea market to my car, some guy tried to buy them from me. I didn't even slow down to tell him no. Neither painting still lights up after having been in storage for so long. I'll pop the backs off and see if I can reconnect the wires, I'm pretty sure they just slipped.

I have a trespasser. Since I've moved in someone has been taking and returning my trash cans, and I had an empty Amazon box in the carport that went missing yesterday. Theft for gain doesn't seem to be the motive since there's also a hand truck and a bag of mulch out there, and if I were stealing things I'd rather have the hand truck than an empty box. I'm going to put a camera out there to see who it is. If it turns out to be a control thing I think I might already know the culprit. One of my closer neighbors kind of strikes me as being a Gladys Kravitz type. Anyway, it sort of angers me that someone's just coming on my property and messing with my stuff.

Ew, yeah. Gotta find out who is poking around.
Mulch!?

Like putting your cans at the curb and then putting them back after the garbage truck has come? Helpful.
Taking stuff that they don't like seeing on your carport? Get 'em!!!
You have a right to be angry that someone is coming onto your property to arrange things, that's kinda crazy.

My brother's gone AWOL and I'm worried that he might have had another heart attack. I may be driving to Virginia Beach today. His girlfriend is going over there now to see if she can find out what's going on.

Eric's ok, just in pain.

Hi Larry!

Your velvet Elvis and velvet nudes are so you. What a great acquisition story for the nudes. And the Elvis made me think of Weird Al Yankovic, and here's the link: Velvet Elvis

Cataloging books is one of those things like good sex, chocolate cake, and an alcohol buzz that get the endorphins rushing. Have fun. With so many books to add you might want to consider a CueCat, not to make Parker D jealous.

>81 SomeGuyInVirginia: I’d be livid. Ugh to the Gladys Cravitz types. Isn’t it nice to be able to just say “I’m going to put a camera out there to see who it is.”?

>84 SomeGuyInVirginia: I’m sorry about your brother going AWOL. I hope it’s something minor or just irritating. edited to add: Whew! "Just pain".

>85 SomeGuyInVirginia: Is he okay?!

I might try that CueCat thingie, it could save s lot of time.

No, Eric's not ok but he won't tell me how sick he is. Or anybody. He's gotten the idea that he didn't want to be as burden so his health continues decline and he doesn't tell anyone or reach out to one of anyone, so now everyone has to scramble behind the scenes to make sense of what's going on. I really don't know where he got that. Mom was that way but at least she was up front about things and kept people informed, she just refused help.

I dumped a bag of bird seed out back, or as I like to call it Cat TV Bait.

I'm really sorry to hear that. Some people won't admit when something's wrong. It's probably a case of "If I say it, then it's true."
I wish you luck in getting him to the doctor. I know you're worried.


Thinking of you.

Drat siblings! You want to give them a good shaking before the bear hug.

Eric's been admitted to the ICU, he's not responsive and is in renal failure. I feel certain that he will make a comeback but none of this is good news. I'm waiting to speak with his nurse now, and will probably be going down there tomorrow.

Prayers for you both.

>91 SomeGuyInVirginia: PMing you.

Ah, Larry. You and Eric are in my thoughts and prayers.

Thanks guys. Eric is covid positive, is sedated and not responsive, is on a ventilator, and has internal bleeding. They think now that he might not have had a heart attack a few weeks ago because they can find no damage to the heart.

I'll know more tomorrow. Thanks again for the warm wishes!

I really hope he's improving, and that he's comfortable.
Sending you two my best wishes.

*hugs*

Thank you. Eric's condition is somewhat improved in that he will try to remove the feeding tube when they go to move him around, and the internal bleeding has stopped. He continues to be sedated and intubated. We've gotten to the stage where I had to convey Eric's resuscitation wishes to the doctor, but we don't know if it will be necessary to enact them. Right now I'm just waiting for a change in his condition, either for better or worse. It may be some time before something happens.

So sorry to hear about Eric. That Covid just complicates already existing conditions. Can I be nosey...what is his age?

I spent all of yesterday on the phone with Eric's friends, most of whom broke down sobbing. I tried to comfort each one. I know that I forget pain and that it's a coping and survival mechanism, but I think that yesterday might have been the worst day of my life. It was certainly emotionally draining.

Eric's white blood count is somewhat improved but he continues to fight the infection. His urine output is unchanged but he is not in kidney failure. He continues to fight with the nurses when they come in to move him, even sedated he tries to take the intubation tube out. I had no idea that I love my brother as much as I do.

So devastating, figuring out your own love and pain and dealing with Eric's friends at the same time.

Hang in there, dear one.

Do you have someone to stand by you in person?
Doing so in spirit myself.

>100 SomeGuyInVirginia: I'm so sorry that you and Eric are going through this. It sounds like there are good signs, but that doesn't stop it from being horrible.

>101 karenmarie: Thanks Karen. Eric's friends have been awesome, but every call was an audience with grief. I put together a text distribution list so I didn't have so many people to call with updates.
>102 2wonderY: Thanks Ruth. Not to come stay. I moved here in part to start over. Thanks again, I can feel it.
>103 mstrust: Thanks Jennifer. Right, stable is good. Especially when you consider that he was not responsive when he entered the hospital, stable is very good.

I have to stop using the phrase not responsive. That's hospital speak for dead, but it's how Eric's friend Tom described him when he found him and it's stuck in my head.

I got a little reading done today, spoke with a friend from work and found out that both of us moved from high rise apartments to a house and were a little creeped out by living on the ground, and managed to nab a wasp that had gotten in the house before Parker ate it, which he was trying to do. I also got a ton of bird seed so I'll go and fill up the feeders tomorrow. It's been freezing cold and central Virginia today.

Happy Easter everybody! Next year in Jerusalem!

I hope the creepiness of ground living wears off. I'm glad you got to the wasp before Parker did.

Happy Easter to you, too. Me and my Peeps will be enjoying the day. I hasten to add that at least one package will go to friend Rhoda, who likes 'em too, and like me she prefers them after they've had a chance to dry out. I did eat a fresh (raw) one yesterday and might have another today...

You know, I always liked that gritty quality of Peeps.

Some good news. Eric had periods of lucidity last night where he would follow the nurses commands. Today they're weaning him off the sedation and tomorrow they will take him off the ventilator. He's having another round of dialysis tonight but his urine output is up slightly. His muscle enzymes were highly elevated when he was admitted to the ICU but are now almost within the normal range. Hopefully, his kidneys will continue to improve as the enzymes lower. These are all good signs but things can change rapidly for the worse on covid so the struggle continues.

I feel like I am watching a miracle.

Come on, Eric! All hopeful signs!

Yes! Eric's putting up a fight!

Yay for the good signs. Go Eric!

I had a video call with Eric today. He was speaking and his eyes were focused, although I couldn't understand most of what he was saying. The nurses said he was coming out from under major sedation and would probably sound really groggy. I did understand one thing, when I held Parker up and said 'say hi Parker', Eric said 'hi Parker!'. Poor baby boy, he's still sick sick sick.

That’s just plumb wonderful! Sounds like he landed in the right place for them to pull him back and fast.

I'm glad to hear that Eric is responsive and said hi to Parker. Sorry that he's still really sick, though.

Hugs to you and your brother and kitty skritches for Tinykin Skywalker.

My brother's decline and sickness will result in a death, I just haven't made up my mind who's yet. Over the past several months he has surrounded himself with some very sketchy people. And I don't mean the good kind of sketchy people. These people were robbers, and liars, and thieves, and self-aggrandizers, basically they were politicians without a snowball's chance of ever being elected and no charms they could offer as collateral. Tomorrow we're changing the locks on all of his doors, rescuing his beloved Maxwell from my brother's personal assistant, a 30-year-old stoner who has glommed on to Maxwell as a paycheck IOU. Making him cry tomorrow is my job and I'm kind of looking forward to it. But that's me I'm a people person.

Plus, let's face it, I've developed a crush on one of my brothers legitimate business partners. Handsome DILF, deep social roots and the Virginia Beach - tide water area, lots of discretionary income, sexy thick musculature and nice hands. Coming out of an extremely acrimonious divorce. Yeah, I'd be okay with a weird summer of love.

>113 SomeGuyInVirginia: Sounds like the plot of a novel - person comes to the rescue of ailing relative, routs the leeches, finds love with sexy lawyer :) I realize that last may not really happen in this case, but it was always the first two parts that I liked in that kind of book. I adore seeing the leeches get their comeuppance! I wish you all the best in disposing of them.

Larry's gonna have a day of ass whupping! I wish you every success, with chasing away the skanks, getting the dog and the sexy business partner. And I'm so glad Eric is talking!
May I suggest that you yell "Shazam!" as you approach the skank with Maxwell? Then he'll know it's about to get real.

What Jane and Jennifer said.

The DoAW was a arousing success made less satisfying by the fact that when the gravy train stops sketchy people jump off and run for the hills without a boot to the backside.

Eric still struggling to come back but he is fighting. I finally turned over Eric's advance directive to the doctor, a man with the bedside manner of a bedpan. I made a very plain that three people would be watching him like a hawk, me, Eric's general practitioner who is highly regarded, and my brother's personal attorney who is widely feared. Since then I've been keeping body and soul together with an early version of Deal a Meal, where I trade a fruit or vegetable for a glass of wine at every meal.

Anyway, Eric's white blood count is improving and he seems to be tolerating dialysis. They're moving away from intubation to a tracheotomy over the next few days, which should give my brother some relief and hopefully help to clear out his lungs. So, not all bad news.
,

It definitely means that they were just sketchy people and not real friends.

Always have to have at least one advocate monitoring a hospital situation. I'm glad you've got three of you - a highly regarded GP and widely feared attorney on top of an ... ah, outspoken ... brother will help ensure that Eric is properly taken care of, even if the doctor has the bedside manner of a bedpan.

So glad Eric's doing so much better.

I'm glad to hear the situation has improved. Still a ways to go, I'm sure, but when you've been under such stress and dread, I'm sure you're happy with small steps.
You're doing a great job, Larry!

I keep thinking I've had the worst day of my life and then the worst day of my life rolls around. The ICU doctor wants to take Eric off the ventilator, a second opinion does not back that up. I'm giving it a few days because Eric is still fighting and he may pull out of this. I drew the blinds on all the windows in the house except for one. I found out to my consternation that that is the one window that looks out over the corner where the little old ladies gather to discuss the weather. And, apparently, their bare ass naked new neighbor. Hey, I wanted to talk cool glass of kitchen water and I didn't want to slow down to get dressed to get it. Sometimes stuff happens.

Well. I guess they know where to go for a little entertainment? Honestly, I knew you'd get a reputation in the neighborhood but I thought it would be for dressing Parker up like Minnie Pearl.

I really thought Eric was doing so much better and I'm sorry to hear he's had some kind of relapse. I'm really pulling for you two and I hope he's got more fight.

I'm just not good at updates, I'm just not. Especially when the news is not great. The news today is better, and that's because I've gotten a second opinion. Mom always told me that when you went through the medical system you had to have an advocate on your side, you had to, or you would just get steamrolled right right over. I saw that when I was talking to my brothers I see you pulmonologist this morning, and I asked him a question, and he said that he had already answered that and he would answer it this time but it would be the last time. He didn't have a chance. I told him that I knew that it must be frustrating to deal with people who didn't have medical degrees and didn't always understand what he was saying, but I was going to ask questions about my brother until I understood what he was saying, and that he would, by God, answer every goddamn question I asked him. It was like a miracle. After that point he and I were totally on the same page. Continue to give my brother a chance to recover from the infection.

I always thought the people went straight to hell from pulling waiters and I still do. And I think you go straight to hell for bullying doctors too. But if a doctor's bullying you, it's perfectly okay to reach up his a****** grab his spinal column and yank it out through his anus until he understands that he's being paid to do a job and that's all.

My brother's GP is much more encouraging, but he still says that Eric has a one and three chance a returning to the life that he knew beforehand, and with the understanding that he may have to have dialysis three times a week. I think my brother would tolerate that. He would not tolerate being on a ventilator, or being brain dead, and I try to avoid that. Sometimes the pulmonary specialist and the IC award of the princess Anne Hospital is not helpful. But God help him because my brother's attorney is genuinely fond of my brother, and I will set him on Dr cassabo as a python on a wood rat. I swear it.

So, a one three chance my brother will recover enough that I can kill him. I was supposed to be the one who had before. I partied without any kind of safety net, so many of my friends viewed suicide as a fashion accessory, I was gay when gay almost certainly meant that you would die from it. I may well bury my brother And I'll be the last time. Of course, what's more likely, is that Eric will totally roach my buzz and roll out of the ICU pissed off and blaming me and generally making my life worth living all over again.

I'm the last. I'm the last column and stretching back to Charles the first. We were southerners, we were slaveholders, the way the Templars guarded Christendom. We did it simply and without question And I love my ancestors for who they were. We are ironclad and fierce.

That’s the stuff! I’m guessing Eric shares your spit in the eye attitude. It will serve him well now.

What is it with Lynchburg delivery guys being so uniformly hot? Thank you Auburn Summer breeze.

Ironclad and fierce.

*hugs*

More *hugs*

Hi everybody, sorry for the radio silence but I've been dealing with my brother in the ICU ward of the hospital in Virginia Beach. He is showing signs of recovery but he has a long way to go.

I'm going to focus on the "shows signs of recovery" part and say that I'm happy for you, Larry. Any good sign is a little relief.

Oh thanks be! I was expecting the worst from your silence. Still holding you both up. Stay strong!

I'm glad he's showing signs of recovery.

Take care of yourself while you're taking care of him, dear one.

I had some kind of tree/bush thingie cut down. I guess it was planted to offer privacy, but it's right by the house's foundation and I was worried about the roots. I've always loved dogwoods and there are three in my yard. Two are blooming and really beautiful but one hasn't put out any leaves at all and I guess it's dead. I'm going to replace it with another dogwood.

Get your hands in that dirt. It’s very therapeutic. Honest!

I believe you. Right now I've turned over all my lawn care to a guy here in Lynchburg. He does a good job but one of the neighbors has already contacted me to let me know that it wasn't being done right. Something about flowers and then all I heard were Gwen Stefani songs in my head. People in this neighborhood are very, very uptight about their yards. Which is good, I knew that when I bought the place and it was actually a selling feature.

So far I've cataloged 113 books from the permanent collection. I'm going to take a break this weekend and work on getting my home office set up. One thing about living in a rented apartment is that getting everything put away took a few days, tops. I've given myself a year to get all of this stuff put away.

Hi Larry!

Yay for getting 113 books from your permanent collection cataloged, and giving yourself a year to get all your stuff put away is great.

Crack the whip on the lawn care guy! Gotta keep yourself and the neighbors happy.

Larry! Update!

Reminder that you have readers here too; and pointing to where you began house postings again:

https://www.librarything.com/topic/330626#7517983

I know, I've been a lazy bones. I also need to post the 13 books I've read so far this year. Not awful shabby considering how busy it's been.

I've been looking for an antique Bible box for about a year and finally found one at that antique clearing house about an hour out of town. It was about 1/5 of the price I'd pay anywhere else, and it was in really good shape, so I bought it. I asked the guy working the desk, he's not the owner, how old it was and he said that they didn't know but it was at least from the 1800s and they had just gotten it from England. There is a design carved into the top and I was running my finger over what I thought at first was an old gouge when I realized that it was part of a date- 1771. The numbers were stylized and looked like part of the design, so nobody had recognized it before.

Anyway, here's the box sitting on the Italian wedding chest I also got at the same place. That's the bust of Mark Antony on top of it wearing a riding hat, a string of my mom's black pearls, and some beggar's beads my dad picked up in Vietnam. I thought he'd want to look pretty.

Larry, I love that photo! The room sends out perfect vibes. Gorgeous furniture, and just the right touch of irreverence to Mark Antony. The Secretary is to die for...

What Karen said. You have a real eye for decorating, it looks fantastic! And getting such a deal makes it even better!

>140 karenmarie: and >141 mstrust: Thanks guys. I'm taking it really slow and trying things out before I commit. I don't want the place to look like the collectibles wall in a restaurant chain, which I tend to do if left without adult supervision. The secretary was my work desk for a long time. Now I've got a home office and a real desk.

No, no, it looks really good, not a Claim Jumper vibe in sight.
When you gonna post pics of your library?

Well, I'm back from my brother's and probably won't see him again until Christmas. He had a heart attack, covid pneumonia, his kidneys shut down, he developed sepsis, and was in a coma. He was in the ICU for a 5 weeks, a step-down ICU in unit for 3 weeks, and an amazing rehab unit for 3 weeks. I wanted him to live so I fired his first ICU doc who said he was hopeless, I prayed in the parking lot of the hospital that he would be delivered back to us, I verbally OKed his operations with his surgeons, and I babied him through the extended recovery unit as rehab. The day I took him out of rehab he told me he'd invited back someone who watched over him when he collapsed in his bathroom for 9 hours, didn't call anyone until he turned blue, and then only called another friend who drove over and flipped out and called 911. I love my brother, but this morning he invited the people back who watched him almost die to watch over him again, I said I can't live that life with those people or that life, he made a derogatory comment about gay people scrolling through the news, and I left about 11:15. If he lives to Christmas I'll see him at my aunt's but if he's doesn't, he chose his old life and friends over me. This both makes me want to puke with sorrow and is incredibly liberating. I completely fulfilled the requirements of my duty and made sure he would live and and his medical needs were met.

Even his nurses in the ICU said that his recovery is miraculous. He's walking, he suffered no brain damage, his kidneys are functioning, and he is highly motivated to regain his strength. This was after his first doctor told me that he was a hopeless case and the best thing I can do would be to pull the plug. When I left him this morning he was cleaning up from a dinner he threw for friends last night and was planning for a picnic tomorrow.

So, that's what I've been doing over the past three months.

Oh. My. Goodness. I'm appalled at your brother's choice of his 'friends' over his brother. You absolutely did all the right things.

((hugs))

I hope you can float above the bitterness of it. Rest in the real service you gave him. You are a great brother!

I'm so sorry, Larry.
I think I understand the situation, and if I'm right, that's such a miserable place to be in. You've really done all you can, and that's a lot more than most people could have done.
Maybe calling his local police occasionally to do a welfare check? With what happened, that seems reasonable. And it would probably make your brother angry, so win/win.

My brother has always been toxic to me, you'd think I would have learned my lesson by now but when the nurse facetimed me into his covid unit in the ICU and I saw him lying there in a coma I knew that I still loved him. I guess I always will but, really, I need a long break away from him and he may die before I'm ready to ever see him again.

Anyway, I can now focus on getting my house together and finding something to do for money. That's a definite plus. I also need to find out how to hang pictures on these plaster walls, driving a nail in is like trying to nail into a cinder block and they always bend. When I had that water leak I realized that I had no idea how to maintain a house so I bought several manuals on home maintenance. It's really very interesting, a house is a very complex machine for living.

Get yourself a set of battery powered tools; most importantly, a drill. And masonry bits to get through the plaster.
I like Porter-Cable. It’s midrange in price and quality.

Yes! I did buy a battery-powered drill and extra bits. I don't know why this house is different because I've lived in lots of places with plaster walls and it really wasn't a big deal.

I'm also going to buy a big TV during the Prime Day sales tomorrow and Tuesday. I was thinking of getting a 75-incher but that may be too big so now I'm looking at 65 inches.

Yay for a new TV!

Bill and I have a 65" TV, a 4K OLED, which is what he wanted a couple of years ago. Enjoy whatever you get.

Toxic people are toxic people whether we're related to them or not. Spend time with the nourishing people in your life.

Yay! I'm finding prime day to be kind of a bust this year. The TV I finally settled on, a 2020 Samsung LED, I'm going to buy from Sam's Club. It's a 70-incher and I am really, really looking forward to binging the new season of the zombie apocalypse masterpiece Black Summer.

I've got a shed out back that was built to look like a small red barn, complete with weather vane, and I haven't even been inside it yet. I know there's a lawn mower back there because I bought that from the sellers. I've seen way too many horror movies because I'm afraid that, when I finally do go in, there's going to be a bunch of skins drying on the wall and some will even have tattoos.

I bought a Tiki mug from Mondo Tees and it was delivered on Friday, but somebody stole the box. Several of my neighbors I've spoken with have all said how safe this neighborhood is and, compared to the DC metro area it is very safe, but there are criminals everywhere. A few nights ago the security cam I've got in my basement kept sending me alerts for sound. I have no idea what it was, and it couldn't have been somebody trying to break in, because the ADT system is wired to report any shocks or rattles to doors and windows.

You might find double Eagles or a can full of rare coins out in the shed, or just the lawnmower. Either way it's exciting that there's a bit of your new home/property that you haven't explored yet.

Sorry about your Tiki mug being stolen. You're right - there are criminals everywhere.

The sound in your basement was your housemate, the ghost of the little boy who died there in 1962.
Is it possible that your mug was delivered to the wrong address? You could go on your Next Door app and ask if anyone has it by mistake. Our mail carrier is really bad at his job and people in my neighborhood are always re-delivering stuff to each other.

>153 SomeGuyInVirginia: You own Cold Comfort Farm. Who should accompany you to the shed? Aunt Ada Doom or Flora Poste?

I haven't read it yet, but I'll go with Flora. Aunts aren't gentlemen.

I had the man who does my yard in yesterday to help me set up my 70-in TV. It's much too large for my space and the next time I buy a television, not for years yet, I'm going to get a 60-in TV. My last was 55-in. I moved the couch back a few feet and that helped a lot, at least I didn't get that queasy feeling like I'd just tried on a new pair of glasses with a stronger prescription.

I started watching the zombie apocalypse show Black Summer, but I had a hangover so I didn't feel much like being scared.

It's been in the 50s here this morning. Pure bliss.

I finished up the first episode of Black Summer, so far so good. This morning I made vegetable soup. Started with a strong chicken stock, added onions, celery, parsley, a lime, carrots, and a little curry powder. It's delicious if I do say so myself. A clear broth with lots of chunky vegetables. The celery and the lime work well together and I'll have to remember that.

After a few hours, the fresh parsley gave the soup a bitter undertaste. I need to remember that, too.

May the fourth be with you!

Hi, Larry, and Happy 4th!
Look at you cooking! And you made something healthy too!
I really don't know what's up with the parsley making the soup bitter, I use fresh parsley all the time and haven't had that. Did you squeeze the lime into the whole pot, then re-heat it later? That's the only thing I can think of, going by your ingredients.

Happy Fourth of July!

Your soup sounds yummy, Larry. IP or stovetop?

I rarely keep fresh parsley in the house because I use about 1/100th of a bunch then end up throwing the rest away. I have Litehouse brand Freeze Dried Parsley, which works quite well.

>162 mstrust: You're probably right about the lime now that I think about it. I just cut a line in two and tossed it in the pot. It were great when I did the same thing with lemons when I made chicken a few days ago.

>163 karenmarie: IP! I set it to high for 3 minutes. Since there were no potatoes in the soup, that was more than enough. I think 2 minutes might have worked just fine.

I'm making IP vegetable soup again, this time with beef stock. I have a sneaking hunch that chicken stock is going to be better.

I was up at the crack o' dawn this morning and Parker absolutely lost his tiny little glitter-filled mind over something he saw in the yard. Either that, or he wanted to mark the occasion of me, finally, getting up before 6:00 a.m. He was tearing from one end of the house to the other, all floofed out, wide-eyed, racing back and forth and back and forth and across and back. Well, at least one of us is a morning person.

My point, and I do have one, is that I have seen way too many horror movies to be okay with that. It's a total red flag for me so I was peeking out of the windows sure that a masked marauder was in the yard. I don't know why I like horror movies, especially zombie movies, but I really do. And I really do watch almost every one that streams on the major services. And every one of them absolutely scares the bejeebus out of me.

Soup's on.

Glad there were no masked marauders in the yard. I guess I took one for the team with the 3 armed criminals running around my neck of the woods last week, eh?

Crazy kitty syndrome is fun to watch. Our Zoe is the mistress of the crazies. She's also totally weird when it comes to boxes - the smaller the better.

Hmm. Beef stock.

Everyone is turning to soups this month. I tend to pasta salads in the summer. But daughter made an absolutely scrumptious beet and corn soup last week. I had never appreciated beets because I ate canned beets in childhood. Not at all the same as what comes out of the ground.

Too hot for soup around here. We've been grilling, or I saute chicken and make cold salads. Or GrubHub. That's what we did last night.
Parker was just feeling perky this morning. Maybe you should race from one room to another so he can watch and get weirded out.

>166 karenmarie: You did indeed take one for the team with the four armed escaped convicts at large in your neighborhood. I'd have been tootling around sporting enough gear that I'd have looked like a cross between a renaissance revival knight and Rambo.

>167 2wonderY: I've always like beets. I'll have to look into beet and corn soup. As I thought, the beef stock is really better suited for stews than vegetable soup. I'm still trying to get the hang of spices and what does what. So far I'm relying on salt, pepper, and curry powder.

>168 mstrust: Love GrubHub! It's too hot here for soups, also, but last night I thought that it sounded like a good idea.

You do know that if I did that I'd just play directly into his paws, right?

We've had a protracted heat wave here and, although I've got the thermostat set at 73 degrees, it was actually 76 in the house yesterday and I thought it was unpleasantly warm. I have a heat pump rather than an AC system and I was afraid that the heat pump wouldn't work all that well so I didn't think much about it but it was concerning. Turns out that I needed to reset the day and time after the last power outage. At least, once I did that these system seem to kick in and it's a very pleasant 73 this morning. A huge relief. Industrial strength AC is not as common here in Central Virginia as it was in the DC metro area, and if I had it my way the inside of the house would be 55° year round. One thing about renting, I kept that apartment freezing from April through September.

There are a couple of other things that I've noticed that are peculiar to Lynchburg: fire pits; ceiling fans; circular driveways; barking dogs in yards; and lots of shops are closed on Mondays but that may be an artifact of the lockdown.

>169 SomeGuyInVirginia: Herbs are good, too. Basil is my absolute favorite and I use it almost exclusively, even if a recipe calls for thyme, oregano, tarragon, or etc. You could grow some, although it tends to take over. Fresh with buffalo mozzarella and tomatoes or chopped finely into soups... yum.

>170 SomeGuyInVirginia: Glad your AC is doing its job. East Coast humidity is a bitch.

We have ceiling fans in .... let me see... 5 rooms. I personally don't like air on me so rarely put the fan on here in the Sunroom. Bill keeps the one in the living room on extra-low year-round to keep the air moving. Fortunately it's not noticeable.

Lynchburg is definitely a big change from DC for you and Parker D.

Tomorrow UPS will deliver Grady Hendrix's new book, 'The Final Girl Support Group'. I'm getting it on the day of release and I'm all atwitter. I just finished Riley Sager's 'Survive the Night' and it was meh. I'll also get the zippered tote I ordered from LL Bean and the feather pillows I ordered from Macy's. So a good day package-wise.

Vegetable soup again today. I start with a chicken stock made from bouillon, chop up whatever vegetables are on hand, add spices that seem appropriate, and put it in the instant pot for 3 minutes. It's light and, so far at least, has always been tasty.

I'm trying to see how little I can spend on groceries for a week. Yesterday I went to Sam's Club and came back with two honking great cartons of ramen noodles and 36 eggs. I've started to notice shortages at grocery stores. Not toilet paper or disinfecting wipes, but stuff like carrots and olive oil.

>172 SomeGuyInVirginia: Hooray for a new Hendrix! I look forward to seeing what you think, and no doubt, I'll be picking it up too. I'm expecting delivery today of a hummingbird house for my mom :-D
Nice that you are continuing with cooking, I thought it might be one and done. I spent some time re-working a cupcake recipe for my maple book and they turned out so great that I sent them to work with Mike because his group of eaters, my guinea pigs, were going to be there today.
We were grocery shopping yesterday and kept noting how high the prices are, but we've noticed the higher cost for about six weeks now.

Baking will really be the final frontier for me, but I did just buy a roasting pan and have every good intention of using it. Eventually. I will however try to make bread as soon as I find my Dutch oven. Homemade bread does sound rather fab. I've also thought about getting a bread maker.

Don't buy the new Hendrix. If you can wait a couple of weeks I'll send you my copy.

That's so nice of you, thank you! But what if you love it and want to hold on to it? You still get points for offering, so read it and then decide if you want to keep it, you darling thing.

It could happen. And it could also happen that the Archangel Gabriel announces the New Heaven and New Earth using a kazoo. If it doesn't blow me away like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas blew me away, or The Glass Castle, I'll mail it to you as soon as I'm finished.

Insomnia. Ugh.

Insomnia. Me, too. I was downstairs with coffee by 5 or so.

I was awake at 3am, unable to fall back to sleep for nearly two hours. I conclude that visiting The Ninth Circle must cause insomnia.

For some reason I haven't been able to identify, I can only find this thread by searching for terms. It's not showing up in my 'your posts' feed. Whackiness!

You may have inadvertently hit the ignore this thread button. I did that once. Look for it there and unignore.

Sometimes I do a one-time post and don't care to continue looking at that thread, so I use Starred Topics instead. I keep all the ones I start starred and star this year's threads of folks I want to follow.

>182 2wonderY: Exactly right Ruth, thanks for the heads up.

>183 karenmarie: That's a very good way to cluster what's interesting. I need to do that.

Note to self: Don't saute raw onion on the high setting. Second note to self: Drop off two dozen donuts at fire department tomorrow. There was so much smoke in the kitchen and the living room it looked like a Cheech and Chong reunion.

>176 mstrust: Yesterday I finished The Final Girl Support Group. I liked it but it definitely skews to chick lit. Maybe it's such a forceful part of the narrative because the author is a guy? If you don't want to buy your own copy I'm more than happy to mail you mine.

Smoke detector went off, eh?

Yes, and ADT called almost immediately. So I'm running around trying to not let the onions burn and form a rock hard crystalline coat on the bottom of the pan, talking on the phone with ADT shouting 'how do I make it stop?', and trying to remember my code to plug in while this ungodly shrieking is going on.

I'm going to try again today but this time on a medium or medium low setting. Man I love onions, I put onions in everything.

Today I'm going to tackle getting the closets in order and sorting out the den. Plus, laundry.

>185 SomeGuyInVirginia: I'd be happy to take it off your hands, thanks! And in return, I have a little care package for Parker. PMing you, again!
And the onions on high heat, you'd get the same reaction if you'd dumped in diced apples, anything with a high water content. But it sounds exciting!
We had cheeseburgers with pickled red onions on them yesterday. Very good.

Thanks Jennifer, that's really very kind. I'm sure he'll love it even if it's a stone mouse, because Parker loves any acknowledgment of himself.

I finally came up with a rap name for him; L'il Pist. He's my own darlin' grumble bunny.

I don't think he'll ever be a lap cat, but he has recently become lap cat adjacent. When I'm reading in bed he will come, now anyway, and sit leaning against me, or on my pillow. If he does sit on my pillow I have to remember to pet him, or he'll bite my eye. Don't ask. I know it sounds horrible, and it is, but he's also one of the most loving cats I've ever met. Really, he's like a dog but with serious attitude.

Oh God, I'm turning into that guy.

The past couple of days I've been cataloging books that have been in storage for 20 years and putting them on the shelves in the basement. It's a long process, mostly because I'll stop to read just about every book for at least a few pages. So, this is 16 hours worth of work. Plus lunch, zombie breaks, and laundry.

>189 SomeGuyInVirginia: Yes, you are!

>190 SomeGuyInVirginia: What fun! And good of you to share the spines. Admit it though; you’ll never re-read that Spinoza.

Ethically, I have to admit that, no, probably not.

...I have to remember to pet him, or he'll bite my eye.
That sentence made my day.

>193 mstrust: Thanks, I learned that the hard way.

I've set myself a challenge to live as frugally as possible for 30 days. I've canceled a bunch of subscription services, bought two boxes of ramen noodles from Sam's Club, and stuff like that there. I also haven't bought a book in days, and it's been years since that's happened. It will be interesting to see this month's expenditures from other months. I'm still buying whole chickens because you can do a gazillion things with those in the Instant Pot and live on that for days, eggs, onions, celery, and potatoes. However, no snacks whatsoever.

Hi Larry!

>190 SomeGuyInVirginia: Oooh, shiny.

>192 SomeGuyInVirginia: Not re-reading a book is not a valid reason for culling it. Go Spinoza!

>194 SomeGuyInVirginia: My, my. I admire you. That would be impossible for me because Mr. Bill's eating habits have rubbed off on me more than I'd like.

Holy cow! I found my childhood copy of The World of Pooh. My mom used to read to me from that every single night.

>196 SomeGuyInVirginia: Nice!!

So far, I've been meeting the frugality challenge. I didn't take note of the start date but it's been at least 5 days? Maybe 6? One thing that I do appreciate about the challenge is that it's identified a lot of reoccurring charges for me that I wasn't aware of, or had forgotten about, and although they don't amount to a lot of money per line item, they do add up. So I've been able to remove all those. I found that I had two Hulu accounts, for example. SRSLY?! That's 24 bucks a month.

Right now, there's nothing in the house that doesn't require cooking other than a few stale cookies that I bought about a month ago, and some candy that I bought about two or three months ago. Last night, about 11:30, I woke up with the munchies and rather than eating some crackers I made scrambled eggs. BTW, I make some freaking mean scrambled eggs.

You. Are. Doing. Great!
You might end up with a healthier diet at this rate.
Hulu should have notified you that you had two accounts, but oh well, you caught on to them.
And I want to say that your books look so good on the shelves. Now, don't you feel a whole lot better?

I don't feel healthier because I'm burning off, well, let's just say I accumulated some debt in the health bank and that's going to take a while. I do feel better about the money though. The second Hulu account was on a different email, and I must have signed up for it way back when the pandemic started. So when I signed up using a different email I guess they didn't catch it, or whatever. So I'm going to keep prime with the prime video, and have one premium streaming service at a time. Amazon offers a lot of ancillary streaming channels at deep discounts, often 99 cents for a 2-month trial, and I've put markers on my calendar to cancel those before they go to full price.

Also, according to Zillow, my house has appreciated $15,000 since February. Ho. Lee. Cow. Jennifer, I would imagine your house is just gone through the roof and value.

Geez, it's so hot outside even the basement isn't noticeably cooler. 95° or 100° is just hell for the East Coast.

I'll be glad when it gets cool enough for grass to stop growing. I've got a man to mow my yard and he does a good job, and I genuinely like him, but I imagine that what he's charging me is more in line with what a service would charge, rather than having some neighbor kid come in and mow my yard. His dad caught covid the same time my brother did, but his dad passed from the disease.

It was good to finally walk the line and see what's on my property. I really had no idea that there was some sort of very old poke out back, a smallish pen with walls made from what, to me anyway, looks like what we've built around cow fields to keep the cows from running off. It was probably a garden at one time, or maybe somebody raised rabbits, and the rabbit pen is gone? There's also a stack of ancient firewood out there that I'm not going to touch until we've had a couple of really good freezes. I would imagine that pile is booger central. And that reminds me, I need to get a load of firewood in.

I almost bought an eBook that was on sale this morning, I was thiiiis close, and when I clicked the link I saw that I'd already bought it. Woohoo!

My next door neighbor told me that there were nests of copperheads in the area, and the elderly couple across the street from me had to have someone in to remove one from the roots of the tree that I can see from my living room window. Anyway, I texted the kid that I asked to weed the garden and told him to avoid the old firewood and the poke because there may be copperheads in the area, and I haven't heard back from him. I hope I haven't scared him off.

I Googled copperheads and got some useful information and the usual load of propaganda. One story said that herpetologist object to the term poisonous snakes, because snakes are venomous and poison requires ingestion, rather than injection. Another story said why keeping copperheads in your yard was such a good idea. Apparently the number one reason is because the authors lived in Brooklyn, rather than the country, and exterminating a nest of copperheads just seemed kind of judgy to them. God, I hate experts.

I just unboxed my new LL Bean extra large zippered boat and tote! Really, I think that that and digestive biscuits are all that you need to go anywhere in the world.

>202 SomeGuyInVirginia: One word only; and I think you’ll like it: Machete.

>202 SomeGuyInVirginia: I'm not someone who is creeped out by the thought of snakes, but yeah, the thought of a surprise snake in the yard or firewood gives me pause. On the other hand, you're living a life of danger. Get a theme song.

>203 2wonderY: I have this image of my grandmother, all five feet of her, rushing out of the kitchen in her black crinoline skirts and her sleeves rolled up to the elbow, carrying a machete because someone just hollered, 'Snake!'. Hell yes, machete. Machete with lasers!

>204 mstrust: I sure look forward to nanotechnology, in which I've invested heavily, because I dream of being able to destroy cottonmouths and copperheads from a safe distance. Like a satellite in Guam. But that's me, I'm a people person.

Oooh, a theme song! Yes, thank you! Let me think on this!

I spoke for several hours with my brother's primary care giver yesterday. I really like her, she's ex-navy and there's just no b******* about her. She is a little nuts, I'll admit, but I'm not going to go into those because she's done terrific good work for my brother and I feel that she will continue to help my brother.

I found myself explaining to her why I had not been back to visit my brother since he got released from in-house therapy. She didn't seem at all surprised, and told me that his other friends, friends that he's had for decades, have kept their distance from him for whatever reason and have had little or nothing to do with him.

I love my brother, but when I was talking to his nurse yesterday, and she asked if I might be down sometime, I just said no. Janice said she understood but she would like to meet me one day. I said that what absolutely happened.

>198 SomeGuyInVirginia: Getting down to one Hulu account is good. And scrambled eggs are a wonderful meal, any time of the day. You probably put more stuff in your scrambled eggs than I do. All I use is salted butter and eggs. *smile*

>200 SomeGuyInVirginia: You’re more organized than we are – we’d sign up for a 2-month trial, then forget to nix it before they took our house, land, and child.

Yay for the house appreciating. I think I looked at ours on Zillow a couple of months ago and see that it’s appreciated since then. Moot point, though, because we're not going to sell any time soon. I love looking on Zillow for houses sold and look at all the photos. Most kitchens are seriously shit…

>201 SomeGuyInVirginia: We can’t wait for the grass to stop growing either. Especially, Bill, as he has to mow it. I need to get someone to do the non-mowing stuff – like weeding and putting down mulch and getting rid of the black walnut volunteers too close to the house, and etc.

>202 SomeGuyInVirginia: We have copperheads down by the creek, but we don’t go down there much anymore. When we did, we were extra careful. One time I was mowing the back field on the riding mower, scared up a copperhead who took off away from the mower, and I tried to chase him down to chop him up. I’ll swear he was hydroplaning in order to get away, which he did, darn it. Bill and Jenna witnessed my craziness and were highly amused. That’s the first and last time I used the riding mower. Venomous is correct, not poisonous. Jenna brought this bit of info home one year from school.

Is your new boat and tote monogrammed?

>205 SomeGuyInVirginia: Toxic people are toxic people, even if they’re relatives.

I've been trying to figure out spices, and salt levels because I tend to under salt everything, and I threw this together this morning for breakfast and it worked. Scrambled eggs with curry powder and crushed fresh pineapple. Four eggs, tablespoon of curry powder, and crushed pineapple to taste. It could have used more pepper and maybe paprika? I didn't try tobasco sauce because I thought it might be overpowering, and I would have had to have taken the plastic wrapper off and that's always such a pain.

Today I'm going to make onion, carrot, and turnip soup. I'd add some bacon if I had any. I guess I could go to the grocery store since it's only 2 mi down the road but it's Saturday and I'm not going to bother.

A new home has turned you into a cook! And you've advanced all the way to curry usage!
Have you looked around for local farms? We buy our eggs from a farm that's just about a mile away, and they have a stronger flavor than grocery store eggs. And in the cooler months we buy veg from a farmer's market.

>206 karenmarie: Natch! The tote is monogrammed with a great big old scarlett L.

>208 mstrust: there are a bunch of farmers markets in the area, and I haven't looked for any but I'm sure there are farm selling eggs. Lynchburg is atypical and that it's located in the center of the state and is somewhat remote. So there's the city of Lynchburg and then nothing but farms for at least 50 mi going in any direction.

I have a glass top stove and they're really bad about getting burned on gunk that's impossible to take up even with a brillo pad and some expert swearing. I saw this on YouTube and it works - cover the surface in vinegar and then pour baking soda over the vinegar, let sit for a couple of minutes and work its fizzy magic, then take a scouring pad to it. Some of the stuff you're going to have to really lean into but it comes off clean as a whistle.

I have a glass top stove too. I'll keep the vinegar trick in mind. When I first got this stove I was so anxious about scratching it and I used some expensive cream cleaner on it. Over time, I just went to a vinegar and water mix and everything comes up.
I think that once you see the farmers markets you'll be hooked. And most of them have more than just produce. Ours has a bbq cart, homemade pet treats, local pies and jams, honey, coffee and Italian soda carts. And lots of pastry stands.

There's a stall in the regular farmers market in downtown Lynchburg, and it might be open during the week as well, that sells their own roasted coffee as well as spices. I'm totally into spices, and I'm trying to figure out how to make them work. Right now, I've got 'too salty' and 'too hot' down pat.

I've been feeling very sorry for myself lately. Parker's not having it, and will sit at the foot of the bed and meow as soon as the sun comes up because it's playtime damnit! I made an IP chicken this morning, very simple with only onions, so lunch will be groovy. Man, I do love me some onions.

I'm a big fan of tribal art, especially that from the headhunters in New Guinea. I bought this on eBay from a lady who lives in Virginia Beach. It's the only thing in the house that genuinely terrifies me, it's just so damn creepy. I finally put it out last week and that night I woke up about 2:00 in the morning absolutely sure that it had come alive and was trotting around the house. In the dark. Up to no good.

>211 SomeGuyInVirginia: I thought I'd posted in response to this - but I get easily diverted and must have clicked away instead.

Congrats on getting "too salty" and "too spicy" down pat. Next will be "just doesn't work" and "why did I add that spice?".

If we ever get stuck together on a desert island, you can have 98% of the onions. I do need a few occasionally, but the rest are yours.

>212 SomeGuyInVirginia: It probably was. That reminds me of the Santana Abraxas poster my college roommate and I had in our apartment in Los Angeles in 1973. It was a portal for evil spirits.

>211 SomeGuyInVirginia: I use onions a lot. I marinade chicken in a tupperware full of grapeseed oil, chopped onions, oregano, fresh cilantro, salt and garlic. Or sometimes oil, maple syrup, onions, salt and pepper, and mustard. I also chop the onions very fine and add them, along with paprika, parsley and salt, to ground beef and grill patties. Mike likes this a lot because they taste like Serbian kabobs.
It sounds like you've really taken to cooking!
>212 SomeGuyInVirginia: I can't really tell what it is. Is that a long skinny arm and a long skinny nose? And did you realize how creepy it is before you bought it, or did you unwrap it and have instant regret? Put a bell on it so you can hear if it's coming to get you.
I find a lot of portrait busts disturbing. Some of them are so realistic that they look like severed heads. Sculptures of hands too.

>213 karenmarie: Deal! We now have a sacred binding onion pact. All the onions!

I remember that album cover. Yes, it was just very weird.

>214 mstrust: Yes, it's an ancestor spirit fetish and he's sitting on a bench with long skinny arms and long skinny legs. Being headhunters, they tend to make the heads on their figures disproportionately large, and the nose does stretch out. I knew it was creepy as hell when I bought it, but it's actually much creepier IRL.

I've heard other people say that they were uncomfortable around portrait busts or any artwork that had a face on it. I get totally creeped out by something pretty unusual - honeycombs or any surface that has deep pits or bumps. Frog skin just gives me the willies.

I may be wrong, but I think I just saw a bobcat running towards the woods to get out of the rain. Whackiness!

>216 SomeGuyInVirginia: Now that you know it’s around, it will come after dark and grin at you through the windows.

Imagining a bobcat with a Grinch grin. Also wondering what bobcat fillets would taste like?

>218 SomeGuyInVirginia: Nasty. There’s a reason we don’t eat other predators. We had lunch at a Chinese restaurant near work once and my dish was awful; a week later they were closed down for substituting cat for chicken

But humans are supposed to be delicious! So I've heard. Having had no experience in that field whatsoever. No, really.

In 2002 I went on a office lunch to a super popular Asian fusion restaurant in DC. I had sushi and developed a stomach ache that lasted for about two months plus I couldn't drink orange juice for about a year. Three weeks after we were there, the city shut it down for widespread health and sanitation violations. This was in 2002. You had to seriously screw up for the District to take any action against you in 2002. It was still a pretty lawless place.

>220 SomeGuyInVirginia: Milk-fed, yeah.

Possibly the same family of cooks. My restaurant experience was in Vienna, Virginia.

Get out! I lived there! What restaurant?!?!

Honey, that was all the way back in the 1980s.

I do have a better Chinese restaurant story from the same era though. The company I worked for was based in Oakland CA, so when I was there for training, of course we partied in San Francisco. The whole class was from other parts of the country too; so we didn’t know. We each ordered a dinner from the menu, right? The waiter looked at us funny and asked if we were sure. Turned out their portions were family sized. Now that was a memorable spread!

Please do all that you can to help those Afghanis who helped us to safely exit the country.

Before they put in a subway stop and it became gentrified, I used to like to go to Chinatown in DC. The shops were just amazing, they had the weirdest / coolest stuff. They also had several good Chinese restaurants but you had to know what you were ordering or you'd get the same food there that you would get in the suburbs. My personal favorite was a place called Eat First. The name came from a Chinese proverb that said no matter what happens, eat first. They had a menu that was printed in Chinese and English, and then they had cons of handwritten bills on the wall, all in Chinese. I asked one time what was on them and the waitress didn't even bat an eye when she told me that I would not like it. I saw somebody picking out a chicken's foot from a bowl of soup a few tables over so I took her at a word.

We had a tornado watch earlier and P-Bitty and I spent an hour in the basement.

Has the tornado warning ended?
Chicken feet are a common dish in Chinese restaurants, on the actual Chinese menus.
Mike has had them, but he loves getting the BBQ duck heads from Chinese restaurants too.

Sorry about the tornado watch. Watches aren't as bad as warnings - was it really a warning, meaning that a tornado had been sighted?

Inara and Kitty William and I spent 45 minutes in an interior bathroom many years ago because of a tornado warning.

Hiya, Larry!

Happy Monday?

Thanks Karen! I've had food poisoning since Friday night. Not completely sure what caused it but I'm 99% sure it was a red pepper that I'd had in my refrigerator for quite some time and decided to blacken with garlic and mix in with rice and eggs. The pepper looks fine but I started having digestive problems within an hour of eating it. Whatever. I went to the grocery store this afternoon and picked up ginger snaps, vanilla wafers, and box red wine. Hopefully that will make my stomach feel better. Plus, it's allergy season.

I found my birth certificate!! Whoo-hoo! If I'd lost it it would have been irreplaceable. My original birth certificate came from a covert ops base in the US that has closed down, plus they misspelled my name. Dad got it reissued with the correct spelling, but if the updated certificate had gotten lost in the move there was no place to go to get it replaced. With covid closures I'm sure it would have taken quite a long time.

Yikes. Food poisoning, so not good. Hmmm. I've never heard of the ginger snaps, vanilla wafers, red wine cure before, but if it works, fantastic. Poor Parker must have been worried - our kitties are always stressed when one of us is sick or in pain.

Hope you're feeling better soon.

Congrats on finding the birth certificate. Covert ops base... that sounds like a fantastic story about your dad (assuming dad, perhaps mom?).

Ginger snaps instead of ginger ale? Sounds good enough that I picked up a bag for myself. I think I’ve had boxed wine, but not red! You’ve got to spend a bit more for degustble red wine!
It’s awful when you abandon us. It’s always something traumatic. Hope you’re feeling better.

Thanks y'all! I do feel better but my insomnia is kicked in and I've been up since about 11:30 p.m. last night. Whatever. Like so much in life, there's really nothing to do with insomnia except to deal with it on a one-to-one basis.

Still working on getting the house together. It's going to take a long time. This is really three households worth of stuff, as well as my stuff that I've had in storage for... just very long time. So much of it needs to be sold or donated. Trying to practice extreme frugality has given me insight into my impulse purchases, and what I need versus what I want.

Have you ever tried turning around so your head is at the foot of the bed? I do that when I'm having a tough time and it usually works. The bed feels totally different and sometimes that's all it takes. I had read about how Edison had insomnia, and a huge house with lots of bedrooms. When he couldn't sleep he'd go from bed to bed until he fell asleep in one. I just turn the other way round.
After you sell your old stuff, you can spend the money on new impulse purchases. Like a financial roll-over rather than actual spending.

I'll try it. Generally, I can get to sleep sometime between 3:00 a.m. and 4:00 a.m. If I'm not asleep by 4:00 a.m. I'm not going to sleep.

I've been really good about preserving financial assets. It's not like I'm struggling or anything, I just noticed that my spending on fitting out the new house was unrestrained and unsustainable, and would have left me broke. I thought I'd try the exact opposite for a while to see what happened, so really it's as reactionary and irresponsible as spending a whole lot of money. Cream of wheat really is awesome for breakfast, and an onion and a few carrots and a potato put in the instant pot make a really delicious soup. You can do enough things to ramen to make it interesting over a long run. But you're right, it is nice to send a little bit of money at the end of the month into an investment account that would have otherwise been spent on a Regency linen press. But holy cow that Regency linen press was in pristine shape and ready to use, and cost less than a brand new wardrobe. The bottom has fallen out of the antique market so, if you like old furniture, this is a good time to pick up something interesting that's going to outlast that IKEA thing you've got. But I digress. Get thee behind me, Chase Manhattan!

Speaking of food, I'm famished. I'm going to go make lunch/dinner.

I still feel kind of grim and wonder if I might not have come down with a bug rather than food poisoning.

My Fairfax County and Arlington County Library cards both expire shortly. I called Fairfax County and the reference desk librarian said she would extend the expiration date and boy did she! That card doesn't expire until 2100. I'm pretty sure I'll be dead by then, or cryogenically frozen and just into audiobooks. Or one of the vast legion of the undead shambling across the earth looking for the last few survivors. Hopefully I call to Arlington will also be enough, but if I can only keep the Fairfax card that would be fine. The system has a huge selection of ebooks and audiobooks, and access to several useful online databases.

I'm continuing to pull together a year supply of food, water, and necessities. Nothing I read in the news does anything to diminish my fears that we're about to head into a period of shortages. I did bring all the canned food that I had in Alexandria, so at least I'm not starting from zero.

I have a $50 gift card that I can spend in any frivolous way that I want! I found it once I committed to not buying things that I wanted, it was fairly easy to follow through. Part of me thinks I ought to use the 50 bucks for groceries. Part of me thinks I ought to put it toward a chinoiserie lamp I've covited for a while now.

>237 SomeGuyInVirginia: The lamp! Groceries would be gone in little time; and may cause food poisoning. The lamp will light your way forever (substantially so).

Thank you! Of course I want the lamp, it's awesome and I need a lamp.

I agree with Ruth 100%

Get the lamp.

The lamp it is!

Wait, wait! I have call shenanigans. Hamburger helper is just f****** gross. It's not even McDonald's good, it's like sub knock off McDonald's.

The stroganoff is pretty good.

Yuck to hamburger helper. Google or Duckduckgo "skillet beef and macaroni" and find a recipe that uses ingredients you have or can easily get. I've made it several times over the years and the family's always loved it, although I don't have a current recipe.

I think I'm off hamburger for anything other than hamburgers. I was using 93% lean but I still wasn't getting a pop out of it, by that I mean I wasn't enjoying it the way that I would have if it were a hamburger patty, or chicken, or cheap chuck meat to make a roast in the slow cooker.

I've just got my first roasting pan and that's going to be the biggie, because that requires an oven. The last time I used an oven, Bill Clinton was president and I made some sort of chocolate peanut butter cake at Christmas time. It really wasn't very good but the house was packed with people and it was fun anyway. One thing I did at the start of the pandemic and my cooking odyssey was I invested in good quality kitchenware. My first pot was a Faberwear and I was always nervous using it because the handle was loose. Most of my cookware is now All-Clad and you really never have to worry about that falling apart. But if something does happen to it then God help you because it's just ridiculously expensive. It's really not for everyday users like me, it's for wedding registries and expensive gifts.

We were using 93% for a long time, but have gone back to 80% because it's more flavorful - it's the fat, of course.

Woo hoo, All-Clad. I'm envious.

I like my Calphalon cookware. And my Cutco knives, Kitchenaid Stand Mixer, Cuisinart 12-cup food processor. Gotta have the right tools.

I'm cheering you on your cooking odyssey, a phrase which makes me picture you trying to make a lasagna in a small
rowboat.
*whisper* I like Hamburger Helper but haven't had it in 20 years because Mike's mom kept making him eat it when he was a kid. Don't tell.*

>244 SomeGuyInVirginia: Or for those that find it for a fraction of the price at places like HomeGoods. I have a huge skillet from All-Clad that runs about $350 normally. I bought it for $99+taxes from HomeGoods.

>246 karenmarie: Don't be envious! I'm like >248 lesmel: and I only bought them on sale. I'm not spending $350 on a skillet.

>247 mstrust: It is sooooooooo gross now. Enjoy your memories.

Is Pazuzu looking in your window?

This is what I get for drinking gin and listening to Vienna boys choir.

>250 SomeGuyInVirginia: Praying for you tonight; whatever the need, my friend.

It's a lot cooler in Central Virginia than it has been, but the humidity is totally jacked up. It's just gross out there.

I just had my first pedicure! I blew my knee out a few months ago and it gets especially aggravated when I walk up and down stairs, and of course I'm unpacking so I'm walking up and down stairs all the time. Long story short, too late I know, I have a hammer toe on my left foot and I simply can't reach the little...sumgun. The nail was growing and it was getting on my nerves so I broke down and paid for a professional. I would have liked everything about it except at the end they slathered all this gunky oil on my feet and now I'm afraid to take my shoes off until I actually step into the shower, which is going to be in about 20 minutes because it's just too damn hot.

Anyway, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Hiya, Larry!

Oooh, a pedicure. I'm envious. Boo hiss to the humidity and boo hiss to the gunky oil.

My sister was supposed to visit in November and I was looking forward to her giving me a pedicure, but we've cancelled her visit because of Delta.

In the meantime, I whack at my toenails with nail scissors and have a good emery board to file down the rough spots. And I'm still not biting my fingernails - a 59-year habit that I broke last year. The only good thing about the pandemic for me personally.

That's yooooge! Mazel tov! Wow, breaking a lifelong habit like that is really something, it must be enormously satisfying. I know that you had stopped but I'm really glad that you are staying stopped.

I was really embarrassed going into a nail salon to get a pedicure, so I went full bore male and joke too loud and spoke too loud and complained about having to pull my foot in and out of that hot pot too loud because every time I did I had to take a breather because of my knee. I figure if I were going to be uncomfortable then, by God, everybody there was going At least know I was around. How much done something right because I tipped the lady in cash and she told me to come back in 2 weeks before the store opened so she could finish the work. I just wanted a simple toenail clipping and when I sat down she took one look at my heels and said 'Mr, you need the professional cleaning. You need something done with your heels and this callus on the side of your big toe. Seriously.'. So I gave her carte blanche. Like I said, I liked everything except that lotion rubbed down at the end. That was just kind of... Ooey. When I first got there she asked me if I wanted to color and I missed my queue and said of course not. What I should have said 'was only something fabulous.'. I knew a guy who worked for the NSA and he regularly had his toenails painted wild colors, plus he wore sandals. I'm guessing he had to be really, really good at his job whatever that was. I do know that he was an agent and not a tech. But I don't know anything more than that. And I'm not just saying that because I don't want to get whacked.

I really need to update my 75 book challenge for 2021. I'm not going to come anywhere near 75 but I have been reading, I just haven't been adding them. Plus, PLUS, I just set up the greatest reading lamp of all time behind my headboard so that I can read in bed and not have to turn the pages to face the bedside lamp. I have to say that the result was not expected. The lamp brand is NXONE led floor lamp And it is the most amazing reading lamp I have ever used. I've won down in my den over my comfy reading chair and absolutely love it. It has five different kinds of light, ranging from a warm yellow to super intense bright daylight, and you can adjust the brightness from very dim to blinding. In the den, with the chair, it's great. As a reading light over my headboard, it seems a little hospitaly. Maybe I should try another lumen setting. Reading an Alfred Hitchcock collection of stories last night I realized that I kind of enjoyed the yellow light from my bedside lamp, and having to shift the books slightly when I Read from the left hand page to the right. I don't know, I had 100% insomnia last night so maybe I was just in a weird place and tonight it will be great.

Roger's going to be here tomorrow to mow the lawn. I feel indebted to him because he actually came by the house and asked If I was looking for lawn care and of course I was, but I do have a very strong hunch that I'm paying him a lot more than I would give to a neighborhood high school kid. Anyway, we're the same age so at this point in my life it's all about trickling down.

Oh oh oh! There's a crotchety little old lady, and by crotchety I mean that I simply adore her but she is a force to be reckoned with, who lives next door to me. I heard ever since I moved into the neighborhood that if she asked you to do anything in your yard it was really more a royal command than an observation or a request. So she asked me to cut back a butterfly bush that is on my property and borders hers and part of the branches stick out over her yard. I didn't even stop to ask what a f****** butterfly bush was I just said absolutely! And I did have a neighbor kid come over and cut that son of a b**** back to a little more than its stem. Tuesday, when a local peach orchard opens up, I'm going to go by a peck of peaches and take half over to her as a peace offering. These little old Southern Ladies, they require the the respect and obedience that you would pay to a warlord in a royal court. Seriously, they are not to be messed with. I really like all my neighbors, but I have to confess to a special fondness for the two little old ladies who live on either side of me. Whenever I'm speaking with either one they bring with them the shores of a completely different age and generation. They are gentile Southern in away I only understand as a set of rules and cues and they know as a way of life. And their histories are absolutely different from one another; one is black and one is white.

Did you buy the peaches? And did she accept them?
I intend to be a crotchety old lady myself. I'm currently laying the foundation for a terrible reputation down the line.

I've been dreading hanging pictures on these plaster walls, so I had a pro come in and do it. The living room and the dining room are both coming together and the dining room will be papered soon, pics to follow. The first two pictures are in the living room. The portrait of Lady de Clifford is in my home office.

Those are some stunningly beautiful pieces of art! You seem to have designed the rooms around their coming.

Thanks Ruth, I know you have a good eye and I appreciate your take on things. Truthfully, the family portrait and the lady are not where I wanted them to be. I designed the living room around having the portrait of lady de Clifford in the same area where the kid's portrait is, with a console beneath it and a lamp, but it just didn't work in real life. I figured it would be nice to have the cavalier singing to the lady on the other side of the room, with a small portrait of his bit of fluff on the side propped up on the mantle. I had no idea what I was going to do with that family portrait. It's massive and really almost 6 ft by 5 ft, but when I saw it it simply took my breath away. This is a 1950s ranch with 8-ft ceilings. That picture was not going to look great anywhere in the house, but I hope that by putting it where I did I've created a focal point and added an element of drama. It needs something else, maybe peacock feathers on both sides? I don't know. I'm just not done with it yet.

Next week is bulk trash collection week in my neighborhood in Lynchburg. I have a ton of crap to put out on the curb for the city to pick up. And they'll pick up almost anything - couches, any branches less than 8 ft long, old refrigerators, etc. I've been working on unpacking things that I know I need and moving crap I have no idea what to do with into the storage room in the basement. It's a process.

Beautiful artwork, and a beautiful fireplace too! I love it!

The lady missionaries for the church contacted me and I told them that I would take them out to dinner, rather than having them over. I guess having them contact me rather than the brother missionaries means there are no brother missionaries for my area. I grew up in the Mormon church. The sister missionaries are as close to nuns as the Mormons get. They have an untouchable mystique that has always given me a sense of awe. They're not even encouraged to be missionaries but they want to get out there and help people. I would rather run over a basket full of kittens than offend one of the sister missionaries. And I would know for a fact that I would wreck my car before I hit a pet in the street. It's a long story. It's just very weird being around lady missionaries. Plus, since I'm a single male I don't think they would be allowed to enter my house anyway. But I don't kknow, they always are in pairs so maybe. So I'm taking them out on Thursday to a restaurant they chose. You know I'm never going back to the church but I honk and wave every time I see the missionaries sweating it out on the sidewalks or their bikes, because they're just kids and they're doing the very, very best they can. I also avoid them like the plague when they come by the house, but if they do corner me I will always take them out to any restaurant they want to go to. God bless them, and keep them far from me. Living a lifestyle which most people think is depraved, including my parents, and believing in God presents some very interesting puzzles. In the end, I don't care so much of God exists or does not exist. I found a way of life that works for me. I don't think I would have seen it if God had not already been there.

Whatever. I'm also looking for a really high quality cashmere blanket for my aunt for Christmas. I adore her. I'm not going to buy from Hermes because I can't afford it.

You're a dear to take them to lunch - church ladies are a force of nature and it's best to have them on your side.

Living your best life is all you can do, and reconciling two apparently incompatible things is very healthy. You're a good man!

I bought some Bible commentaries for a friend of mine from a former pastor and Bible studies college professor here in town the other day and spent 40 minutes talking about God, Jesus, religion, and etc., with him. I told him right away that I wasn't Christian and had a great time. Learned some interesting things, too.

Good luck on the cashmere blanket for your Aunt. From what I'm hearing, we should all start our holiday shopping NOW.

Have a good lunch with your ladies. You're kinder than most. When the churchies knock on my door I tell them to get off my property, but I'm pretty mean.
Btw, how did they know to contact you?

The neighbor kid who watches Parker when I'm out of town is a church member, and they had dinner with his family a few nights ago and they mentioned me and what a splendiferous person I was. They sound very nice and I will be very glad when dinner's over.

Okay I get it off the rails on the frugality thing and bought another painting. I'll post pics of it as soon as it gets here. The guy who will hang the wallpaper will be here next week and when I mentioned that I hope what I had planned for the room look good rather than looking like a drug dealers dining room, he laughed and said that his fiance is an interior designer and would I like for her to come over and just let me know what you thinks? I said of course!

Oooh, a new painting! Looking forward to seeing it as I love the ones you have shown so far, especially the lady over the wooden chest. She's stunning.

TMI.

Early loves hold a tender spot in our hearts, don't they? Your handsome Puerto Rican sounds dreamy. Kindness definitely counts, even in a break up.

Yay! The wallpaper's up in the dining room!

Wow! That is grand! You’ll need some pretty nifty tableware and I want an invitation to dinner.

PS. Where the heck have you been? I’ve worried!

Thanks Ruth! I really am excited to get it done, it's a major step to completing the ground floor rooms. And absolutely you're coming to dinner!

For the past several weeks I've just circled the wagons and have been trying to make heads or tails out of what's been going on for the past several months. And I've been successful, I feel much more centered than I did, say, back in the summer. It really is very cathartic to be able to say, "Screw this!" and move on.

How have you been?!

I’ve been a bit lost without any regular commitments. I miss my Theia. But I’ve signed up for a college class beginning in January and that should help. It’ll also afford me a way to meet new people. That’s been hard to do this past year.

Here is a close up of the wallpaper design. One really good thing about it is it has every color in it so it will go with everything.

I've been fighting a migraine all morning. I think I'm just going to take a shower and go back to bed.

I love everything about your dining room, Larry. You'll find the right art for the walls, too.

I'm very sorry about the migraine and hope a shower and bed make it go away.

*hugs* to you and Parker D.

Another beautiful room! I really love the wallpaper.
Maybe you'll start a new career as an interior designer. That'll keep the old lady next door from telling you how to keep your bushes.

>275 SomeGuyInVirginia: I would smile every time I even walked past that room.

If you want to shorthand what's wrong with people, just try to give something away for free. I'm trying to unload some things on the Neighborhood app, and this is me responding to the last joker- "No I will not f****** come to your house to deliver two free picture frames because you're new in town and 'don't know your way around!'" Jeebus. I'm going to load everything in the car and take it to the Episcopalian thrift store in Amherst. You've got to respect a religion that has a floor show and its own wine list.

Well, the lady who swore she would be here right at 3:00 to pick up the juicer never showed. I'm going to put it in the car and drive it to the thrift store.

>280 SomeGuyInVirginia: Just like that? In the middle of the night? Escorting your juicer to a drop off location like that. Pixar? I have a script idea for you.

>281 2wonderY: The midnight thrift store, ack-shully that could work.

So about an hour ago I'm in the basement throwing a log on the fire when there's this loud banging on the door and the alarm goes off. I thought holy cow somebody's missing their juicer and they are ticked off about it. Fortunately the alarm announced that it was a shock alarm and not somebody's broken into your house alarm. So I go upstairs and it's a friend of mine who was dropping off a Christmas card and banged on the door to let me know that he was here. So I'm Shiva trying to do three things at once and finally I managed to convince ADT that there's no home invasion. The cat has only recently made an appearance. I can't blame him, it was kind of unnerving. I don't think I'm going to give my address out to strangers in that neighborhood app marketplace anymore.

>282 SomeGuyInVirginia: Poor Parker D! I think it's wise to not give your address out to strangers.

Oh my dear Lord, the temperature outside is soup. I'm thinking of starting a fire just to draw some of the humidity out of the air. If it rains tomorrow I'm going to have to turn the air conditioner on because this house gets a damp feeling in the rain. Maybe I need one of those things, what do you call it, that takes humidity out of the air.

I'm going to run out of ropinirole about halfway through my prescription. I take it for restless legs and I know that I've been taking more than usual but I swear I think CVS shorted me on my three months supply because I've never run out before. I'll need to talk with the doctor this week about getting some extra and I really hope he doesn't go all George Bush 'just saying no' on me. Ropinirole has no street value and nobody has ever used it to get high, but doctors are weird birds and if he gets a hair up his ass about writing a script for more that means I'll be spinning like a top at night in bed.

'Morning, Larry! (thanks for the podcast tips. I'm falling back on a favorite that you reminded me of - This American Life - and laughed out loud at the extended version of David Sedaris's Santaland Diaries.)

Not exactly Christmas weather, is it? Dehumidifier.

Drat. I looked up ropinirole and it's not good for heart patients. I was hoping it might help with what's going on with me at night.

Good luck getting some to tide you over before your next prescription refill.

I really love This American Life, it's the best podcast out there.

Well, today I really do have a sick headache and just generally feel unwell and achy. I attended a production of Handel's Messiah at the local Presbyterian Church on the 12th, and out of the hundreds of people there, there were four of us wearing masks. Me and three geezers; geezer in training. God damn it, now I have to go get that flipping test again. I'm going to wait and see how I feel tomorrow. I really do have a lot of things to do this week that I can't put off. Pisser.

I have way too much stuff in this house and almost all of it is still in boxes. I tried selling some things with little success and I tried giving things away and that is one of those things that will be funny one day. So, I have one room in the house, in the basement, which is an actual storage room with wide shelves and by God I'm just going to put everything on those shelves and let the poor sap I designate as executor deal with all this crap. I mean, priceless family heirlooms.

priceless family heirlooms

Ha! They like them, but they don’t want them.
I boxed Christmas decor to daughter’s house. They all loved the ambiance, but didn’t want to store them. So I boxed and brought them back. We shall see how long I want to do so. I took my picket fence Christmas tree down today. I will keep the crèche up till Jan 6 and also the snow bears.

I'm on the couch trying to sort out the day's mail. Parker is stalking a bird on the other side of the window who has no idea the peril the cat thinks it's in.

:-D
Today, the bird. Someday, the giant who puts down bowls of food. Watch your back, he looks like he knows what he's doing.

I hope you're feeling good today, no illness, especially not Covid.

Yay for Parker D to be interested in the birds safely on the other side of the glass.

Jenna's visiting, of course, so I'm barely here on LT.

>287 2wonderY: Yeah, c'mon! Everybody likes Christmas stuff and nobody likes to store it. Those kids need to make some room.

>289 mstrust: Why are you giving him ideas? oh my god he's right behind me isn't he...

>290 karenmarie: I've got some kind of mild bug but I don't know if it's a continuation or new. I don't feel really sick, just headachy and muscle aches, but I've volunteered to help in a food drive so I'm getting the covid test done again. Now I wish I'd had the flu shot when I got my covid booster. But I'm an idiot.

Yay Jenna!

It's raining here and 66°. The high will be about 70°. At least next week is supposed to be much colder. The winter of 2002 was like this the whole time, I can remember wearing short sleeve shirts to work in January.

This morning I went to bring in the trash can after the removers because it was raining and they left the lid open, and I wore gym clothes - shorts and a t-shirt. That's all I ever wear any more. If that sounds at all athletic it shouldn't, I just think sweatpants take too damn long to put on.

>288 SomeGuyInVirginia: Love that bucolic view.

I like it, too. Parker will probably be happy when the wreath is gone since it blocks his angle of attacks.

Happy New Year, Larry!

Thanks, Jennifer. Happy New Year!

I woke up yesterday morning to a perfect landscape - too early, too gloomy, a lot of snow. I don't know what it is about desolate landscapes that make me feel so happy. They do, though. I love the idea of being snowed in and I've lived in the Alps and the Rockies so I have been snowed in, and I've lived in the desert and loved that as well. I don't think about it much because I don't want the magic to go away.

>296 SomeGuyInVirginia: And the silence!

>297 2wonderY: Dear Ruth. Let's hunker down, and squeeeeeze together, and anticipate the new year and fresh blessings. squeeeef. That was me. Sry I farted. Okay fine don't look at me that way but I know that you use curry powder at least seven times a week and a squeeef is not as bad as a kitchen full of curry powder and boiled greens. Those who know/know.

'Morning, Larry. Happy Wednesday to you. I hope you and Parker D are doing well.

Yay for yesterday's snow. We had about an hour's near blizzard on Monday, but by the end of it none had stuck since it was 58F at the start of the day. AND, I was in rehab for most of it. Bad timing.

>298 SomeGuyInVirginia: Speechless.

All that's old is new again. This morning I went to my local Wally Mart sooperdoopercenter and started putting together my prepper pantry 2.0. Even if this current situation doesn't end in nukes, I may as well buy food I can use if prices skyrocket. Wally Mart has a four pack of generic canned chicken for $8 and the name brand is $16 even in Sam's Club. Say what you will about Wally World but they do have low prices. There was some buzz over a year ago about Costco coming to town but it looks like that's been shelved at least for 2022. Frankly, I'd drive the 50 mi to the nearest Costco to get the organic strawberry jam if I didn't already have some from my first prepper pantry.

I've managed to read six books so far, not bad considering I've been running around like a madman.

Well, look who poked his head out.
It's true, Walmart has the cheapest groceries in our area too. We buy most of our frozen foods at Costco though, and as far as jams go, they carry a Maine wild blueberry preserve, from Stonewall, that is so fantastic. It jumped $3 in price recently.
Six books isn't bad! I know you've been so busy with other things, so you go ahead and have a big spoonful of strawberry jam as a reward.

Stocking up is never a bad idea. You should plant some veggies too, she said slyly.

>304 mstrust: That blueberry preserve sounds amazing! I do love me some berries. That reminds me, I need to check when the local farmers market opens back up. Should be soon!

>305 2wonderY: Yeah, better safe than sorry. I can't grow anything here because of the deer. Man, they are everywhere all the time. What I should do is bag me a Bambi and eat venison for the rest of the year.

Just an idea, plant lavender or rosemary around your garden. Deer hate them and will go somewhere else.

I'm not going to plant anything that's going to have another creature hating me. Trust me, on that front I'm full.

So far I've done really well with my extreme frugality. Other than buying a portrait of Sir Mott by Edward Armitage in December. And a couple of other odds and ends and stuff but nothing I want to go into. Did I mention that Sir Mott was a 100% smoking hottie? What, I'm just going to walk away from that? No. Google 'Mott Armitage'. I bought that. And by that I mean him. And by him I mean Mott. That's right Sir J Mott! When we meet in heaven you belong to me! Or hell! Either.

I've got my weekly grocery bill down to about $40. Sure, I take vitamin supplements because I know it's not a great diet, but I'm perfectly okay eating ramen and egg drop soup for breakfast and lunch. Right now my greatest food expenses are milk, which I have to have in abundance, and orange juice. That's about $10 or $11 every two weeks.

It's not as if the deer would look at the lavender and say, "That guy just made my list." You still get to cook with it or make sachets.

You're doing really well with your budgeting. You're right to be proud of being so disciplined.
I looked at Edward Mott Armitage. 1817? Is this the right dreamboat? He is handsome and I'll congratulate you on your purchase, it's a really great portrait. How haunted would you say it is?

Well I hope very haunted! That said, it failed the test. If it doesn't frighten Parker it's not haunted. You know what scares Parker? Scary masks. And spitting. The only way I can keep him from clawing on the furniture is to make spitting sounds. He absolutely hates to be spit upon. ...ohmahgawd he's giving me stink eye, nobody sleeps tonight...

This is a portrait of John Mott painted by Edward Armitage in the early 1850s. John Mott was a hot rich English guy. Edward Armitage was some kind of painter, I don't know.

Hot rich English guy is the absolute pinnacle of gay dating. For straight guys, it's the same as dating a hot rich Asian girl. English boyfriend / Asian girlfriend.

Is this it?

Yes, hot🔥

Orville Peck. Gay Elvis? No. Gay Roy Orbison? Definitely. Plus hotness, so different.

Orville Peck is the gay Chris Isaak by way if the Mavericks. I never thought I'd be more turned on by a pop singer than I was by Chris Isaak, but Orville Peck does it for me. The mask? I have no idea.

Orville, call me. We can make it work.

Ruth, yes! I know isn't he gorgeous?!

You know what they don't tell you when you buy old paintings and original frames? One, the frames need work. And two, they weigh a freaking ton. I'm thinking of just using masking tape to get everything aligned, and I'm going to have to have a specialist come in to get the damn thing on the wall. Fortunately, the specialist is also... Attractive. I'm not just saying this because I'm old and everyone who isn't my age is attractive. The picture hanger is definitely good looking. The wallpaper guy that was recommended by the picture hanger? Not so much. Nice personality, very energetic, extremely talented. Being straight was a good career choice for him. Unfortunately, the picture hanger is married. One thing I have never, ever done was bomb a relationship. I'm going to use that as my get out of hell free card when the time comes.

I'm thinking of putting it in the dining room, with the gold ceiling and the chinoiserie wallpaper. What do you think? I'm afraid that with the dark background and the gold frame it's going to just kind of vanish into the wallpaper.

Go have it printed to size at a Staples or Office Depot print shop. That way you can more readily hold it up and live with it before you commit to where you want the heavy original to rest.

That's a good idea, thanks Ruth! That would save putting unnecessary holes in the wallpaper.

Hiya, Larry.

Definitely a hunk. The lighting is gorgeous and may work on the dark background. I don't know if this is gauche or practical - what about a light to illuminate it?

If it's gauche, don't hold it against me. We don't have any pictures/photos with lights above or spotlighting them at our house, but my oh-so-very-middle-class parents did.

Larry, you're going to post a pic once it's up, right?

>318 mstrust: absolutely!

Super scary weekend. I had dinner with friends of my parents in Williamsburg on Saturday, and one of them choked on his steak. I knew he was getting air because he could speak, but he needed is airway cleared. This was in a retirement community so I alerted staff that we needed medical attention, and then stood there like a lemon having no clue what to do but afraid that my friend and the friend of my parents was dying on my watch. Fortunately a member of the wait staff also works in the local ICU and perform the Heimlich on him and saved his life. This has only underscored for me the fact that we need to be instructed in basic first aid. I reached out to the local fire department to see if they offer classes but something like that is never going to happen on my watch again.

That does sound scary! I'm glad your friend is okay. Don't beat yourself up, but at least it has you motivated to take a class.
I recall being taught the Heimlich years ago, but I can't tell you where. Possibly in my martial arts class.
But how was the steak?

>320 mstrust: Which piece? Not the one on the floor, eh?

>302 SomeGuyInVirginia: just found your thread, loved reading it instead of working on the call schedule this morning. :)

Aldi's has low prices and their store brand food is really good. They're usually cheaper than WalMart.

>321 2wonderY: I wasn't implying that Larry leapt onto the expelled steak while screaming, "Ten second rule!" Not. At. All.

>320 mstrust: I didn't even order the steak! This was my blitzkrieg of the Eastern shore relatives and friends so I had a Caesar salad for lunch, then drove to Surry Virginia and had a massive seafood fry up for dinner! I took my Aunt Martha to Captain Chuck-a-Mucksv in Surrey for dinner. I could hardly waddle back to the car! Aunt Martha is in her mid-80s and she was standing by the car door tapping on the roof as if trying to segue a blind pilot to the cockpit. I love southern women. They are unflappable. At least, they are unflappable until they are entirely flappable and then watch out! I can't tell you how many times I've looked at a southern woman and wished that I had been born straight. But that isn't my journey and I do love my journey.

Oh my God Jennifer! I was terrified! And after his airway was cleared the only thing that I could think of was would he ever forgive me for not knowing what to do!? Fortunately, he did. But no, I'm not okay with not knowing how to deal with everyday emergencies so I'm taking that class.

>321 2wonderY: Ruth! I am so glad that you have accepted me as a friend and a really cheap bastard. The 93-year-old did not visibly cough up anything that landed in public domain and was therefore claimable. But being a cheap bastard I would probably have at least put anything he coughed up back on his plate.

>322 fuzzi: Welcome fuzzi! I'm really glad you're here!

>323 mstrust: this was top grade sirloin! That's got, like, a 7-minute rule! Hell, if I had pulled a mass out of his airway I would have eaten it... because sirloin.

I have no doubt it was terrifying. But don't blame yourself. Everyone knows what the Heimlich looks like and I'll bet that if he'd continued choking you would have given it a shot. And look, now you have a mission to take the class!
Your Aunt Martha sounds like my late Aunt Jackie. She was from Georgia and had that old Southern molasses accent, which she used to say the most inappropriate things. When I was about ten years old we were having a meal in a restaurant and I said that I liked chocolate. She replied with "Chocolate is an aphrodisiac." Then proceeded to tell me what that meant. My mother sat there in stunned horror until finally saying, "I think she just likes the taste!"

And if we're using a 7-minute rule, I'll end up fighting the dog for whatever drops.

Hi Larry!

>319 SomeGuyInVirginia: Scary about a friend of your parents choking. I'm glad he was okay, and it's a good thing that you're looking to find a first aid class.

I have learned about Southern Women in the last 31 years. Everything you say about them is true - Bill's Mama, Great-Aunt Eloise, stepmom Kay, and her sister Ann. I honestly don't think they knew what to do with me when I first married Bill - a Californian with Midwestern roots - but we all eventually got on well together. I instinctively pushed back with each one of them early on, and we understood each other.

>322 fuzzi: I'm glad you reminded me about Aldi. We have one in Lynchburg and I need to go. I've run out of yogurt, and I'm a huge fan, so I need to go get get 20 or so.

>325 mstrust: Culture clash! Love it! She probably thought of you as 'That Yankee's child', and lost to both the ways of the Lord and common decency. Which is a really great place to be!

>326 karenmarie: Southern women admire grit, and you got grit a plenty!

Bite your tongue. The closest thing we have to a Yankee in my family is my Mike, who is from Michigan, but yeah, my mom calls him a Yankee in the kindest way possible, ha.
But if I could chose anywhere in the country to live, it would probably be New England. I've said it to my mother and she was horrified.

>327 SomeGuyInVirginia: Aldi's has the best yogurt, and not that chunky Greek style which I abhor.

>328 mstrust: I've always thought that I could live in Maine, I mean rural Maine. Mostly because I love snow.

>329 fuzzi: you don't like... Green yogurt??!! It's like I don't even know who you are anymore! I love me some Greek yogurt.

>330 SomeGuyInVirginia: I love most Greek food, but yogurt needs to be smooth, not chunky like month-old spoiled milk...

>331 fuzzi: Sounds like you’ve had a bad experience. Greek yogurt is thicker and generally not as sweet, but it shouldn’t have chunks.
My favorites are ALDIs plain mixed with Stoneyfield Farm maple.

I bought this print at a vintage shop on U street in DC, back when U street was still the ghetto and dangerous AF. I thought I gave it to a housemate of mine, that I reeeaaally didn't like, just because I was moving out and she asked me for it. Well, looks like I pulled it off the wall on my way out the door because I just unpacked it! Wheeee! I've always really liked this image- an original print of The Chinese Girl by Tretchikoff. It's a MCM kamp klassic! (As you can see, Parker has been helping me.)



And the back, with the original 50s gallery info and the $3 price tag that I paid for it.



It's been in storage for 20 years and I forgot that I had it.

>333 SomeGuyInVirginia: She’s lovely!

Thanks Ruth! I'm really glad that I kept it. I'm also super uber glad that I kept it out of the hands of such a really heinous person! But that's me, I'm a people person. I always thought that my giving the print to Charlotte was the last thing I ever did to be nice to someone I didn't like, but now I suppose that it was the time before that! I have no idea what that was.

How cool that she came back to you! It's a fantastic print, you got an amazing deal, and bonus, you've learned that you aren't as nice as you thought you were. You just keep on winning.
Now where are you hanging it?

>333 SomeGuyInVirginia: that's striking.

What's the painting behind it? I'm curious.

Hiya, Larry!

>327 SomeGuyInVirginia: Heh. We say grit, some folks say b****. I, of course, prefer grit. *smile*

>333 SomeGuyInVirginia: Well, you won’t be able to pay off the mortgage, but it does seem to have increased in value. It’s gorgeous, by the way.

Yay for a shot of part of Tinykin Skywalker.

>336 mstrust: I've mellowed in my dotage, I'm practically a pushover now! She's going in my den, there's already a kooky 50's vibe going on.

>337 fuzzi: Mercy buckets! I don't know much about the painting behind it, other than it badly needs dusting and has 'London' stamped across the back. Tinykin Skywalker is helping me again!

>338 karenmarie: Heya Karen! I couldn't have done it without Tinyken's help!

>339 SomeGuyInVirginia: I like that woman’s modest glare.

Another Parker sighting! I feel blessed.

>340 2wonderY: This is one of my favorites. I'd love to know who painted it. It's nice to think that it was somebody well known, but back then artistic ability was encouraged and almost ubiquitous. It could have been Joe schmoe for all I know.

>341 karenmarie: Da Floof! Lovely little guy, he's never more than a few feet away from me.

>336 mstrust: You would have loved that vintage shop on U Street. This was back in the mid-90s and mid-century modern was just taking hold in DC. There were some shops on Columbia that specialized in furniture and they were high-end. This place specialized in kitch and camp, so lots of bar wear and panther TV lights, pill box hats, streamlined kitchen gadgets, and funky toys. There was a great used bookstore a few doors down so I would go there and make an afternoon of it. It was still the kind of neighborhood where you did not want to be there when it got dark, though. The neighborhood has done a complete 180 since. Then it was the ghetto and now it's known as the ultra hip u street corridor.

I had an area full of vintage and antique stores when I was a teen. It's called The Orange Circle, in the City of Orange, and my sister and I were there every chance we got. The buildings were 1920's and our aikido dojo was there, a shop that sold Dutch candies, a punk store selling Doc Martins, and scads of vintage stores selling clothes and antique furniture.

Oh that's right! You lived in California, mid-century Mecca! Didn't you design a room in your house in mid-century modern style? I think I saw a picture of that?

I've got ants! Damn they are all over the sink. I have no idea why, I don't leave food out and I put dry stuff in airtight containers.

I'm going to have company the end of May, and I have so much left to do on the house. I'm really glad for the company but all these chores that I've been putting away or loosely planning in my head, now have to happen pretty fast and in the real world. Part of that is figuring out what to put on the wall, and how to arrange it. It took me 3 months to design my living room.

Well, it's probably not a big deal after all. My guest is straight so he may not even notice.

Okay, is it just me? Whenever I go to someone's house for the first time I absolutely will check on their medication and go over the books that they have. I mean, snooping like that is just being neighborly.

Books, not medicines, Larry!

Buy some boric acid and mix with sugar and water in a shallow container -a jar cap or the like. Put it out where the ants are. Figure how to do that to keep Parker from messing with it. The ants are coming for water. Don’t ask me why!

The ants are looking for water?! Well, that makes sense because they're all over the sink and not really anywhere else. I can't put down anything that could even possibly hurt Parker. I've been leaving pots to soak overnight in the sink so I'll stop that and hopefully it will help. Plus I'll throw some ant traps under the sink and put rubber bands over the handle so Parker can't get into it.

I'm still unpacking stuff and just found an antique cop's billy club that I bought, gosh, 20 years ago or so. I am delighted to see it because I was certain that it had been stolen by the kids who moved me from the 14th floor in my apartment to the 16th floor. It just goes to show you what happens when you jump to conclusions! Obviously, these kids stole something else and not what I was afraid that they stole!

Hey! One good thing about having the picture hanger over?! He's totally hot! Geez, I am stoopid when it comes to dark-haired country boys. He's straight, and not just straight but married with kids, so it's completely conjecture... And occasional naughty fantasy... but by God what the hell!? His craftsman skills and shorty shorts are always welcome over here, is all I'm saying.

Ok, I'm stumped. I'm going to post a pic of blank wall space and I welcome any feedback on whether it needs to be filled in or if it's good as is. I'm okay with maximalism as long as it doesn't segue into clutter, which I hate, but I do get a lot of stuff. Comments please! I have a lot of stuff in reserve so if you want to approach the issue as filling or not feeling blank wall space, that works perfectly for me. So you can say that, something about 12x10 needs to hang next to x and I will totally get it.

>345 SomeGuyInVirginia: >346 2wonderY: Right on all counts. The ants want water and the boric acid/sugar/water combination really works. We used to live at the foot of a mountain preserve and the ants at the kitchen sink drove me nuts. I dipped cotton balls in the mixture and tucked it into crevices and along baseboards, but we didn't have pets then.
And stay out of people's medicine cabinets. What are you hoping to find, something to blackmail them with after dinner? I hope you get your hands slapped. But books are fair game, dig through until you are asked to leave.
>345 SomeGuyInVirginia: Yes, we've almost finished the downstairs den in a kind of Mid-Century modern. That just means that we have the tiki mugs displayed there. But we were having company late last year too and did as much home redecorating as we could in about a month. Really lights a fire under you, doesn't it?

>339 SomeGuyInVirginia: I like.

Fine. So I've unboxed all this stuff, and now the stuff is laying around and the boxes are scattered around and all the stuffing material is abounding around.

And other news, I'm surprising myself on how willing I am to sell things to a local consignment shop. I've taken the swedish death cleaning to heart!

Something that I found yesterday that absolutely shocked me was... I found my mom's wedding ring and her engagement ring tucked in a ring box in a storage tote in the basement. I still look at it as lava! I don't want it! What the hell am I going to do with it!? I thought that all corpses were buried with their rings and any jewelry that they want, but apparently that's not the case. Which is disappointing because I always look that graveyards as treasure fields but... TMI. What am I supposed to do with.

It's times like these where I feel very sorry for myself because I don't have family who isn't psychotic. I'd contact my brother but I really rather stick a hot poker in my eye than do that. No, that's not correct. I'd rather stick a hot poker in his eye then do that. But that's me I'm a people person. And he's a sociopath. If you have a sociopath in your life I'm very sorry because they are black holes.

As I read about finding your mom's rings I was thinking, "How great!", but I guess not, huh? Still, if you can't stand looking at them and know you never will want them, someone else would probably love them. Visit an estate jeweler and see what they've going for. You might turn them into another painting!
I'm sorry you and Eric don't get along, what with him being a sociopath. You've got friends here though. Whenever you see an angry spitting goat, think of me saying hi.

I always do! I can't sell my mom's wedding ring! Can I? When I opened the box and realized what they were, I reacted as if I'd been stung. Man I wish that dad had given them to the undertaker to leave with Mom. It's very easy to get put out by the decisions that dead people made during their lives. They're not even valuable because my parents were broke when they got married.

This also most likely means that my brother got my dad's wedding ring, and he's never a said a thing about it.

Today is cleaning up the mess I made by unpacking day.

I've decided to bury the rings under the bird bath. That way they'll at least be in the ground where they belong.

Yesterday I did what I have not done since the first few weeks of the pandemic - I sat down and read uninterrupted for 7 hours. I didn't fall sleep, I didn't get the fidgets, I didn't get bored and go do something else. Honestly it was really lovely. I found since the lockdown my attention span is about the same as a gnats.

Hi Larry!

>345 SomeGuyInVirginia: I can understand the books, because they’re usually out. In fact, at my house, the usual entrance into the house is through the Sunroom, which currently has approximately 974 books. The meds? At our house mine are in that very same Sunroom, all f***ing 8 of them, in a bowl on shelf S26. The pill organizer for those meds and the pill organizer for my vitamins are also out, but unless you know pill shapes and sizes that won’t help. Just sayin’ for when you come to visit… Everything organized for you in one room. *smile*

>354 SomeGuyInVirginia: A good solution for you.

>354 SomeGuyInVirginia: someone will eventually find them. Why not make them into a time capsule, with a note about who they belonged to?

Just a suggestion.

Fifty years ago I made my own time capsule in a glass jar, buried next to the side of our house. I don't recall what I put in it...but have wondered if anyone ever found it.

>354 SomeGuyInVirginia: That sounds like a good plan, and I'm glad you came up with something that feels right.

>355 karenmarie: Why you so good to me?

>356 fuzzi: I like the idea of a time capsule. A friend of mine told me to go ahead and sell them to an estate jewelers because somebody out there could use them and appreciate that they're not expensive. But I don't know. I'm a guy who's pretty sure he's going to hell but if I sold my mom's wedding ring then I'd know I was going to hell, and that's a very different thing.

>357 mstrust: It feels right. I also have a human head that I need to bury because, really, in these enlightened times where do you even turn something like that in? Don't worry, I didn't do it.

I bought a dozen eggs today for $2.99. Last time I bought eggs was probably 3 weeks ago and I paid $1.89 for 18. So the price has jumped roughly 140%.

Edited to correct my math!

Better get some chickens!

Chicken make lousy house pet!

>359 SomeGuyInVirginia: The prices are ridiculous. We spent $150 at Walmart the other day on just a few bags. And it costs exactly double to fill the tank of our car from what it did a year ago, and that's at Costco.

>362 mstrust: I'm still pretty deep into that extreme frugality, British 'no buy' fad. I've got my protein purchases down to eggs, 10 lb sacks of frozen chicken breasts from Sam's Club, and Vienna sausages that I dump into my ramen. That's not a lot of variety, so such a huge jump in price for one item really does impact me. Which reminds me, tomorrow is my day to throw everything that's about to go bad in the refrigerator and pantry into the instant pot and make glop. Tasty tasty glop.

My dad loved Vienna sausages! He'd eat them with Ritz crackers.
That's a huge jump in the price of eggs, and bacon, which Mike goes through pretty fast. Onions are $1.49 a pound here, where they were 79 cents a pound a few months ago. I use a lot of them, so I notice. And a small bottle of coffee creamer is $4, minimum.
Enjoy your tasty glop! You're doing a good job! I'm getting sushi for dinner, so I don't have your discipline. But I got a single homegrown strawberry and one French radish from my garden yesterday.

Ugh, so frustrating. I'm like you, I buy onions in bulk and put them in everything that doesn't require honey or sweet cream.

I'm really proud of myself for following through on extreme frugality. Frankly, I didn't think it would last as long as it has. Sure I broke down in December and bought the painting of Sir John Mott by Armitage, but that's okay. Right now I'm in my basement lounge because the ground floor is almost uncomfortably warm and I'll be damned if I'm going to turn the AC on. My electric bill jumped from $80 in October to $240 in December. I call shenanigans. Totally. I had a colonial Christmas, so I had lots of greenery inside and out but no electric lights anywhere. Nothing changed so why did my electric bill jump 4x??!! Appalachian power lets you track your power usage, and so far my current usage for this bill cycle is half of what it was last year. #fightthepower

I also suspect our power company of gouging, but for us it's the summer months. Our bills in the summer are over $300, going up every year with a chart that says we're using more electricity when everything has stayed the same. They even said we used more energy in the months after we'd had our insulation re-done, which cuts the amount of energy usage. We have digital thermostats, so the temp in the house is consistent year round.
The problem is that most parts of the country live under a power company monopoly. One company, no other options.

It seems like it's criminal. After I paid my December electric bill I turned the heat down to 58. Frankly, that is uncomfortably cold for winter months.

Have I trotted out my dead horse recently and recommended the thrillers by John Katzenbach? He's a personal fave of mine from way back, and although he's had a couple of movies based on his books, he seems to have completely flown under the best seller radar. Although I do think that most of his books are best sellers but for the purpose of this narrative let's imagine him both brilliant and destitute, sharing a cold water flat with a tubercular prostitute with a heart of gold. See? John Katzenbach would never have written that scenario for himself because Dumas already had and, frankly, it's a little corny.

My first Katzenbach book was The Madman's Tale. Yes it's derivative as all get out, but it's a really fun read. And that's the thing about Katzenbach's thrillers; they are fun to read. Give him a try. I'll completely recommend everything that he wrote before 2000. They are perfect beach books.

Have I already mentioned anywhere on these threads that I got today's Wordle in two? I only mentioned this, humbly, because continuity is my life. Well not my life actually but it's extremely important to people I rely on daily. Actually, I wanted to thank the littlest of the little people for my Wordle in two because even Sally Field doesn't give a s*** about those people, but because my PA was out with 'food poisoning' for four weeks because that is what insurance will pay for in these enlightened times and not 'cocaine dependency', without Sarah K's help I could think of no one more inconsequential than than the hoards of little people. Bless you, you tiny inconsequential peons who have never had a Wordle in two. I feel your pain. As soon as Sarah recovers she will join you.

Hi Larry!

>358 SomeGuyInVirginia: Why you so good to me? Well, I love Tinykin Skywalker so much that I figure I should throw some love your way, too. *smile*

>363 SomeGuyInVirginia: Glop. Well. I must admit that I tend to throw stuff away, but more power to you. My March 2020 Pandemic clean the pantry in anticipation of The Worst has mostly held up in the last two years although a quick straightening wouldn’t go amiss.

>365 SomeGuyInVirginia: Congrats to your extreme frugality, but yikes to the jump in your electric bill. Ours is on an average-pay thingie with Duke so we’re not gobsmacked with a tripling like you were within 2 months. We’re currently paying $160/month for a 4065-square-foot house, so I’m not complaining. We’ve had to have the AC on for Bill, mostly, this last week, although I admit that I put it on 72F upstairs. I might raise it to 73F, but that’s my limit until I change to summer bed linens.

>366 mstrust: We have no option but Duke. Unlike a neighbor of ours, we are not crazy enough to get solar panels, with payback of 20+ years and Duke saying they’ll buy extra power. Which they don’t actually do because of some fine print.

>368 SomeGuyInVirginia: Onto the wish list it goes. I was hoping for a free Kindle version, but no such luck.

>369 SomeGuyInVirginia: *sob* I’ve never gotten Wordle in 2. Ever. But I take solace in being called a Tiny Inconsequential Peon because it’s such a cute moniker.

Karen, there are times, at least those times when Parker isn't using my furniture as a scratching post, when my love for him can absolutely take my breath away. My immediate reaction is to pick him up and tell him he's a wonderful but he is not that kind of cat. And that's part of how wonderful Parker is. You know, I think that feline fecal mind control parasite has totally got to be a thing. If Parker were a human being I would have kicked into the curb years ago. But he's got that adorable face, and the hairy butt, and that absolutely heart wrenching meow that means he wants to be combed immediately, and I am simply his slave. I will say that I would not have put up with any of that s*** from Hugh Jackman. So mind control is a thing.

>370 karenmarie: I pull out a pile of books to take to the library, and I sold a couple on Facebook marketplace just to make a buck, and I've been trying to find my copy of Do the Windows Open so that I can mail it to you. All of the chapters were written between a couple years spread on either side of 2000. I know it's not fair, but the writing reminds me of David Sedaris impersonating Woody Allen, but the writing is so much more gentle than that might imply. It's simply gorgeous but I realize it is not everybody's cup of bourbon.

And Jesus, don't worry about getting Wordle in two, that never involves anything other than a lucky second guess. Srsly, is a stacked game.

Actually, it's more than that. If Christopher Reeve showed up at my front door, totally naked and sporting a 13-in erection, I would have booted him to the curb long ago if he scratched my furniture the way my darling little Tinykin Skywalker does.

And I'm writing this as Parker is puking on my hardwood floors even as I voice to text type. Blesses adorable heart!

To be clear, I'm completely comfortable with the household gods that I currently have. Jesus, Dolly Parton who I honestly believe is a living saint, and Christopher Reeve. I know many people that have household gods will immediately consign one to hell. Maybe, I'm not worried about it. I'm comfortable with the idea of my soul resting in hell because of s*** that I know that I've done, rather than things that I'm afraid of having not done?

I hope none of this will prevent the universe from having a naked Christopher Reeve show up at my front door with a 13-in erection. Baby, there's the lottery and then there is Lottery!

Up next, as soon as I move from my phone to my computer, I'm going to start listing Totally Hot Local Mugshots. It would appear that Campbell county has some uber hot drug dealers, as you shall see. Woof!

What is it about you and spring, Larry?

I don't know, something in the air.

More of Larry's "I love dirtbags" talk. I suppose drug dealing is technically employment.

That's just it! I really don't love dirt bags! Every one of my significant others has been as close to being an eagle scouts as they could legally have been at the time. I love heroes, but I will admit that there are some really hot bad dudes out there. And I'm telling you straight up, Campbell county has some hot drug dealers. As you shall see. The proof is in the pudding, as the chorus girl said to the bishop. Wait, what? That doesn't even make sense. The proof is in the pudding, as the innkeeper said to the television pollster. Okay, that works but it loses something in translation. Note to Ed- have innkeeper be hot Campbell county drug dealer.

My 20-page-in review of The Midnight Line, a Jack Reacher novel by Lee Child.

"Gripping and compelling!"

I mean that in the most laudatory sense. Child grabs hold of the raider within the first few sentences, sets up heartbreak and wonder in the first paragraph, and then introduces a mystery within the first few pages. I cannot speak highly enough of Victorian Penny dreadfuls, and Jane Austen, and the purple press. Those people knew how to write to engage and please an audience. It's not an easy task, and it's especially not an easy task now because those qualities are denigrated by every writing professional except those who regularly attain the bestseller list. Lee child has it, JK Rowling has it, and Arthur Conan Doyle had it but he is probably the first modern best-selling author who tried at least for a while to get rid of it.

In the first 20 pages of the midnight line, Jack Reacher is described as being a physically perfect specimen of manhood, who has just lost his girlfriend, set out on a journey with no end in sight, discovered a mystery, and slayed a dragon in the guys of a biker gang. I suppose this kind of understanding of an audience can be taught, although I doubt it can be taught successfully. Lee Child knows what you want and he is going to give it to you.

A long time ago I decided to read the Western Canon, and I will tell you that I was not completely happy with the idea. I was sure that all the books and manuscripts were going to be utterly dull, soporiphic, coma inducing, and dull. I quickly discovered that I was wrong and these books had survived as long as they had because they were a thrilling pleasure to read. Lee Child is one of the few modern writers who has embraced his idea of telling the reader a pleasant story, and delivering on expectations in spades. Read Lee Child if you would like to be agreeably entertained.

(All of this is a really boring way to say that the midnight line is not boring. I'll go back and clean it up later.)

>378 SomeGuyInVirginia: I'm willing to at least look at the pudding! But if drug dealers were bowls of pudding, I'd knock them to the floor and spray Windex all over them :-D.

And you would be completely correct in doing so!

I really need to shift my act from my phone to my computer. My typing hands are so much better at verbalizing my thoughts than my mouth and text-to-speech phone app are.

Yet none of this detracts from the fact that Campbell county drug dealers are, more often than the average, hot.

It's an upscale community, after all. Ugly is unacceptable and not necessary. Standards!

I know! Right?! Thank God, I thought I was beating a dead horse!

Hiya, Larry.

>379 SomeGuyInVirginia: I’ve read all the books published by Lee Child and the two new entries by Lee Child with his brother Andrew Grant, writing with Lee as Andrew Child. There’s also a book of short stories that, being a serious Reacher fan, found marvelous. Have you watched Season 1 of the new series on Amazon Prime? It’s reliably based on the first book, Killing Floor, which I re-read after watching it with Bill.

>380 mstrust: And that is the only acceptable thing to do when you realize a witch has changed a drug dealer into a bowl of pudding. 'Don't get involved with witches', as my granny used to say all the time. And 'no cops'.

>384 karenmarie: I knew you were a fan and I did watch the first episode of the first season before I canceled my subscription. I've read one or two of the Reacher books, and I think the only reason I haven't read more is because they're so easily available. In my head I thought that they would always be there so I chose something else. As Lena Horne said, "Don't know why".

>379 SomeGuyInVirginia: okay, you done it. I'll put Lee Child on my recommended authors list. I keep seeing Jack Reacher movie clips posted on YouTube and have been wondering who this guy was. Now I know, thanks...I think?

ETA: should I start with Killing Floor? It's listed as #1 in the Reacher series.

>385 SomeGuyInVirginia: My granny owned brass knuckles and played harmonica on the porch. She said, "Don't you look at me like that." *sigh* They don't make old ladies like that anymore. I miss blue hair.

>386 fuzzi: I'll have to defer to Karen who is the expert on the Reacher series. I know that The Killing Floor was one of the books that I did read, and I also remember thinking that it was surprisingly bloody. Man, that was a long time ago. I must be getting older because it was so much easier to read 20 years ago than it is now. Plus, I never fell asleep 3 pages in.

>387 mstrust: No, they don't make old ladies like that anymore then we are poorer for it. I saw my grandmother, all 5 ft of her, slap a grown man for using a racial pejorative in her presence. The grown man had the good sense to apologize.
**

I went to bed early last night and was half asleep when my boogaloo alarm went off around 9:15 p.m. I have my phone set up to go off when the alarm goes off, so all I knew was that there was this shrill shreiking alarm. And my first thought was that it was an incoming missile alarm broadcast over the mobile network. I was sure Putin had dropped a nuke.

Anyway, I see that it's my ADT alarm telling me that a basement window had been shaken, so then I'm just pissed off and worried, and when they call I had them stay on the phone while I went through the basement and look for any obviously forced signs. I hang up with ADT, then for good measure while I'm standing in my laundry room I shout God damn it I have a gun, just be on the safe side, then I scoot Parker upstairs and put a chair in front of the basement doorway as an added precaution. And then about midnight Parker jumps up on the bathroom console and knocks a tin onto the floor with a loud bang and I'm standing on the bed in a defensive position because I'm sure that somebody's come up the stairs and hit that chair trying to open the basement door. To add to my confusion, Parker acts all innocent and agitated and he's running around the house like his tail is on fire. By this time I'm absolutely sure that I'm under attack and I can only hope that it's a burglar and not the dreaded zombies. Phone in hand I slowly investigate, Parker running around my ankles with eyes as big as saucers, and me cursing myself because my handgun is in the basement in one room and the bullets are in the basement in another room. I do have a security camera inside in the laundry room so I check that and see that it hasn't picked up any activity, so maybe just maybe something fell...? Eventually I find the tin on the bathroom floor and put two and two together. Parker swears it wasn't him and that we're just both lucky to be alive.

Insomnia raises its lousy stinking head. I didn't sleep one wink last night.

A friend of mine who I've known for more than 20 years is coming to visit me in about 4 weeks. I'm really looking forward to it but it's also unnerving! It's the first overnight company I've had since the pandemic started. B is straight but I came out to him and we've been friends for a very long time. It's going to be really good to see him, and also really good because I don't feel like I need to spend the month before he gets here at the gym. You got to love straight guys, they really don't give a damn about so much.

One thing he has expressed interest in is going to a shooting range. So I need to put together some gun safety videos on YouTube.

>390 SomeGuyInVirginia: Yay company! That’s a great motivator.

I'll bet he's blown away by your house! And I'm sure you have some great restaurants lined up.

Hi Larry!

>386 fuzzi: Killing Floor is the first book in the series and the one that the Reacher season 1 is based on. I didn’t start reading them in order and in hindsight I’d recommend reading them in order if at all possible.

>388 SomeGuyInVirginia: My, my, what an exhausting time you’ve had with ADT and Parker. I bet he’d change his tune under oath, though.

Last year sometime there was an alert that 3 armed men eluding the police were in our area and for us to not confront them if seen but immediately call the police. I got my Colt Commander out, realized I don’t have much strength left but managed to load the magazine plus one in the chamber, and kept it with the safety on in whatever room I was in until they’d all been captured. How embarrassing it would have been to have known the gun was in the gun safe with armed criminals in our yard.

>390 SomeGuyInVirginia: Yay for B’s visit.

>391 2wonderY: You're right, Ruth. I'm going to make a concerted effort to get the ground floor completely finished. And by completely finished I mean all the boxes unpacked and put away. And I'll need to get John in here to hang the pictures.

You know it's not just drug dealers, it seems like all the tradesmen in Lynchburg are also on the hot side. John, the picture hanger, would last about 3 minutes on the gay market. He's got looks and personality. He's also married with kids so it's all moot.

By the way, when I say that the Lynchburg drug dealers are hot I'm basing that on their mugshots. But I'll send them along and you'll see! Apparently being pretty doesn't mean that you're good at your job.

>392 mstrust: thanks Jennifer! My realtor asked me what kind of house I was looking for, and I told him that I wanted a house that, when my friends drove up to it, they would be actually intimidated. So then he asked me what kind of house I'd like in my budget.

>386 fuzzi: >393 karenmarie: Fuzzi, always listen to the experts. Unless it's me claiming to be an expert and don't listen to a damn thing I say.

>393 karenmarie: Karen, I remember that! It was even in the news up here! God I would have been terrified. I've decided to keep a loaded .38 in the bedroom. Lynchburg doesn't have anywhere near the crime rate that Alexandria or the district had, but there is still a fair amount of opportunistic pilfering and batshit crazy drug addicts trying to break into people's houses at 1:00 in the morning. I look at firearms this way - you're going to spend months and months learning safety and how not to shoot your foot off, and you'll probably never need it. But the one time that you do need it you're absolutely going to need it. And I know it sounds sort of zombie apocalypse, but the pandemic has taught me that things can get weird and when they get weird they get weird fast. The day Russia invaded Ukraine I went out and bought a month supply of bottled water and stocked up on canned food. I wish I'd bought more because everything's gone up at least 50% since then, and I use the canned stuff that I bought all the time. About 6 months ago I bought a year supply of canned cat food for Parker. I tried myself for being paranoid, but that stuff is so much more expensive now.

>388 SomeGuyInVirginia: I found Killing Floor at the used book store, will let you know what I think.

>393 karenmarie: thank you!

>394 SomeGuyInVirginia: having some extra food on hand, especially for pets, isn't a bad idea. Nor is being prepared for that one time you need a weapon.

Best weapon you have is your head: be aware, be alert, don't assume.

>395 fuzzi: thanks, I'd appreciate your thoughts. I read the book a long time ago and I remember liking it, but I remember almost nothing about the plot other than there was way more blood than I thought there would be! Yeah

>396 fuzzi: yeah, when I was living in the district I came across a guy that had broken into my house. I did absolutely everything wrong. I got mad, I challenged him, then I kicked him out of the house. Fortunately he wanted to go, but to get out he had to pass with them a foot of me and right when it happened both of us realized the same thing- if this was going to go south it was going to go south at that instant. He just smiled and I stood there like a dumbass pointing towards the door. There were several other instances when I was in jeopardy but I always figured away out. God, I got stalked by a mugger once leaving the studio theater. That was scary. Really freaking scary.

I also need to get a gun safe bought and installed in the basement. No way am I going to be part of the team that takes that down the ramp to the basement door! Those puppies weigh 300 lb plus!

Jebus! This is a three bedroom house, technically four bedroom, and I'm already running out of space.

>398 SomeGuyInVirginia: it’s not a three bedroom house; it’s The Manor.

Snort! We can call it that but, sugar, manor it ain't!

>399 2wonderY: hahaha.

To The Manor Born...

>394 SomeGuyInVirginia: I wasn’t terrified for some reason, just extra alert and always looking out the windows or French Doors.

We have stopped stockpiling things. I haven’t decided if this is a good or bad thing yet. If I bought a year’s worth of cat food Zoe would immediately stop eating every single choice. No doubt about it. I’m already getting ready to change my Chewy subscription for one of the two Fancy Feast choices.

>398 SomeGuyInVirginia: Nope. Let the young, ridiculously strong men wrestle with a gun safe. Ours is in the home office, all 600 pounds worth. I can still wrestle the door open, though.

>402 karenmarie: cats have some sort of weird sixth sense that tells them ways to be obstructive or annoying. Parker absolutely will not eat Fancy Feast beef feast in gravy, and Buddy, my last cat, would only eat fancy feast beef feast in gravy. I gave part of the beefiest to the local animal shelter and I'm keeping the rest because if Parker gets hungry enough he'll eat it. I love my little s*** head but last night I found myself bellowing at him because he was chewing on power cords. I swear to God I don't know why he's not already dead considering how many flipping cables he's chewed into. But I am glad he's not dead and I was very sorry for yelling at him.

I'm part of that nextdoor app and, in many ways, it's problematic because now I know every simple crime that has been committed within a mile radius of me. Do you want to know what I loved about the Washington Post? Multiple shootings, reported. Some guy robbed at gunpoint at the metro station? Not reported. Living in Lynchburg I know every freaking crime that is committed everywhere. It is not conducive to equanimity. Plus I know every pet that has escaped from its owner's house and is now lost in the wild, and by wild I mean local neighborhoods. Every single one of those lost pet posts breaks my heart. They are actually more troubling to me than ring video posts of some clown trying somebody's door at 3:00 a.m. but yes I follow all the posts.

And all that being said, I do know that somebody was lounging on my back deck because they left a hammer on the railing. Why did they need a hammer? I don't know. When were they there? I don't know but it was after dark. I made of my mind a long time ago that if I ever encountered anyone who had broken into my house during a time they would have reasonably expected somebody to be present, I would turn their entire upper half into a pink mist. So, sometime in the next few days I will watch a couple of Smith & Wesson safety videos, and then bring up the .38 and some shells and store them within easy reach of the bed.

>403 SomeGuyInVirginia: I recall complaining about one of my cats noisiness to a friend. My friend reminded me that once my cat passed on I'd miss the noise and wish him back.

He was right.

My current geriatric feline is 20, and makes the most annoying yowls, especially at night. One day I'll miss them, but not today...

>404 SomeGuyInVirginia: I know, the ND app is quite the rabbit hole of horrible things. I try to keep that in mind, but since my neighborhood is experiencing more and more crime, it's useful. And you're right about the lost pets. It gotten so bad that people started yell-typing "What are you people doing that your dogs keep getting out?!"
The hammer on the deck would freak anyone out, that's really scary. Anybody who breaks into a home knows they run the risk of being shot. Seems like your guy had a last minute moment of clarity.

>403 SomeGuyInVirginia: Chewing on power cords is not conducive to a long kitty life, is it? I just looked on Amazon, and you might want to consider this to protect Tinykin Skywalker. Not terribly expensive, either.

cord protector

>404 SomeGuyInVirginia: I got bored with NextDoor quickly although I’m still signed up for it. It’s mostly advertisements and complaints here in my neck of the woods, political crap, too. I don’t know what I wanted it for, but not for these three things.

Oh my goodness, a hammer left on your deck? I’d get the .38 upstairs, too.

>405 fuzzi: I hear you all right. There are nights when Parker will jump up on the bed six or seven times, and he wants to be petted reach visit And if I don't pet him he will bite my eye. Long story don't ask but it's a thing. Your friend was right, and all those sometimes I'm more sincere than others I always tell P-Bitty to jump on up. Buddy was 25 when he died and he collapsed when he was about 24. For a solid year I baby that cat along. I moved my mattress into the living room because that was where he started sleeping, and I had that's come by to treat him at home, and when he was having a good day I always took him outside and set with him in the sunshine. After many months he did rally and was his old self for a spell. And then one late summer afternoon he collapsed and 12 days later he was dead. And I never one time regretted anything I did for him. And I'm pretty selfish. Truth. And I do it all over again just to have him jump on me at 6:00 in the morning because it was daylight and he was hungry and I needed to get up already!

>406 mstrust: Ack-shully, at the time it didn't even occur to me that they were thinking of breaking in. Break-ins are extremely rare in Lynchburg. Hell, this is 'pretty mouth' country and everyone automatically assumes that everyone else is armed to the teeth. Very few break-ins and very few muggings. My first thought was that they were trying to get steal the catalytic converter from my car, since my car was parked 5 ft from my deck. But yeah it was scary. In order to lay the hammer where they did they had to stand immediately outside my dining room window.

>407 karenmarie: Oh you are so right about the ND app. And each one of those lost pet posts just tears me apart. It's still good for identifying local events, but it can get as nasty as Facebook especially around political topics.
***
I've had really bad insomnia for several weeks. I was asleep earlier, and will almost certainly fall asleep about an hour from now and crash until 9:30. I did today's Wordle and cleaned up the kitchen, and got a few things ready to sell on eBay. Then I got the fidgets and had to take a couple of Ropinerol, and now I'm waiting for them to kick in so I don't spend the next few hours acting like I'm riding a bicycle in bed. Freaking restless leg syndrome is a thing.

I found out last night that I've lost access to the Arlington county library system. That's a real heartbreaker because their online offerings are so much more robust than even Fairfax county. I think I'm going to call tomorrow and do a hail Mary and see if I can renew as a library donor rather than the resident of Northern Virginia; that means writing them a check. Same thing happened with Fairfax county but I called the information desk and the lady I spoke with extended my membership for 100 years. Sweet! Arlington county told me, 'Tough cheese.'

I've been reading a book a day for the past few days, and should be on track to finish The Bookshop today, written by Penelope Fitzgerald. And I turned my TV on last night for the first time in months. I watched about half of World War Z and about 3/4 of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. I've never been able to sit through World War Z, my attention always wanders as soon as they leave Jerusalem.

This section of Virginia had some remarkable rainy weather over the past couple of days. I've got an old sports injury and the day before the rains came my left foot ached like a summgun. I had to hobble around on Saturday it was so bad. But today the storms have broken and it's perfectly fine, doesn't ache at all. It's the barometric pressure. I feel like Fred G Sanford complaining about his rheumatis!

Hiya, Larry.

Bad insomnia! I hope it's gone.

I'm sorry you lost access to the Arlington county system. Interesting about donor status perhaps getting you access again. I'm highly amused that you sweet talked Fairfax county into extending your membership for 100 years.

I read World War Z but haven't watched it. I had a copy of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies but the cover disturbed me so much that I finally got rid of it.

And, finally, sorry about the rheumatis...

Give Tinykin kitty skritches from me if he'll accept them.

100 years! You'll be hanging a tote bag from your walker by then.
Good luck getting your privileges back, and let us know how it turns out.
And sorry to hear you're hobbling! Foot pain is probably the worst because it makes you stop and consider if you really need to walk across the room.
I've been dealing with a book injury for about six weeks. I spent two nights struggling for hours to keep a tightly bound hardback open to read in bed. It was too much for my freaky tiny hands, and after two nights, I woke up and could barely raise my arms. Ever since, I've had mostly painful days.

>411 mstrust: “book injury”. Ha!

I know. That's what I've been calling it and I figure if there's one group of people who would understand my insistence on keeping that damn book open...

>409 SomeGuyInVirginia: you can get books by intra library loan I think?

Your new library will request books from Arlington, or whatever library the books are at.

>410 karenmarie: Tinykin Skywalker thanks you for the skritches! I haven't spoken with anyone at the Arlington library yet, writing a check goes against my Extreme Frugality thing. I also wonder what they would consider to be unacceptable amount? Arlington county is really tiny, I don't think it's larger than the district and that's 10 mi by 10 mi. The thing is, everyone who lives in Arlington county makes tons of money. Oh well, we shall see as the chorus girl said to the bishop.

>411 mstrust: Yikes! That's really kind of scary! Has anything like that happened before? Can you try soaking your hands and forearms in hot water, just holding them under the tap? And why isn't my holding the book for you?!

>414 fuzzi: True, that's at least something. What I immediately missed is access to their ebook collection. They really have a much wider selection than Fairfax county does, and the wait time for popular books tends to be slightly less than Fairfax. Oh well. I also need to head to Charlottesville and sign up for the Albemarle county library system. Also, I need to see if I can sign up as a UVA library patron.

I graduated from BYU and they have a truly remarkable library system. I should probably dig up my sign in credentials and see if I can check out ebooks. One thing about the Mormons is they encourage people to read books, and BYU had a copy of everything but if it was considered to be at all objectionable you had to go to the locked case librarian to request it. To their credit, none of the locked case librarians ever batted an eye at anything I wanted to check out. But the school was getting kind of creepy by the time I left, so I also don't doubt that my reading habits were being reported to school administrators. But if they were I never heard anything from them.

Library systems go through cycles of inclusion/exclusion. I never lived in Ohio, but just next door across the Ohio River. The card was free for a very long time, then for a short while it cost $10/year, which was well worth it because the Ohio system is superior to West Virginia. Then admins realized that circulation numbers were more important than income from card registrations. I now have access to all their electronic media from Kentucky in perpetuity or until they change policy once more.

>416 2wonderY: thanks Ruth, that is encouraging. Even though I'm having to jump through hoops to get my library card renewed, I can't help but admire whomever is directing the Arlington county library system. I just wish they'd give a long time patron and cheapskate a break already for Christ's sake. Like you said in your post, I do feel that this restriction to Northern Virginia patrons is probably temporary. At least, I hope so. Arlington county is turning into a tech and Fortune 500 hub, so it's really sort of hard for me to predict what they made do in the future. I can tell you as a long time Arlington county patron that the current requirements are...not inclusive.

>415 SomeGuyInVirginia: I've never had arm pain before but I've had hand pain from heavy books. It's like trying to balance a pizza on a fork.
And are you saying that I should have Mike holding my books while I read and say, "turn"? It's a thought...

Wow, shouldn't the library be trying to have more patrons, not fewer? Do the changes benifit anyone?

I am absolutely saying that Mike should stand there holding the book and waiting for you to say 'turn'. And he should be wearing lederhosen and with a big rubber ball stuck in his mouth! But maybe that's just what I would demand. And I would demand it! I mean not of of him, but Hugh Jackman? Totally. Leather britches and big rubber ball in his mouth. Like Christmas in July.

>418 mstrust: I've had pain from trying to hold hardbacks, so I only buy paperbacks now.

>419 SomeGuyInVirginia: There must be some kind of Box of the Month club that caters to your specific interests. Google. If Hugh Jackman's likeness isn't printed on a body pillow, it'll be Ryan Gosling's.
Have I pointed you towards a day of searching? You're welcome.

>420 fuzzi: I look for paperbacks first, or failing that, a Kindle version. Hardcovers have become a last resort as I know I'll fight it the whole time.

I'm trying to think if I've read anything recently that I could recommend. I did absolutely love the Empress of Ireland by Christopher Robbins, about his friendship with the Irish film director Brian Desmond Hurst in the '70s and early '80s. It's a gorgeous book about a gorgeous man who led a gorgeous life, a life that probably would be impossible to lead in these enlightened and connected times. Admittedly it's not everyone's cup of bourbon. And actually the narrative is a little jerky in the last half, but I suppose that reflects his life as a successful author outside of Hurst's realm of influence. I did love it though.

Right now I'm reading Bridget Jones's Diary just because I feel like I have to. It's okay. Probably better than okay, but it's not my thing. Still, it's always coming up in conversations about books so I feel like I had to read it.

I play the lottery to win hundreds of millions of dollars so that I can have a 24-hour staff and order a cheese sandwich at 2:00 a.m. and know that it will be bought to me, and also because I would like to publish books. I know I know! But I'd rather lose money on something gorgeous than on the whims of a stock market.

Seriously though. I have these recurring fantasies about being so rich that I have a 24-hour staff. It's really kind of awesome. I'm sure it's not as awesome as actually having a 24-hour staff but it is a very delightful thought palace.

Oh my dear Lord. I've just watched the first scene from the first new The Kids in the Hall series, and I may be in heaven. Or having a stroke. I'll know better in the next few hours but it does seem to be heaven rather than a stroke. At this time. Apparently being in heaven and having a stroke have a lot of overlap and ambiguity involved. Who knew.

>424 SomeGuyInVirginia: Morose thoughts. If you must dwell there for a while, I’ll squeeze us some fresh lemonade and hold your hand. Do you have a porch swing yet? There is nothing better than that gentle motion.

LOL. Good luck getting a pic of his butt. I'll keep checking back.

Jenna's absolutely charmed at having Guncle Larry, by the way.

A friend and I were talking last night about a friend of hers, straight, who said that straight guys aren't adverse to having another man "play with their junk", as she puts it. We opined that perhaps a man might really know better what pleases a man? Enquiring straight minds and all that...

Maybe we'd better take this to PMs, Larry.

Not on my account, I'm well acquainted with Larry's rants and love them.

Oh, you never have to worry about MS. Seriously. Once, I was driving she and her husband and I into the Bellagio for the breakfast buffet, and when security wanted to know why I didn't want to open the trunk mistrust passed a $20 and suddenly it wasn't an issue. Jennifer=cool.

Well, I'm that guy. Crabby old fart. I got in from the grocery store this morning and heard music thumping in the background. I'm thinking, okay it's a holiday weekend and people have lives to live And I may not appreciate the noise but there is booger all I can do about it. So I'm unloading the car, and realize That the music I've heard in the background is the radio I've left blaring when I headed out. Does any of this change anything if someone's frisbee lands in my yard? Oh hell no! That ergonomically perfect plastic flying disc is mine. Bitch. Fill me and screw your TikTok!

In my defense, for several years I shared a wall on Capitol Hill with one of DC's most successful drug dealers. I grew to hate stereo noise in a way that only cloistered nuns can appreciate.

🤤 Right back atcha, Larry. Bribery is my middle name.
Oooh, you're a bad neighbor. I'd call the police on you and ask them to list you as a party house ;-)

Oh, Jennifer. Heartbreaker. You're just a heartbreaker! Look, all around you the shards of my broken heart scattered about hither and yon, here and there, higgeldy piggledy. I hope you're happy! At least I hope that someone's happy that my heart is broken and in shards all over this tarazzo floor. And while we're at it, I live in Lynchburg. What the f*** is tarazzo doing in... Oh my god I'm in hospital aren't I?! K, let me get the lay of the land and I'll be back with yous...

Look, doctor, you don't have a leg to stand on and I'm about to make you very sorry that you're even alive. Do you know what's better than my medical insurance? The fees that I paid to my attorneys. So this is what you're going to do. You're going to give me the roster of drugs you are about to inject into my person and I will okay some and mix the others. I may also require the aid of a Mexican dictionary, depending on your dispensary. Then, really, all I want to be is left alone and until my lovely attorneys arrive and determine what my current situation is. As is their want.

Sorry, been in Vegas for several days so didn't know all the misery I'd caused. Well, the misery I'd cause you at this moment, I'm always spreading misery around.
Now buck up, little buckeroo. I'll bet you're feeling more chipper than you were a few days ago. Or maybe you found a primo combo of whatever to get down your gullet on the 4th and you're still seeing fireworks.

Yeah, I'd broken out my emotional support vodka.

At the eye doc's getting dilated. Yay.

Trippy. I hope everything's okay.
I just noticed that I spelled "you're" as "your" in the above message so edited. It annoys.

Everything's great! I'd put off glaucoma treatment since lockdown, so two and a half years. Turns out my pressure had not increased even though I hadn't been taking the drops. Plus, it looks like I'll be having cataract surgery on my right eye sometime later on this year or early next. That I knew about, my right eye is pretty kaput right now.

I bought some new furniture! Let me get the pictures uploaded and I'll post them.

I cheated and peeked in your gallery. You’ve gotta edit your phone photo before uploading to tell LT where the bottom is. Just rotate it all the way around and then upload it. I know, it’s a stupid system…

I had cataract surgery, both eyes one week apart, in 2014, and have never regretted it. Glad the glaucoma hasn't gotten worse.

New pictures, please! Jenna and I want to see them.

>441 SomeGuyInVirginia: cataract surgery is a piece of cake. Worst part for me was the eye drops prior to the procedure, and the stupid eye cup I had to wear while sleeping.

Right eye settled at 20/25, which is a lot better than it was previously, 20/400. I can drive without glasses, woo!

Left eye had to be postponed due to Covid restrictions.

fuzzi - yes to the eye drops being a pain, after for 10 days for me. 3 sets, different schedules, then the other eye a week after that and therefore on a staggered schedule, 10 days, 3 sets. The eye cup wasn't fun either, although I'm a side sleeper so it didn't bother me too much. And yes to 20/400 and yes to driving without glasses. Regular, off-the-shelf sunglasses. I'm still grateful.

I've been cooking a lot lately, at least a lot for me, but right now I'm waiting on delivery of Chinese food because I absolutely simply can't Even conceive of preparing anything. And I have a fresh loaf of homemade bread, some really delicious orchard peaches, and well let's face it an entire kitchen full of food and food stuffs and the stuff to mix and heat up food. And I tried to think of something to make for dinner and all I could come up with was DoorDash.

I bought a couple of sticks of furniture. One is a very early Queen Anne desk with drawer, and the other a Sheridan writing desk in absolutely pristine condition. In fact, it was so lovely that I dismissed it out of hand thinking it had to be new, but the dealer assured me that it was no later than 1820. I was shocked! And I was also shocked to find a hidden drawer stuffed with old playing cards from the '60s, a junkie Japanese letter opener shaped like a sword, and what appears to be the real thing Japanese calligraphy brush. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that yes, I did finally have John the Hunky Handyman come over and he nailed a few things up for me. Gawd I love Southern men.

You've been gone for so long that I'm gonna punish you with the cold shoulder. There! Are you feeling my disdain?
Now post pics of your fab new stuff! Not the handyman (unless he's willing).

Yes, pics of the new stuff, please, including the handyman if he's willing. Although he's straight, right? So may not want you ogling his butt - well, you're doing that anyway, but he may not want to know that.

Way cool about the hidden drawer.

It’s the southern gentleman coming out who refers to those pieces as “a couple of sticks of furniture.”
Have you got your swagger stick and a mint julep to hand?

>448 mstrust: Not the cold shoulder! Noooooo! Don't hate me for being so easily distracted.

>449 karenmarie: He straight and married so, as far as I'm concerned, off the table for anything other than snarky comments. But he does have a lovely butt and I will stare at it while he's climbing up a ladder. And he knows it.

>450 2wonderY: Ruth, why do I think that you're a duchess incognito? Hummm?

Pics soon, dusting first!

'Morning, Larry! I look forward to the pics. They changed the Gardens & Books group to be by invitation only. Thank goodness that they accepted my request to join so I could continue to post here.

Imma go see David Sedaris at EweVeeAye on the 17th. Then I'm going to have my cataract measured for pre-op, and late in the month I start volunteering at the Commerce Street Theater for Nunsense (I know. They need the money.) I only made it through one of my volunteer nights for Arsenic and Old Lace, when I had lunch with a friend who tested positive for COVID later that day and went into quarantine for a week. Missing the show, but I did start watching the trashiest tee-bee shows I could find and that was fun

I watched the Blumhouse horror movie The Hunt, and found that I squarely hit both demographics- reactionary rednecks and east coast elite. Way to multitask! Then I watched an episode of The Librarians, who save the world from ancient and unseen forces. I've only ever seen a few episodes of Buffy but I imagine that the show is Buffy-adjacent.

I'm also still unpacking, but now instead of finding a place for stuff I'm selling stuff on eBay. So far, I
m glad to report that in also every case of 'this is cool but only a chump would buy it'. I have consistently found a greater fool than myself. God Biden forgave student debt and freed up all that discretionary income now that millennials no longer thing it's cool to drink. Buy my crap, youngtimers!

I have not yet found my comic collection which is reeeeeallly bumming me out. I did find my original edition of the Savoy Cocktail Guide from 1930. Long story about how I got it and, like all long stories, it's mucked up with Hitler's Nazis, so I'll tell it some day.

Intriguing teaser - A cocktail guide and Hitler's Nazis. I look forward to the story.

Hey you!
>453 SomeGuyInVirginia: Have fun at the show! I'll bet he's hilarious live.
Sorry you had to miss your volunteer work, but you can always work on another play there, right? I use to do make-up for my high school plays, and one of them was Arsenic and Old Lace. It got the biggest laughs at the premiere performance, in front of the whole school, from one of the girls playing an old lady. When she sat down in an easy chair, she was in a blousy dress and splayed her legs apart, flashing the audience.
I saw The Hunt too, and it was really good, very clever. And I was surprised to see Emma Roberts and Dennis from Sunny in Philadelphia in it.
Glad to hear you're finding suckers to buy your stuff on Ebay!