Goodreads

Well! Are we going to invite goodread refugees or not?

Do we have to tell them the secret password and handshake?

There used to be a double secret probationary membership, but we kept losing them.

Do you mean any refugee from the Great Gramazoner, or just those of the sister organization, the Chestamerofiggillians?

That is the sister organization, right, and not the enemies that arose from that one thing that happened that we are forbidden from mentioning? I'm afraid I can never remember.

I don't want my sisters here, not after I finally got a room of my own.

Ah, but somebody else's sisters could be a welcome counterpoint to the pool boys in The Other Place.

::parting the curtain and peeking in::

If I said I was a traveler from the frozen North?.. (Nudge, nudge, say no more).

You'd be a lumberjack who puts on women's clothing and hangs around in bars?

(goodness, people are shy around here!)

Hi Sheri,

Membership dues are five clams. The squirrels will be around to collect if you wish to join.

Tell the squirrel to watch out for the poodle. He's got a hot argument going with the local Squirrel Mafia about who has the fluffiest tales. Apparently it's a historical thing.

::slides in to the corner and slowly slides suitcase towards shadowed figure with the bushy tail::

::pretends not to see Shushelle while quietly making the secret hand signal::

::sits precisely, with fluffy tail curled neatly around her toes::

::gives two winks with right eye, one with left. Wiggles right pinky finger five times then touches side of nose while pulling on left ear::

::sneaks off to get the soft cushions and the canned rat::

BOO!!!!!!!

.

.

.

.

(giggle)

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

She shimmers past like a gentle zephyr and is gone.

::Tosses the canned rat and the cushions in the air::

EEEEEEK!

Hey, careful with the squirrels!

I don't see why. The squirrels are never careful with us.

Squirrels are uppity. Its in their mission statement. Along with nuts.

Nuts, uppityness, and tail twitching.

Don't forget the flowerbed usurping.

I, personally, have been a victim of the squirrel mafia. Years ago I was in a car that an unhappy squirrel chose as its method of suicide (I was not driving). My friends and I got out of the car and moved the poor little thing to the side of the road. For the rest of the spring, squirrels tormented us. At one point, they even dropped a huge tree branch in our midst. Luckily, squirrels have short memories.

I have no trust in the squirrels, though.

There was a proposal to give the agent contract to the pigeons since they indicated they would work for chicken feed. The motion didn't fly.

GOOSE, EH!

(it's Canadian)

Oh, that's cold.

It's okay. The fireplace in my igloo is blazing hot.

How long before it melts completely?

It never melts completely because, like my website, it is constantly under construction.

So it's a sort of perpetual motion igloo?

(Why are Canadian geese so mean when most Canadians are so nice? Is it some sort of export system?)

I like the geese.

Canada Geese are among the meanest creatures known to mankind. They poop untold quantities of waste and, through their aggressive behaviour, they undermine Canadians' intrinsically-held image of niceness. The Canada Goose Extradition Program was initiated as a means to contain their aggressive behaviour which is perceived as anathema to the Canadian niceness psyche.

Concerned Canadian citizens believe that this shameful aggression results in their niceness reputation being brought into disrepute and thus, created the Canada Goose Extradition Program as a way of formalizing their commitment and to continually guard against complacency. Administration of the Canada Goose Extradition Program is the responsibility of local governments and is supervised and enforced by local citizens: it is not a product of faceless bureaucrats.

At any time, brave Canadians can be spotted near the Canada-US border encouraging said Canada Geese to emigrate to the US and providing information regarding the boundless opportunities available to Canada Geese in the land of the free and home of the brave.

Attack geese are even more uppity than squirrels.

and they stop traffice!

That explains why so many of them are here in SC.

Although, really, I'd say the Muscovy Ducks that have invaded many of the waterways of Florida might rank high against a Canadian Goose. They are bigger than most geese, and just plain mean. They are known for chasing down the kindhearted folks who toss breadcrumbs, grabbing the bread (and the whole bag it came in) and occasionally a purse. I am not kidding. Dogs avoid them and even cats can find something better to do. And they are ugly, and not even good eating (there was a movement for a while to hunt them around Florida lakes, but the meat is nasty.)

It is the chipmunks that you really have to watch out for. They are masters of cute disguise but they know how to divide and conquer.

Actually, when we lived in Bangkok, people used to keep geese as a type of watch-dog. They can certainly be aggressive in keeping intruders at bay.

I once screamed at a chipmunk to drop a bagel that it had in its mouth- it did.

Impressive.

I've never thought to scream at a chipmunk.

I have met Racoons that would hold you up and take your wallet and your lunch, though.

You were lucky they didn't rough you up.

Wait'll you have a troop of vervet monkeys in your kitchen -- thugs in grey jumpsuits, I tell you. And when they leave, they'll have hijaced every last crumb of bread and trashed all the fruit and veg -- in about 2 minutes!

>44 hfglen: still waiting...